Quote from: RebeccaFog on July 04, 2007, 10:53:18 PM
Hi everyone,
I took the name 'rebecca' when I first figured out I'm not a man. I like that name. I think it is beautiful and strong and I really do feel like a Becky, but now that I've stopped rolling around on the wheel and have settled permanently into androgyne, I'm wondering if I should rethink my name. I was kind of wondering that when Laurry changed to 'Laurry'. It seems to make sense that I should choose a name that represents both genders or no gender at all, which is how I identify now.
There's no rush on the name decision. I'm just thinking about it and am wondering about your opinions. I used to call myself 'robot' before I accepted my gender variance. So, I have that in mind, or robotica, or robecca, or something entirely different like wishfire (just kidding wishy). Maybe I'll poke around in mythology or scifi or just choose a word out of the dictionary or encyclopedia like ceaser did in the 4th planet of the apes movie (those who have been following my posts in sexuality will know I have a thing for his mother 
irony huh?)
Quote from: Laurry(Yes, I said Infinity times 2...you do the math)
I agree with Laurry on everything except this fact. Its Infinity times Pi=3.1416. Options must be in a circle. The universe is a circle, and the radius is Pi*R. R in this case is infinity. Sorry your wrong Laurry.
I agree with Elizabeth, Katia and Nero.
Just go by the name you like best. Being an androgyne doesnt limit names. When I first came to this site it was just after a few months of talking with my life partner. All of my life I had never gone by a female name at all. She had asked if there was a female name that I went by. I had no clue. We talked about different versions of Ken and Kenny, which lead to Kendra and / or Kendall. So when I registered for the site I put Kendra. Sometimes she will use that name for code when out in public, but normally of course we dont use each other's names in common conversations. People normally only use partner names when talking to other people about them.
After a year or so, I didnt like just having Kendra, since to me it seemed fake. So I added Ken in front. Then I typed Ken/Kendra/Kenny/Kendall/KK
in the spot bellow my pic, since I really dont care what others call me. They can pick whatever they feel most comfortable with.
Just make sure your true to yourself and you dont feel pressured to change your name just for androgyne sake. Part of being an androgyne is having the full spectrum or all spheres open. One can be an ultra feminine person and still be called "Tom" or "Bob". Having a androgynous name is just one personal choice where there really isnt a right answer, except whats right for you. Whether your becky, rebecca, robotica, or wishfire or whatever, just as long as your comfortable with it as an online name. Its all the same to us, or most of us. I guess there might be a few name-sensitive people who might question the whys and whats of name, but its none of anyone else's business really.
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Some of the other little things messing with me is how do I relate to the TS's. I was studying to become one and, for a time, felt like one. Now, however, I feel like a phony if I try to give advice to a transsexual.
I relate to TS's as equals. I am not better nor lesser than them. CDs are the same as well. My beliefs in having all "options" open is inclusive to them. You'll see some of my posts include CD and TS, or non TG info. I really dont believe that the lines of definitions are as stark and black and white as some make it to be, rather they are blurred and sometimes overlap. I believe a AG can look like anything, can even get srs, think anyway, feel anyway, behave anyway, as long as there is something in them that feels a little different then 'just male' or 'just female'. I'll let the definition-fetish people and amature-philosophers argue about whats what, but to me its a waste of time.
Dont take anything that I have written nor anyone else as a map to a specific destination. Rather they are possibilities. The ones I make sometimes I make just because I havent seen them anywhere else. Back when the boards were younger, there were a few that talked about the androgynous dressing. Having seen that and never seen only little written about it on practically any site, and being one of my interests, I took a poll then asked questions to form androgynous guides. Like others have mentioned, androgyne doesnt mean appearance. And androgynous arent necessarily androgynes. But as a later poll showed around 50% feel like their androgyny affects their appearance, so for those half, its an option now at least talked about. Its something now at Susan's that wasnt their before January 13, 2007, that I made with a lot of influence from other androgyne members.
