I am feeling a tad confused like I won the lottery, and yet somewhat terrified!!

[Sarah leah]

So what is it I am getting at? Why am I confused

Well to be very frank, I have been trying to get assistance for two months from local GP's in a rural South Australian town. During the course of this endeavour, I have seen three GP's who vilified me when I mention I want to see Dr Lyons in Adelaide (to get started on HRT) although the first two I did not say it was gender issues or for HRT, they just flat out refused to refer at all. The third stated I have no desire to assist you kind, please look elsewhere. I never said it was gender related either

Finally, I spoke to a young Indian doctor in the next town over. I had seen him recently after I was a victim of an assault and he prescribed me some anti-anxiety medication. I spoke to him about my anxiety, PTSD due to being a witness to sectarian violence in Ireland as child and the death of some of family (which I witnessed at 9 years old). I spoke about the assault too but not the gender part. I explained my anxiety was being a pain and I had  "other" issues I wanted to address with a Psychiatrist in Adelaide.  I gave him Dr Lyons name, address and phone number. Although I did not explain the "other" issues part. He said no problem I will refer you for your PTSD, anxiety and whatever other psychiatric concerns are causing you to feel upset. After that he smiled and, stating, "Phone their office and tell them it will be sent through in 48hours." He gave my hand a hard squeeze. Then I walked out!!!

• Have I lied to gain the referral to a gender psychiatrist or not?
• Am I a bad person because I did not tell the GP the whole story.
  
• Plus is it bad that I am petrified and a little bit excited?
  

http://www.genderqueer.org.au/sa-doctor-robert-lyons/   <---- this is the Psychiatrist

[Jamie D]

Talk with the Global Moderator here, Cindy, of Adelaide

[TessaMarie]

Talk with the Global Moderator here, Cindy, of Adelaide

What Jamie said.

Personally I feel the answers to your questions are:  No; No; & No.  But that might be just me.

Mostly I wanted to reply & say "Hi" to another Irish emigrant 

(I did not have anything near as traumatic an experience as yourself during the troubles though, thankfully.)

[Ms Grace]

It was appalling for those doctors to treat you that way, essentially denying you medical assistance. Just consider it a fudging of the truth to get you what you needed. So no, it doesn't make you a bad person. And yes, feeling giddy anticipation is quite normal!

[JessieBirdie]

Agreed, you gave the system what it deserved lol.

In the US there are mainly billing issues with insurance.  I've thus actually done something just like this with a carrier I used to be on.  When I saw my first endocrinologist, we actually sidestepped the problem by giving a diagnosis of endocrine disorder not otherwise specified.  My therapists have also given the insurance companies diagnoses other than transsexualism as well.

I haven't had an issue with my current insurance company tho.  I know my endocrinologist puts my reason for coming as transsexualism, but they still cover it...or well, covered it, now he's outta network lol.  The meds are still covered tho (although there was one weird incident with estradiol, but we quickly bypassed that by just contesting that denial).

[Sarah leah]

Thank you all for the replies. I feel less stressed now, but still feel a bit "mean" I suppose for only using half truths with this doctor as he really nice and empathetic to his patents. Still I guess we sometimes have to do what we have to do if we are going to get help.

And yes I am excited, I just have to find a way to speak to my little babies (9yr boy & 7yr girl). I love them and I think they will be good, but it is going to be a odd talk >.<

[Emmaline]

You are a wonderfully honest person.  Do not feel bad- you did the right thing, you dealt with bigotry without harming anyone in order to get the medical attention you have a right to.  Shame on them.

[kelly_aus]

Cindy is not the only one who knows Dr.Lyons, I see him also.

My referral to him was quite specifically for gender issues and I have a feeling you may have issues if your referral is not for that reason.

[Jessika Lin]

The third stated I have no desire to assist you kind, please look elsewhere.

What. The. Hell. Pardon my language but this is just *waits for red mist to clear*
*takes a deep breath*
*takes several more*
...I don't suppose Australia has any laws against transphobic discrimination?

Edit: For language.

[stephaniec]

Thank you all for the replies. I feel less stressed now, but still feel a bit "mean" I suppose for only using half truths with this doctor as he really nice and empathetic to his patents. Still I guess we sometimes have to do what we have to do if we are going to get help.

And yes I am excited, I just have to find a way to speak to my little babies (9yr boy & 7yr girl). I love them and I think they will be good, but it is going to be a odd talk >.<

I'm sorry I just woke up and my brain hasn't caught up with me yet so maybe I'm not understanding correctly. You found a doctor willing to help you he gave you a wink and sent you on your way. You forgot to tell him your transgender, so where's the problem.  I must of missed some thing.

