July 6th

[J.T.]

I will come out to the first members of my family.  I am pretty sure they have an idea, but of course I am nervous.  I just hope that when the time comes I don't chicken out.  So, i am writing a letter as well.  I'm wondering whether I should just hand them the letter and let them read it while i sit there, or just tell them and have the letter for backup.

[Nero]

What's the significance of that particular date?

Maybe give them the letter, leave, and give them time to digest it. Then, come back and ask if they feel like discussing it. Just an idea. In a letter, you can plan out everything you want to say, while verbal conversations rarely go as planned. I wouldn't sit there while they read it, though.
That would be completely nerve-wracking.

One note: My folks found out before I was prepared to come out. Now, should I suddenly decide transition isn't right for me, they will always know. Just make certain you are going to transition (whatever that entails for you) before coming out as trans. If you come out, and decide not to transition, you may regret saying anything. 

[J.T.]

nothing is significant about the day, except that i emailed them on tuesday and asked if we could get together on that date.

I'd like to share who i am with them.  I want to be recognized for who i am... and i really can't deal with not sharing this anymore.  Okay, so I'm early but I really think they can help me.  There's a lot of stuff I don't remember about my childhood.  I just can't hold all of this inside anymore, I've spent too many years depressed, unhappy, and in limbo.  I have no friends, really, so my family is my support network.

Yeah, this is a point of no return...  I've thought about that a lot.  If I do decide to not transition, i don't think i will regret saying anything, because I will have been honest with my family for the first time.  If i do, well then I'll have to deal with it. 

[Nero]

Yeah, I do kinda feel that way. If I did decide not to transition, at least my family will know who I am.
I am male whether I do anything about it or not. So, that's a good point.

[Nick]

I'd give the letter then run like hell lol. But thats me.

Actually when I came out to my mom, she didn't accept it as something other than a phase until my therapist told her it was real.

[Ms.Behavin]

You know you just never know.  I was fearful of telling my brother, so I saved him for last,  turns out he was totally fine with his new sister.  In his words, "well way did you not do this 30 years ago,  Mom always wanted a daugther".  I was floored. 

Good luck with the coming out. 

Beni

[J.T.]

Thanks... i find myself at peace in the days leading up.  Calm before the storm??  I don't know 

[sarahb]

I just wanted to give you a last bit of confidence and support before your big day tomorrow. Everything will be fine and tomorrow night you will be drifting off to a restful and sound sleep because you now know that the pressure of family acceptance is over. You will wake up the next morning to a brighter day. Even if your family does not accept this, which I doubt, you will still feel better that your family at least knows more about you.

Good luck and make sure to tell us how it goes.

Sarah

[Hypatia]

After coming out to myself, I waited two and a half years before I wrote coming-out letters to my sisters (just last week). I hadn't thought of Nero's suggestion before -- that I should wait to come out until I'm certain I want to transition -- but it did work out that way. Maybe he's right? What about "transgenderist" people who want to cross gender without transitioning? I dunno. Anyway, I'm definitely transsexual and am determined to go all the way. Best of luck, ht honey.

[J.T.]

It went really well... they weren't shocked but had lots of questions.  Always knew something was different with me but they weren't sure.  i feel great.  only problem when my sis asked what she should tell her kids.

[Ms.Behavin]

That's very nice J.T.  Sometimes family is great.  My brother said the same thing the he know I was different inside. Hope your July 7th is a very lucky day.

Take care

Beni