choosing(kind of long)

[dovahking]

So my Vday was cool, I got to hang with friends and go out on the town after the snow melted. I also got a chance to Skype this guy im really close to in South Carolina, I've been wary of calling it a relationship seeing as how we've never met face to face except Skype. We've had issues, mostly regarding the distance,since im in another state, lack of communication too, he's more of the partier type.

I've been told by my friends he's not worth it, and I should find somebody closer, the only thing is that I don't go out to meet people, I always end up meeting people online that then reject me for being trans, the few times I've gone out people didn't even know trans guys existed, then it either turns into a painful questionnaire about my sex life, or "you're cute but no". The guy up north is the only one I've come across not bothered by my physical self :/,but at the same time I dislike LDR, but at the same time terrified of really going out ><,kind of stuck..

[kaiju]

Can't help on the sex life, asexual and all, but I'm in a LDR(and also not keen on going out, etc) and it's working out alright. I'm personally okay with the distance. Not thrilled by it, but if you arrange ways to meet up, it's nice. If you think you're not going to be able to handle a long distance relationship, don't force it. While you may believe people won't like you because you're trans, you'll find that there are some really nice people out there who like you for you, regardless of what your body is like at the moment. You might want to find more people who share your feelings, people who aren't super extroverted and who won't force you into things you're uncomfortable with. This guy may be nice, you two might have a decent relationship, but you need to think about your needs in the long run. If it's going to be nothing but stress on your end, don't do it.

[overdrive]

Maybe I'm wrong but it almost sounds like you're settling for this guy just because he accepts you for being trans and you have had bad luck with others doing the same. If that is the case then move on, no need to settle. If you are truly into this guy and the only issue is the LDR, then its more a matter of can you trust him because trust is the most important thing in a relationship and even more important in a LDR.

[invisiblemonsters]

Maybe I'm wrong but it almost sounds like you're settling for this guy just because he accepts you for being trans and you have had bad luck with others doing the same. If that is the case then move on, no need to settle. If you are truly into this guy and the only issue is the LDR, then its more a matter of can you trust him because trust is the most important thing in a relationship and even more important in a LDR.

i'm gonna agree with this for the most part. don't settle because someone accepts you're trans because a lot of people will and you can meet someone anywhere, even if you don't go out a lot. distance is an issue in any relationship whether you're trans or not. however, i was in a LDR for 6 years and it worked out just fine. trust and communication is a big thing and if you let what your friends say get to you, that or any relationship will be doomed. you got to learn from your own mistakes of course and your friends can give you caution and maybe you can find someone closer but don't let your friends make you feel as if your relationship isn't "real" or something because it's long distance.

in the end it's your choice and your decisions only affect you and how happy you are, etc. your friends should understand that and even if it doesn't work out , they should be there for you.