Hellooo there!
I shall message ye, then.
Ahh yes, the infamous Real Life Test. I've noticed that most of the stages a transperson has to go through in their journey is just bullsh*t. The whole journey is farcial. Dysphoria should be treated by hormones and if the patient wants surgery then that's what eventually is provided. The end.
All the milestones and hoops to jump through, people to tell, name changes, marker changes all add a needlessly massive layer of complexity and difficulty to the whole endeavour. Transition and hormones should be about your body and yourself. It should involve no other hoops to jump through other than proving you are sane, not a criminal, are health-conscious and are aware of all the risks.
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I have a special place in my dungeon of hate for the RLT.
The idea behind the concept of the RLT makes sense; "To understand the consequences of what you want, you must be put into that role first before changing your body".
But this makes sense only in a child's black and white world, where there are no other considerations.
The RLT is also supposed to hive a cis male the idea of what its like to be a woman, so they can experience what other cis woman on the planet experience. Once again, a clever idea thought up by naive people. I am amazed that intelligent doctors can also have the logic and common-sense of six year-olds. In the real-world, RLT is stupid. And why?...
Because there's a MASSIVE difference between a woman who's always been a woman and looks like one, and a man effectively dressed up as a woman. So how, in God's name can the pre-HRT transperson be expected to experience anything like what a cis woman might experience during her day. It's insane. Congratulations medical profession, you've taken a male socialised and physically masculinised person and put them into a situation of humiliation and danger in order to prove a point that doesn't exist. Cis woman have millions of combinations of experiences and the person doing the RLT won't be seen as being a woman anyway... so. There is no point. Adult transpeople are not children, and therefore should be given the respect and responsibility of making their own decision. If the transperson is themselves naive, hasn't thought it all through finds when on HRT that being the opposite sex its totally not what they expected - then that's there own problem. That's adult responsibility in action right there. When doctors plan to give an obese person an organ transplant, they don't first ask the obese person to do an RLT involving eating salads 24/7 to "prove" they understand the consequences and expectations of receiving a new organ. Nope, the doctors perform the operation and if the obese person continues eating pies and dies, then that's it. That's adult responsibility and freedom and accepting the consequences, in action.
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Changing gender markers and name in order to claim HRT is another potential requirement that I have a special place in my anger for. Once again a requirement to change everything whilst you still look like a man. So you get to be in the hilarious situation of introducing yourself as a pretty name who's female when you're (according to cis people) obviously a dude in drag. An argument I heard supporting RLT and "standing up for being trans" being loud-and-proud, etc., is that the more visible we are the more accepted we'll become in the near future. Once again, an intelligent concept if it were coming from a smart 6 year old with no grasp of real adult life.
A man in a skirt with stubble is never going to be accepted by cis people as a positive & valid occurrence, its also personally humiliating for the transperson (as they themselves don't want to look like a dude with stubble), so it actually damages the transperson and gives a negative and stereotypical image of transpeople to the population. Thus setting our whole movement back, AGAIN.
All of the above requirements of why there are thousands of non-passing pre HRT transpeople (especially MTFs) loosing their jobs and having social scorn heaped upon them, because their doctors told them to change their names, markers and to turn up to work in make-up and skirts whilst they still look male. Of course that's going to turn out well, isn't it. And the sad thing is that so many are willing to go through with the requirements out of desperation and become blinkered to the reality of what will happen.
I'm fed up and upset (for the transexuals involved) to be reading story after story about people who've gotten into ever more social and financial trouble because they're following the requirements to the letter and are therefore now sitting ducks for discrimination.
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In the case of MTFs and females, we live in a time where women have more social freedom to transgress gender norms and expectations. Alot of my straight cis girlfriends (when I was presenting as a cisnormative straight male whilst dating them) were petite, pretty and attracted to guys, but liked to wear male clothes, male deodorant and drink pint after pint of beer. Plus many women have traditionally male names. And why? Because they were secure enough as woman but liked to play with convention and liked to explore their own fluid expression. THAT is how a massive majority of Westernised woman are today. So the very idea of needing to experience the stereotypical stuff in order to appreciate your own trans-ness is complete bullsh*t.
A transwoman has just as much right to wear men's Saville row suits, call herself George and work as a ball-breaking ad-executive as much as a cis-female does. Thus current RLT is based on stereotypes and out-dated models of the female role and its presentation. And because cis woman have this freedom, then the RLT of a transwoman should be about just presenting however they damn well like so long as they personally understand the gravitas and consequences of what they are doing, like a proper adult. The REAL issues a pre-hormone transexual needs to be taught is about how their body might respon on hormones - negatives and positives, and therefore how these might impact upon on their interaction with society. The actual requirements should be medical ones such as - don't smoke 50 industrial-strength ->-bleeped-<-s a day, etc.
....Ok, and now I'm calm :p
