The word '->-bleeped-<-'.

[Jayne]

I'll try to explain this carefully as i'll probably come across as a hypocrite with this post but bear with me.

I hate the word ->-bleeped-<- but have used it on a few rare occassions, a few times i've had to stand up to threats of violence from groups of small minded drunk men, on two of these occassions i've thrown the word ->-bleeped-<- into my response with the line "the first person who tries to throw a punch is going to get their ass kicked by a ->-bleeped-<-".
These people used the word to try to reduce me to an object of ridicule/scorn/sub-human so by saying that this ->-bleeped-<- will kick the ass of the first one to try anything then i'm making them risk ridicule by losing the fight to someone they deem lesser than them.
I've had some training in martial arts so i've been able to say this with absolute confidence when dealing with drunk people & it made them back down each time, sometimes using the exact language that drunk people throw at you can short circuit their tiny booze soaked minds

If people use the word without threats of violence then they just get a stern lecture as to why I find that offensive.
For the record, I DO NOT like violence, any time i've had to fight it has reduced me to tears afterwards, I have not had to resort to violence for over 20yrs as my words & my confidence have always been sufficient to get me out of any situation. I would never refer to anyone else with this word & I do not tolerate people aiming this word at me

[aleon515]

It's a slur, but I believe it is okay for people who have the word used against them to take it back. I believe this is mostly trans woman, so I don't think that I, as a trans guy, have the "right" to use it like that. I don't.

--Jay

[Jill F]

I guess it's OK if it's used as short for "transformer" and "transmission". 

[Lady_Oracle]

I think the whole trying to take the word back ideal is a bit silly. I just don't use any kind of slur at all. I call people by their names. I don't use racist words in my vocabulary nor any other kind of slur. As a society we need to move away from so many generalizations and just treat each other with a bit more respect. We have to change our current language for the better. Not continue the same old rhetoric in just a different variation.

[Oriah]

I think the whole trying to take the word back ideal is a bit silly. I just don't use any kind of slur at all. I call people by their names. I don't use racist words in my vocabulary nor any other kind of slur. As a society we need to move away from so many generalizations and just treat each other with a bit more respect. We have to change our current language for the better. Not continue the same old rhetoric in just a different variation.

You can stop using any word you want, but do you really think society is just going to follow suit?  These words won't disappear just because you don't use them.

[Parkhockey27]

I find it offensive when its used aggresively. If someone simply doesn't know the difference or what it means I don't really care.

[Sephirah]

The issue I have with the word is that I find it is often used to define someone by the condition they are dealing with. Which has very little to do with the person themselves. It often calls into effect a bunch of stereotypes which may be in no way accurate, or representative of the person to whom the word is being applied. And sometimes calls forth a bunch of assumptions, based on those stereotypes, which may be equally inaccurate. It removes the human being and replaces it with a process. An assumed way of life. It can take away the uniqueness of an individual and replace it with a framework by which they are judged.

People aren't conditions. They aren't processes. They're human beings. And, speaking personally, I would prefer to be called Lauren than a ->-bleeped-<-. I would prefer people knew me for what I do, feel and think rather than something over which I had no control at birth.

[Calder Smith]

I hope you're not getting that from what I said. If so, I've expressed myself very poorly.

I may have misinterpreted what you said.

[suzifrommd]

You can stop using any word you want, but do you really think society is just going to follow suit? 

Actually, I think with the campaigns against the N-word for people of color, the F-word for gay people, and the R-word for people with cognitive impairments, the higher purpose wasn't to get people to stop using the word but to raise awareness of the humanity of the objects of those slurs and their right to be respected.

[michelle]

I guess how you feel about the word ->-bleeped-<- may depend on your age and how you have heard it used.    Growing up I have always heard the word used dismissively usually by males to other males, as if to say you are less than dirt.    One of the worst things one male can call another male is that they are a sissy,  a ->-bleeped-<-.    This made it more difficult for me to accept that I was really a woman. Since I have come out publicly on Facebook and AARP as a transgender woman,  I have gotten insight into how women are treated by males in our society.    I have had become that the target of that the attitude that some men have toward women.    These men get sticky sweet like you are going to swoon all over them or you become an object of their lust.   One even sent me a link to a porno site as if to say you are a bitch and this is what men do to you.   My emotional response was so what.  I know how some men feel about woman, and I am proud to say that I am a woman and as a woman I expect to be treated by men as one and become an object of their crudity.   Its acceptance of this that helps me realize that I am really a woman and a ->-bleeped-<- and that I accept all of the garbage that goes with it.

This does not make me feel any different about the word ->-bleeped-<-,   I don't like it, because it is one more reminder that us women are seen as property and exist only to satisfy the carnal need of some crude and mindless men.    I accept my womaness and I am proud of it.   But I totally reject that some how I am less of being because of this get me up on my soap box.    And if I have become the object of some men's lustful fantasies it makes be proud and happy to be a woman.   What they think is their problem and not mine.

[Jessica Merriman]

->-bleeped-<-? When did this become an automotive forum?

*GIGGLE*  No doubt!

I prefer Miss, Ma'am or even Hey Lady myself. Anything other than that is disrespectful and meant to solicit an emotional response.

[Jill F]

->-bleeped-<-? When did this become an automotive forum?

My wife blew the ->-bleeped-<- in her BMW two weeks ago...

[Jessica Merriman]

My wife blew the ->-bleeped-<- in her BMW two weeks ago...

Jill, you owe me for a new blouse now. Blouse plus Dr. Pepper out he nose don't mix. You are nuts, we have to party together some time!!

[Calder Smith]

My wife blew the ->-bleeped-<- in her BMW two weeks ago...

Lucky her?

[Jill F]

Lucky her?

I don't think so.  It cost $7500 to fix. 

[Calder Smith]

I don't think so.  It cost $7500 to fix. 

Is it the joke, or do I just have a dirty mind?

[Miss_Bungle1991]

Is it the joke, or do I just have a dirty mind?

You just have a dirty mind.

*Goes back to writing anthro porn*

[lovelessheart]

i dont care for that word. its a car part anyway. i only feel someone is trans anything if they have not achieved what they believe is themselves. trans means crossing over or switching.. well when your finished.. you just are you. for me female.

[Tori]

i dont care for that word. its a car part anyway. i only feel someone is trans anything if they have not achieved what they believe is themselves. trans means crossing over or switching.. well when your finished.. you just are you. for me female.

Indeed, trans is a prefix meaning changing from one state of being to another, be that radio and car transmissions, or ->-bleeped-<-, or transsexuals... or Trans-Atlamtic flights, or a Trans Am... OK I am done for now.

[Rachel]

I do not use slurs and I do not want others using slurs around me.

I am exposed to slurs every day. Some are directed toward me. "->-bleeped-<- stories" with negative consequences have been said at the lunch table by an individual several times and I believe it is directed toward me. I just sit there. I identify with some of the stories and it sucks and even though I will out myself, next time I will put a stop to it.

I have heard ->-bleeped-<- used to me by another in an non-offensive way (not used as a slur), in private, and I do not take offense. However, when he uses the word it gets my attention. I thought about pointing out the word is derogatory. It is used in conversation by him when he is discussing his relative and another mutual friend he knows as trans*. I have a very close relationship with this person and I have no secrets from him. I have known him for 26 years.

If the word is used as a slur then I do not like it. If it is used by an ally or another trans I know then I do not take offense if it is used as a neutral descriptor.  However, in the future I will inform then of the nature of the word.