Why do/did you want T?

[JayDawg]

I'm looking for your reasons for WHY you want to be on T. I'm still mulling it over and want to see some of your reasons for getting it.

My personal goal is top surgery above all, so I can look at my very own nice MAN chest.

My pro-T items: More muscles, more masculine appearance. DO WANT.

My con-T items: Body and facial hair, enlarged clitoris. I've never liked body or facial hair on men (or women, for that matter), so it kind of turns me off when I picture it on my own self.

Ok, what were your reasons for going on it (or why you're looking forward to it)?

[Frank]

For some reason I had a brain fart and was like "Uh. I don't really know why."

I'm very uncomfortable with thin forearms and lack of muscle in general, even though I tend to be strong. Today was my third shot, but I already feel the effects as far as stamina and that is a godsend for my sanity.

Hair. I like it. I'm a bear ->-bleeped-<-, and apparently am going to be just as hairy. Hopefully minus a carpet back though.

Deeper voice. My voice drove me nuts, I could only sing tenor. Now I can generally keep up with most male singers without annoyingly cutting off.

I don't mind if my hair recedes. I shave it all off anyway.

Overall, even though not having been on it that long, I'm very happy with it and can't wait to see further changes. Oh, one more thing. Less suicidal thoughts. Phew.

[JayDawg]

Frank, I totally forgot about voice! Yes, I'd like mine deeper, too. It's already fairly low from being a smoker; I sometimes get "sir" on the phone.

[AdamMLP]

I can't really think of anything I don't want, other than the increased risk to some medical issues, but even then it'll just put me on par with cis males, so what will be will be w what should of been.

Body hair, hairline, muscle, body fat distribution, facial hair, voice, general masculinisation, less of an ability to cry, no more sharks... All of it. It was reading about the effects of T and wanting all of them that made me research trans men and then everything clicked into place.

For a while lower growth was a big no for me, but after a while I warmed up to it, and want it now. I think it was just the shock of knowing my body could be changed so obviously and quickly in that department. And that its not 100% here nor there.

[Kreuzfidel]

I'm looking for your reasons for WHY you want to be on T. I'm still mulling it over and want to see some of your reasons for getting it.

....

Ok, what were your reasons for going on it (or why you're looking forward to it)?

Well, primarily because I'm a man and cismen have testosterone naturally in their bodies. 


"Reaons" - I know there are people here who don't identify as transsexuals, but most of us do and I think that the aforementioned reason is going to be the most common.

However, specific things that T can do which are necessary for my happiness in my own body:


~Facial/body hair
~Musculature/ability to gain muscle quicker
~Deeper voice
~Fat redistribution
~Increase in libido
~Penis growth
~Etc.

But above all - it's a hormone that I should have been born creating in the appropriate quantities via testicles but wasn't - hence I need to take it - it's not a simple "want".

[yaka]

Pretty much all the effects of testosterone which have been mentioned are what I want. Increased health issues aside, the only downside is increase in abdominal fat (something people of my ethnicity find almost impossible to eliminate XD).

Ultimately, I just feel GOOD on testosterone. No drugs or antidepressants could compare to what T has done for me in terms of my happiness.

[FTMDiaries]

Same as pretty much everyone else who has commented. I could sum it up by saying that I wanted to start T so that I could pass better, but to be more specific I wanted certain benefits in the following order:

• Deeper voice
• Increased musculature
• Facial hair
• Facial bone structure
• Increased libido
• The presence of The Little Guy 
• Redistribution of body fat, but particularly a reduction in my hip size
• Increased body hair

This month marks seven months on T for me. In that time, I have experienced all of the above, and whilst there is still a way to go, I'm feeling much happier within my own skin.

As an added bonus, I no longer feel as anxious as before. I used to spend my days in a perpetual state of heightened anxiety; whether that was due to hormones or simply the stress of being trans* I can't say for sure. But I noticed after two or three months on T that things which would previously make me extremely anxious simply didn't bother me any more. Like Yaka, I've not felt like I need anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds for several months now.

[Edge]

What Kreuzfidel said about it being something I wish my body made itself. At least with T injections, I get it the right hormone in some way.

Effects I wanted pre-T and still want: Dysphoria. I want to be able to look male someday. I'm sick of looking female and being called "she" everywhere I go. I hated my voice so much, I wanted to rip my vocal chords out. I seriously sounded like a chipmunk. I hate how effeminate my face is. I want male skin texture (a weird thing to add, I know, but I want it). My curves bug the heck out of me. Etc.

Effects I realized post-T: My brain is supposed to run on testosterone. It works better this way. I feel more comfortable (albeit still impatiently dysphoric).