Some posts I write just for conversation. Some I am passionate about. Somes for debate. I like making polls, because they bring out data thats many times not found anywhere else in the web that can be very useful to others. And I love Q and A discussions, because thats what I like reading myself. Occassionally I like reading life experiences.
I think at the core of any androgyne discussion is just "without gender boundaries, what is right for you." I personally go a little further in saying "try something new that was in the past taboo, or you might be a little fearful of (as long as it doesnt hurt you or another person physically). Then judge if its good or bad, right or wrong. Just break the gender boundaries to find out. And going back is a real option if you find thats where you should have been all along. Or leap to another spot if thats more right. Or try something else. " I am not a flamboyant person. And when I meet new people, like currently when I changed jobs, I go in my shell a bit more. It will be a while before I feel comfortable at my new job to feel free to express myself more naturally.
QuoteI love those guys and girls, but I don't want to be mistaken for some kind of whacko who uses the name 'rebecca' but isn't even on the path to transition. I guess this is another reason I'm thinking name change; so as not to have people feel I am misrepresenting myself.
If you want it to remain the same, keep it. Dont change it for anyone else's opinion. If someone thinks your misrepresenting, besides yourself, on something that is personal to yourself and really none of their business. I have never looked at someones name and questioned the validity of it.
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Another place where I feel a little lost is that when I thought I was a Transsexual, I knew exactly what I needed to do to make myself into one complete person. As scary as transition can be, it is easier in that you know you have a specific path to travel and that if all goes well, you will reach a point where you know you have done your work and have become the person you were meant to be.
I hate to whine about this, but coming to terms with being an androgyne has been extremely weird. I have suffered a great and cruel agony just discovering my GID and then working through it. However, it feels to me like I went through complete and total hell only to discover that I was done. The trip is over and I'm happy, but let's face it, it's anticlimactic. It's like Dorothy going through all of that struggle just to discover that she had the power within her the whole time.
I am a different person than the one I was, but where are my battle scars? People I know will never grasp what I went through.
The road and path is entirely open, you may be there right now. Or you may find something in your life not exactly feeling right. Either way the path is entirely open and not limited.
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Please understand that I am not complaining. I am very fortunate to have come to understand my nature in a way that many people never will. I am quite happy with my androgyne self even though, at some level, I still kind of lack a basic understanding of it. I think that is only because there is so much information for men and women concerning gender, sex, psychology and such, but there is little information or understanding of androgynes.
And this section of susans can use much more information. You can even help bring and fill the section with info that will help yourself or others when traveling their own path which is open to themselves.
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I actually feel guilty now because even though I am an androgyne, I have no problem with gender expression. I have always liked dressing simply in the type of clothing that you can throw on a man or a woman. Sometimes I try to soften the look with a bunch of bracelets, necklaces, or head scarves, but my look is just naturally neutral. I feel a little guilty because I know that a lot of people in the TG community take a lot of flack for their gender expression and little old vanilla me has no visual signals that could really be dangerous. I am not trying to avoid trouble or to hide anything. But I feel like a worm because I'm being myself, which is nonmainstream, but I do not need to defend myself like others do.
Grrrr.
No need to feel guilty. Gender expression isnt the same as gender identity. Sometimes it is influenced by it. And by other factors such as personality type, functions, and beliefs. I am a seamstress, amature jewelry maker, artist, and cosmetologist student. So thats why many of my posts dwell in that arena. Having said that, I am not listening to anyone that tells me to stop posting them. I feel it gives an option not talked about prior on the site. Some people like politics, some philosophy, some definitions, some social events, some religion, some plastic surgery and procedures, some news, some language and literature. I like what I like. And the percentage of androgynous or nuetral style is higher in this section then in the others. In reality I like the styles that mix genders. Personalities that mix. I also know others dont feel the same and I respect how they feel.
