I started thinking about something today. How much of what we feel is actually the way we feel and how much is just enforced into our brains because "that's how trans people feel" and it's talked about so much and so repetitively on support sites and in support groups that we start to think "I'm trans, so I should feel that way" until it becomes part of our actual feelings. I hope I'm making sense. I'm just having trouble differentiating what I actually want and what I've adopted to want because it's the trans thing to want. I know, "there are as many ways to be trans as there are trans people" and all that, but it's part of our nature to want to belong and I'm sure that has some influence in this situation. I personally have a strong belief that you should be yourself and not try to change for others and have a desire to actually stand out rather than blend in and I feel that I'm still affected by this myself. So I can only imagine the effect it has on those that so badly want to just blend in. How much of their personality and belief system is truly who they are and how much is invented to blend in and so ingrained that they don't even remember that they only are thinking like that because those around them think like that.
Anyways, I hope this isn't offensive to anyone and I apologize for the run-on sentences. I hope what I'm saying made sense and has come across as intended.
