You and i are trimmed from the same cloth... Sorta. I thought i perferred women to men, but lately i feel like my attraction to women is mostly envy. Like how girls say "omg, ur so pretty!" I have never really felt sexual attraction to either gender. As a male i could not see myself sexually involved with a man. If i were physically a woman tho i would have no problem dating and making love to men. I tried "making whoopie" (as my grandma calls it) with a girl once but it felt wrong and was an awful experience for both of us. I was a virgin and she, well lets say shes been around the block. I have always known i should/would be better off as a woman. I would suit my personality much better as a woman. With that said, i feel like being a man isn't the worst thing in the world. It sucks, its like you said, more of an inconvenience than an utter mistake of biology. Just hang in there tho, do some soul searching. From the sound of things you very well may be trans. Loving men may have been enough for 19 years to get you closer to being a woman, but now you desire more. I recommend seeing a licensed therapist who has experience in gender variant individuals cuz they can help u see what you yourself cannot.
Welcome to the family, were glad to have u here! Feel free to PM me if u ever just wanna talk. Im no therapist, but i hope to be one day and i revel in the chance to practice this.
