Socially awkward question

Edge · December 05, 2013, 06:22:26 PM

There are these friends that I like, but haven't known for very long especially in comparison to their other friends. I want to get to know them better. You know, be more friend than acquaintance. However, I'm not sure how to go about doing that. Help?

(Note: If I can't do that without pretending to be someone else, then it's not worth doing.)

Devlyn · December 05, 2013, 06:27:30 PM

Friendships just grow, there's not much more to it than just being friendly. What environment are you in with these people? Work, school, sports?

Edge · December 05, 2013, 06:30:20 PM

School. Friendships don't grow with me no matter how friendly I act. Or they do and end in hostility, but I'd rather avoid that.

Devlyn · December 05, 2013, 06:35:24 PM

Is there a reason you decide ahead of time that you'd like to be friends with someone? Do they do something you are interested in?

Edge · December 05, 2013, 06:38:31 PM

I like them. Isn't that why anyone makes friends?
I guess there are specific reasons. One person is Asatru and I want to talk about Norse stuff with him. One likes similar music to me. Mostly, I just like them though.

Devlyn · December 05, 2013, 06:43:14 PM

I'd jump straight into those topics with them, then. See what other common interests you have. Next thing you know you're at a Norse museum with your new friend!

Edge · December 05, 2013, 06:52:14 PM

Quote from: Devlyn Marie on December 05, 2013, 06:43:14 PM
I'd jump straight into those topics with them, then. See what other common interests you have. Next thing you know you're at a Norse museum with your new friend!

Haha! Not in this city, but maybe someday if things don't blow up in my face.
Er.. the problem I'm having with the music one is that he doesn't talk much, so I'm pretty sure I'm bothering him.

Devlyn · December 05, 2013, 07:02:55 PM

Not everyone makes friends easily, or is seeking them out. If your music friend is a keep to themselves type, their friends will be people who understand that and can maintain a low level of interaction in a friendship.

You mentioned things ending in hostility. Are we talking about friendships ending because of an incident? Because fights happen, things don't have to end because of it.

Edge · December 05, 2013, 07:46:55 PM

Ah... They tend to more hostile than just a fight and cross way over my boundaries.
How can one tell if the keep to themselves types actually like you or if they wish you would go away?

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Socially awkward question