is it common to be jealous

[RosieD]

I know one trans woman who doesn't do jealousy. She doesn't do envy either. She does do admiration but that is about it.

Rosie.

[kira21 ♡♡♡]

Well, I can't speak for the others but I am very jealous of lots of cis girls and some of the girls on this board who have what I will never have and want so badly. You just do what you know you should and tell yourself it doesn't matter and that its better to move past it. Stings though. but you know... yolo.

[Monique]

thank you for everything you all said to me about being envy. I need to realize that I am envy right now because im not fully transitioned into a full woman yet but I need to learn that not to be envy to anyone after I do transition even though I'm sure those feelings will go away afterwards.

[kira21 ♡♡♡]

Don't be so sure that they will go away by themselves,  u will have to keep working on it.

[Monique]

thanks for the good advice, I will defiantly make sure that I always work on it after I transition since I probably will since its common so I will make sure that I keep on it so I can be happy and live a full life as myself, im still in pre transition with everything except therapy which I just started a week ago its been easier since the state I now live in is much easier to find therapists and others, but thank you for the advice I'm very appreciative of it.

[anais]

thank you for everything you all said to me about being envy. I need to realize that I am envy right now because im not fully transitioned into a full woman yet but I need to learn that not to be envy to anyone after I do transition even though I'm sure those feelings will go away afterwards.

I think even cis women are jealous of other beautiful women.

[930310]

I think even cis women are jealous of other beautiful women.

I would like to expand that to that everyone is jealous of someone else. Who here hasn't felt jealous that someone has something you want but can't have etc.?

[Monique]

that's true, my friend just got a ps4 so I guess I'm a lil jealous at that lol, I know its way off topic but its true.

[FalseHybridPrincess]

there are two kinds of jealously

the good one and the bad one

the good one goes kinda like this
"oh look at that cis girl she is so amazing and beautiful I wish I was like her "

and the bad one
"hm look at this cis girl why did she get to be like that I didnt scr*w that b*tch I hate her"

[Monique]

the envy or jealousy is the good one, not the bad one I would never say that to anyone, everyone deserves to be treated like they should be. I do feel like that how you said the good one but the bad one I would never say to anyone that is the worst kind of jealousy

[mandonlym]

To be completely honest I am totally not socialized this way. Maybe it's because I grew up with three super-attractive sisters and mom and I've just always felt happy and proud to be in their presence. When I transitioned I was pretty much just fully accepted as one of them. So when I see beautiful women, my instinct is not to be jealous but to befriend and socialize with them.

EDIT: The only time I *do* get jealous is when one of my friends ends up sleeping with someone I'm interested in. But it passes...

[Monique]

it was difficult for me since my mother didn't really understand what was going on with me, she thought I was just depressed all those years when I was drinking, but at the time she had no idea that I felt like a woman inside even when I was growing up. I do agree that I was depressed for a few years I tried to kill myself once by drinking to the point that I had alcohol poisoning just because I felt so different, I never felt normal. im mostly just usually jealous because how I feel like inside and how I want to be one of them one day which I am doing with going to therapy.

[Ltl89]

Yes, but keep in mind that girl your jealous of is probably jealous of someone else herself.  Everyone gets jealous from time to time, but what matters is where you take it.  For example when one's personal envy of someone else leads to anger or disgust towards that person, it really starts to cross a line.  Don't be like that.  If anything be inspired by someone you admire.  And remember no woman is perfect and very few of us will ever feel that way regardless of how we look. 

[noleen111]

I was looked at woman with envy before I started transitioning..

They got to wear some many different styles of clothes, especially wearing a dress and got to make themselves pretty.. and got to wear high heel boots.

also they got to grow breasts.. I really wanted to wear a bra... Funny I was 19 the first time I wore one... and I started dressing at 14.. and girls got to wear earrings.. (I know guys can do this too.. but my father was a very conservative man, and he did not allow me to get my ears pierced..) He never approved of my transition and he passed away never accepting his daughter. I now have 3 holes in each ear.

Also i had envy that girls got to wear pantyhose and thongs... Pantyhose was the first piece of female clothing I ever wore at the age of 14.

Now I am a post-op transgender.. and I have no envy towards women.. as I get to do all those things now and I got grow breasts.. I am very happy as a woman.. and embrace my femininity every way I can.

[Shantel]

Now I am a post-op transgender.. and I have no envy towards women.. as I get to do all those things now and I got grow breasts.. I am very happy as a woman.. and embrace my femininity every way I can.

Yeah it common to be jealous.....OMG Noleen those legs!  Being jealous never goes away, there's always someone with prettier this or that than what you have and it's totally female to be envious of another woman's attributes.

[Monique]

I agree with you noleen, I felt the same way, I wore a womans bathing suit to school when I was 15 and I loved it, I didn't try pantyhose til I was in my 20s and I start wearing womans clothing underneath my clothes after I came out to my parents and they accepted it. I still get envy but I think since ive been talking on here that its making me control my envy feelings towards others and its getting easier for me to go out now, im stil pre transition so I still have a way to go also my dad doesn't like the name Lavinia but im still keeping it I like it.

[RosieD]

it's totally female to be envious of another woman's attributes.

I don't know if it is a left hand side of the pond thing or not but over here it is not a "totally female" thing to be envious. At least not according to my cis-gendered partner, cis-gendered neighbour and cis-gendered sisters.

Jealousy and envy are both dead-ends. You will never be the person you are envious of and they may even hate the thing you are getting all green-eyed over. Why waste the energy?

Rosie

[Shantel]

I don't know if it is a left hand side of the pond thing or not but over here it is not a "totally female" thing to be envious. At least not according to my cis-gendered partner, cis-gendered neighbour and cis-gendered sisters.

Jealousy and envy are both dead-ends. You will never be the person you are envious of and they may even hate the thing you are getting all green-eyed over. Why waste the energy?

Rosie

Well Rosie, all I can say is that you and your immediate friends have a lot of good sense not wasting your time with petty stuff.

[RosieD]

Well Rosie, all I can say is that you and your immediate friends have a lot of good sense not wasting your time with petty stuff.

Sorry Auntie Shan, I was trying really hard to phrase things so I didn't come across as a supercilious whatnot but I probably failed.  I really am not trying to lecture anyone but would really like to know...why jealously or envy? What is the point?

Rosie

[930310]

Sorry Auntie Shan, I was trying really hard to phrase things so I didn't come across as a supercilious whatnot but I probably failed.  I really am not trying to lecture anyone but would really like to know...why jealously or envy? What is the point?

Rosie

I personally believe that jealousy and envy are an evolutional trait. It has encouraged our species to work harder and achieve better and better results. If everybody was happy about how things was we would maybe still be strolling around on the african savannah.