[Unni]

No, no and no.
I can't spot any lies in what you said to the GP.
Not telling everything certainly don't make you a bad person, frankly I think it might be quite common. It's nice that he was very helpful towards you.
With something like this you can expect to feel both petrified and excited, and no, that's a good thing.

That's my thoughts anyway

[Jessica Merriman]

Please don't feel the least bit bad baby. You are doing what you have to in order to survive. We are the only class of human who everyone feels the need to verify and justify before we can be treated. We should not be in that situation to start with. You go girl! You have to remember also that some doctors are under intense scrutiny themselves and can only be vague and "wink" us on the correct path.

[Paulagirl]

You are not the only one who has met closed minded Doctors. As much as I love the Canadian 'It's your body' ethic, I met a really nasty one.
My first Endo referral said 'Nobody can help you except CAMH (Canadian addiction, and mental health).' When I responded that it was my belief that ANY Dr. can prescribe HRT, but an Endo is preferred, he flatly said 'No Dr. is going to help you.'
Guess what. I asked my GP for another referral. This new Endo said 'It's your body, and any ten year old can go on the net and self medicate, why wouldn't I get you going on hormones?' The voice of reason.

[Sammy]

I have heard stories about a doctor here who called transpatient "an abomination". Quite inspiring.

[Jessika Lin]

You are not the only one who has met closed minded Doctors. As much as I love the Canadian 'It's your body' ethic, I met a really nasty one.
My first Endo referral said 'Nobody can help you except CAMH (Canadian addiction, and mental health).' When I responded that it was my belief that ANY Dr. can prescribe HRT, but an Endo is preferred, he flatly said 'No Dr. is going to help you.'
Guess what. I asked my GP for another referral. This new Endo said 'It's your body, and any ten year old can go on the net and self medicate, why wouldn't I get you going on hormones?' The voice of reason.

*Sigh* I wish it was that fast for me, only one Endo here is willing to take trans* patients, and she doesn't accept referrals from GPs only from therapists plus she's got a 5-6 month long waiting list!

[suzifrommd]

Personally, I think you have grounds for a complaint against the doctors that refused to refer you for treatment for your transgender. That's discrimination and grossly unethical (not to mention evil).

[EmmaD]

I am not sure a failure to provide all the issues to the referring GP will cause a problem.  If the GP thought it was enough, assume it is until told otherwise.

My first attempt had me very nervous but the GP just said he didn't know enough about it and the treatment protocols to be able to offer the best care and advised me to find a GP practice that specialises in this stuff.  That is easy in Melbourne - Prahran or Northside.  It was good advice too.  He was young and not a white anglo-saxon middle-aged man - sorry for the stereotype but that demographic (I am in there too!) ->-bleeped-<-s me at times.  Rural GPs - I would struggle too TBH.  The first response I got was honest.  Refusing because of who you are is unethical.  The discrimination going on is frightening to think of.

That all said, the referral is done and once you have had the first session, the programme to move forward will be much clearer.  You did disclose "other issues" - that should be enough.  Anyway, they really don't have any idea what the patient's issues are until they eyeball you. A referral isn't a diagnosis.   I think you will be fine.

[Rachel]

no, no, no

congratulations.

[kelly_aus]

Feel free to make assumptions about Dr.Lyons, I've been seeing him for 3 years and know him pretty well, professionally at least..

With that said, he specialises in people with gender issues. Period. A referral for other reasons may not get you in the door.

I'd suggest you contact his receptionist and check for other requirements too.. I've heard that he now requires somewhat of a written history..

And I wasn't going to say this, but I will..

The treatment you received from those GP's was wrong, but it is as much your own fault as theirs.. You don't ask for this referral, you tell the GP you want it and why..

[Sarah leah]

I think I will be fine. I just need to contact the office and explain the predigest nature of a few doctors I have access too and the lengths I have had to go to overcome it. It is not like I am privileged enough to have access to GP's by the bucket load, there is five doctors in a 100kms and they are all over 60 years old except for the one I seen. In terms of the social status qua, I understand that for "old school" doctors it is a challenge hence when I broached the topic they freaked. Especially the second to last one. The first two I suggested I did not feel right in my skin and wanted to speak to someone about it. They seemed fine until they looked up Dr Lyons name then they became crass and typical WASPs.

That aside I have thought long and hard on this and I feel I did what I had to do and I would do it again. Do I feel a bit bad... well yes it goes against my nature to act with subterfuge, but there is times when we must fight to survive and I did that will my intellect rather than with words or fists.