[CursedFireDean]

The biggest reason I want T is so others will view me as male. My social anxiety is all stemming from the fact that I don't pass well.

deeper voice- been extremely dysphoric about this for the longest time
no more shark week- most girls don't even like this thing, why would I?
body hair (specifically armpits, legs, and stomach)- My thin hairs make me sad to look at, they're so unnoticeable
facial hair (I didn't want this at first, but now I do)- I don't know exactly why I like this
changing hairline- hairline stops me from getting the haircuts I like
body fat redistribution away from hips/butt- butt is a big reason I hate clothes shopping- it's so painfully obviously a female butt
downstairs growth- yay my own penis-like body part

[Whynaut]

I want T to help people see me the way I see myself. I struggled with years of eating disorders in the past, which took therapy, doctors, and a nutritionist to finally get me "cured" (it will probably never fully leave my mind), and during that time I did a lot of mental work to accept my body. I never mentioned my transgender status or feelings, but the work to accept my body at a healthy weight has done a lot for helping me accept my body in general, giving me less dysphoria.

The things I hate about my body are my breasts and my voice. I want to take T to lower my voice. I have never liked speaking because I have always hated my voice and it would be nice to not feel self-conscious every time I open my mouth. Having things like more muscle mass and potential facial hair would be the cherry on top. I love the energy and stamina spike. I always had to sleep more than my roommates (both cis guys) and now I can keep up with them much easier.

The only things I'm not too excited about are things like extreme amounts of hair (I do want it in some places) or balding. Being a small guy, I look even smaller without hair on my head.

[Ryan55]

basically to pass as male, to deepen my voice and feel like a guy, to be me finally, the hair, everything is worth it to me. Also hate my boobs too, honestly I have more disphoria about the boobs then I do the bottom half, I think cause people can see the top half (binders help, but when you don't wear them 24/7 it can suck, be nice to walk around with no shirt on also.

[Whynaut]

basically to pass as male, to deepen my voice and feel like a guy, to be me finally, the hair, everything is worth it to me. Also hate my boobs too, honestly I have more disphoria about the boobs then I do the bottom half, I think cause people can see the top half (binders help, but when you don't wear them 24/7 it can suck, be nice to walk around with no shirt on also.

I absolutely can't wait for this. And I agree with you -- the boobs are the worst. They are uncomfortable, smushing them down is painful, and they are so obviously female. Ugh. Before even coming out to myself as trans I was looking up ways to have them removed and even found myself wishing for breast cancer so doctors would just take them away.

[Adam (birkin)]

I just know I'm supposed to be male-bodied. It's kind of difficult to achieve that without T. I was a tiny bit apprehensive about the change in genitals, as I can't personally view them as male, so I worried it would just accentuate what I already hated. Fortunately there has been very little change. I wasn't sure about body hair...I wanted it to grow as most men can grow some degree of body hair, but I worried it would itch. It only does sometimes and that's because I'm a walking rug. Lol.

[Frank]

I absolutely can't wait for this. And I agree with you -- the boobs are the worst. They are uncomfortable, smushing them down is painful, and they are so obviously female. Ugh. Before even coming out to myself as trans I was looking up ways to have them removed and even found myself wishing for breast cancer so doctors would just take them away.

Oh god yes. I die a little inside every time I see my dad walking around, and he's allowed to do that without being misgendered and he has solid A cups. Not that I want any cups at all, but still.

Why the heck do boobs have to be so soft? If I even touch the upper edges I immediately start crashing.

[FindingJames]

Reasons I want to start T (in no particular order):
1. Deeper voice
2. Facial hair
3. Arm and leg hair
4. Redistribution of fat
5. Increased muscle

Things I'm not looking forward to:
1. Acne
I don't care about how acne looks to be honest, I just don't want it to hurt any worse than the acne I currently have because it really sucks.
2. Weird body hair
My dad is kind of hairy, but especially my brother. My brother has weird patches of thick, black hair on his upper arms and on his back. He also has an extremely hairy lower back and butt. I really hope I don't get it as bad as him because that would suck.

[Arch]

Honestly, I got to the point where the unwanted effects didn't matter. I had to have T. My only option seemed to be suicide although I worried that I would chicken out and just have some kind of major breakdown and wind up in a mental hospital for the rest of my life.

In the end, some of the unwanted effects (or effects I was unsure of) are the ones I treasure (change in body scent, for example) or the ones I crave more of (I want more body hair, and I wish my junk were bigger).

[TRyan]

I wanted to go on T so my outside would reflect who I am on the inside--deeper voice, more muscle mass (and more strength), facial hair, grounded.

With my first injection of T I felt so calm and grounded it was amazing. I've since had some unwanted side effects but feel similar to what Arch expressed above.  I'm hoping I won't have to go off it because of the side effects.  I'm only six weeks in and can't imagine going back.

Urelated to T, I so want to lose the breasts. They've been these foreign objects that I've carried around since puberty. Too bad I couldn't sell them.

[LordKAT]

This may seem absurd. I don't/didn't want T, I want to have a body that conforms to what my mind sees. T is just a step in the right direction.

[sbx]

This may seem absurd. I don't/didn't want T, I want to have a body that conforms to what my mind sees. T is just a step in the right direction.

I think I know what you mean. For me, taking testosterone wasn't so much something I wanted so much as something I needed. I absolutely needed to go through puberty the right way so I could go on living my life. Even the negative effects, like acne or hairloss, are just something I've accepted as part of being male.

[LordKAT]

That is pretty much it. It is just a method to correct what went wrong somewhere.