~ Hair drama llama ~ Any advice, please?

[Stella Stanhope]

Hey there! Oh and ~ HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! ~ to everyone

OK, time for the world's smallest violin to play... as its about my hair, :p But if anyone has any tips I'd greatly appreciate it, and perhaps this post could help others with similar issues.

Basically my hair has been on life support since MPB kicked in suddenly and made it shed back in late '11, with a combo of Finasteride (for a year) and Minoxidil (continuously). The result so far has been that my hairline is a warzone of blank patches, old straggly hairs, and random soft new hairs. The rest of my hair is apparently (according to the trichologists) still full all over apart from the receding hairline (which is thankful and encourgaing!). But the overall health of my hair is terrible and when looked at close up, my hair looks like its been fried and then butchered and smashed by a thousand safety pins. I have Monilethrix and Trichoclasis at least, which are types of abnormalities that have appeared from nowhere.

On a good day my hair looks fairly thick, nice from afar, up-close it looks damaged but it keeps its weight. On a bad day my hair looks very thin from afar and even worse close-up as it turns flyaway. It appears to be constantly see-sawing between either going towards a decent recovery or the MPB boss-level.

After two years of concentrating solely on life-support, I haven't had it cut, dyed or touched at all, all I've done is try to preserve it. But I need to do something practical with it now, it needs a style or some radical treatment, as it looks too scruffy for work and not pretty-enough to look good. I don't however feel its bad enough to warrant chopping it all off. It still has potential to look good. As for a return to glossy, silky and manageable hair - I very much doubt this would be a possible outcome without estrogen, and even then I'm dubious as to how much estrogen could actually do. So I'm concentrating on thickening it up, even if it means it'll look a bit bush-like.

In order to add volume what I am considering is wearing hair extensions at the back (as the hair could be strong enough to support the extra length), so that I can pull more hair forwards in order to cover my receeding hairline. Or I'd wear a clip-on fringe, however I haven't yet found any clip-on solution that looks in any way remotely realistic or suitable. So, any ideas, anecdotes or suggestions or companies to buy good things from? Thanks!

Showing the jagged edges. I could paper with my hair.
Its very Jack Nicholson, my hairline. Heeeerrrrre's Johnny!
Tried an Ellie Goulding style sweep to one side. Tis the result.

P.S To the Mods - I couldn't find a forum in Beauty which is devoted to hair, hence why I'm posting here, but if this posts needs to be moved, then I'm cool with that of course.

[VeronicaLynn]

Stella, I have kind of thin hair myself. Have you considered a shorter look? I don't mean chopping it all off, either. I know it seems counter-intuitive, but shorter can look more feminine and fuller if you choose the right style. What looked really thin long on me looks great chin length, I'm not on any hormones or products. It won't work forever, but it can probably work for at least the next few years...

[Ms Grace]

Your hair looks pretty good considering what you've listed as problems. I'd suggest talking to a good hairdresser. Are you full time yet? If not, maybe ask for something a bit andro and start working towards a look you like.

[Vicky]

When my "female hair" came in after starting HRT, it was about 70% the strand thickness of my male hair, and so darn straight you could use it for a plumb line, except when the weakest sneeze of a breeze sent it into my mouth.  I have used clip in hair extensions that worked very nicely and looked great until I had my current hair color job.  (Its now the color of the hairpiece in my avatar, but it has nowhere near the body)  I could not get a clip in piece like I had in my color, and dyeable human hair stuff is too expensive.  I did recently have a "body wave" permanent that gave the hair more texture up to about my male hair level and while I like it, and it can be done for men as men, it has mildly screwed up the color I love.  Monday is hair day again!! 

I really think you should go to an actual hair stylist and get some help with a trim and clean out of split ends, and yes, an hour of checking out some hair styles, but I agree that your top pic looks fantastic as is.  Comb-over is not a super good idea.  If you can get to a wig salon, there is a type of hair piece called an "integrating top piece" that is placed on your head and your own hair pulled through a special honeycomb shaped wefting.  I wore one of those many times and it looked fine, again a victim of my hair color change.  I am obviously full time now and did not try to really "transition" my hair until after I had been on HRT for a while.  My hair gets mid shoulder blade length at best and your length is something I envy and can be a good basis for being really pretty. 

[Stella Stanhope]

Hey everyone! Thank you so much for the helpful comments everyone! It's made me feel better hearing your advice about this, as its a very depressing experience. A receding hairline is one of the top worst male physical traits to have and it looks absolutely horrific if you're dressed female when it's seen. My face is very angular and it needs hair to soften the hard edges. At least there's options though :-) And support. Woot! Thank you for the compliments btw. My hair looks good for a male (benchmarks not being that high when you get to 28) and awful for a female, but at least its still here and can look OK when I've conditioned it.

Anywho, yes a hair stylist visit would be a great idea Ms Grace. I did get jaded by visiting hair clinics, some of which charged £100 a time. They basically had a look at my hair, suggested the usual stuff and that was it. I've learnt tons online about hair, skin, HRT, HGH and hormones, and when I mention what I've learnt to the GP - the GP usually just gawps and has no idea what I'm on about. Nice to know the health professionals are keeping their knowledge base up after leaving college, eh.

A stylist would be much cheaper than a quack though, and the idea about the Integrating Top Piece sounds excellent! That sounds ideal. Thank you!
Yes, the hair needs serious attention and I need a direction to go in so that it can look smart and feminine, and not prog-rock hippy, which it closely resembles atm.

No Ms Grace, I'm not full time as I'm oddly very male looking, despite being petite and with feminine size ranges. Whenever the wind blows (which is always in the UK) my hairline is always gleefully revealed by the wind. I really really do not want to present as "female" until I would actually look plausibly feminine.

VeronicaLynn - interestingly when I used to have my hair in a bob back when I was 23, people thought I was gay or possibly FTM. Long hair seems to have a sort of masculinising effect, but yet I still need the long hair to soften my features. Its so strange! I get gendered female sometimes when I'm male and gendered male whenever I dress as female. I don't understand it, perhaps its a conspiracy by the Lizard people :p I would return to a mid-length do... but I am at the stage of being petrified it will never grow back. Its turned into a phobia.

Vicky - are you saying that your post-HRT hair is actually weaker than your "male" hair was?