Observing Women

[Gina_Z]

It's fun to carefully observe women, like at a shopping mall. It's amazing to see all of the variations. There are beauties out there that make me feel so envious. There are women with nice bodies that do not have a clue about fashion. There are average women who look amazing just because they have taken the time to learn how to make themselves look good with makeup and flattering clothes. I've also noticed that here in the USA women tend to be a lot bigger than over in Europe. I know I myself need to lose weight. Did you know that portion sizes for meals are smaller in Europe? Europeans who vacation in the USA are often shocked by our huge portion sizes. Anyway, back to observing women in American shopping malls. I often see big and clunky women there with no sense of style and I'm afraid I'll fit right in there. Well maybe I'll do OK with the style thing. Maybe my exercise and diet will work. I must think positive!
    I actually think my biggest challenge will be to create a feminine voice. That will be a major part of passing right?  I think so.

[Tanya W]

Hi Gina, like you I enjoy observing how different women put themselves together fashion-wise. I actually find myself breathless at times, seeing someone put this together with that. I get so inspired! And, to be honest, a little bit nervous - 'I could never come up with such a look!'

A long time ago, I used to put down the whole fashion thing. Stupid. Indulgent. Pointless. That sort of thing. As I have come more into myself, however - and after many viewings of 'The Devil Wears Prada' (seriously!) - I find myself so appreciative of the beauty that clothing can be. The effect just the right scarf can have, for instance!

And, as you observe, good fashion sense does not seem dependant upon the 'perfect body' (whatever that is!?). I have seen plenty of what conventional culture deems 'attractively' bodied women that do not seem to know how to dress well (in my opinion) and plenty of 'less attractively' bodied women whose dress makes me go 'Wow!'.

[Gina_Z]

Tanya, it will be a learning process, right? What clothing works for me? How can I improve my body to make it more fun to get into clothing? My latest kick is yoga/stretching. And fasting. Ha.
edit: I just wanted to add that I am noticing and observing women in TV commercials. I saw a woman wearing a solid simple cami top, layered under this gorgeous sheer patterned top that had 3/4 sleeves and kinda long uneven hem. It looked wispy. I think she was wearing pants. Anyway, it caught my attention and I'd like to try that look. Women in TV ads.

[Ms Grace]

Couldn't agree more. Love to check out other women and how they present and dress and move. During my first transition it used to depress the crap out of me, but these days I just find them utterly inspirational. I keep a special eye out for tall women as it shows me how easy blending in can be with the right attitude and presentation.

[Gina_Z]

I'm tall and big too. Hoping to become more delicate looking.

[Tanya W]

Tanya, it will be a learning process, right? What clothing works for me?

Right you are, Gina. A long learning process; patience helps.

I find the whole thing complicated by the fact I am balancing at least three factors:
1. How my body feels (relatively small and slight)
2. How my body appears (6' 180 lbs and so on)
3. How I am presenting in the world (male with a femme/androgynous twist)

Sometimes it gets frustrating, but only three years ago I passed every day in the same male uniform: tan khakis with a dark shirt. Among other things, it was a way to avoid relating to how I really feel. So thankful I can at least ask the questions now: 'How do I feel today? How do I feel like dressing?' Wish I was braver in my choices. Wish I had more variety. Wish I looked like Lorelia Gilmore! Ah well...

So I try to relax and take pleasure in noting how women present, in asking another series of questions: 'How might I pull off something like that? What is it that has caught my eye? What do I need to adjust for myself?'