Life Post Transition Curiosity

[Jasmine96]

I'm curious, how much better is life like on the other side of transitioning? Ive always imagined it as some beautiful and amazing world where colors are brighter and food tastes better but its hard to get a real image without too much info on life post transition. So my questions are

Are you happy now after your transition?

Are you confident in your appearance?

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

Do you actually teal like your preferred gender?

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle.

[Jessica Merriman]

A very BIG YES to all your questions! Life has a whole new meaning with different discoveries every day. I was telling my Therapist today how most of the time I actually forget I am Trans. After the newness wears off of presenting in public it just seems normal and comfortable. The sky didn't fall, the world didn't end (well, for "HIM" it did) and acceptance of me has been better than I ever dreamed it would be. I feel 15 -20 years younger, health issue's such as depression, high blood pressure even high blood sugar are gone. Before transition I was miserable and on 12 daily meds. I have been off of all of them for a year now. I only take HRT related meds now. I go to sleep easy and sleep all night waking refreshed and good to go. I even have friends now that WANT to be around me and not AVOID me anymore. I think the struggle was hard, but the payoff is more than I ever thought possible. I love life now and live every day instead of just existing. 

[Joanna Dark]

I feel like this outsider here most times since I'm not having any troubles other than stuff that could happen to anyone, cis or trans, and yes my life is a bazillion times better, looking in the mirror isn't so hard (in fact, my ex-lover said all I need is a mirror, some makeup and a camera and you could put me in a room for days and I'd come out smiling),  I don't sweat and I awlays cry so no difference there. And I find it hard to even identify as male if not impossible and feel like I become even more femme as time passes and I get used to my new role and shed off my old one. So, yeah, I feel completely female rather than some half-and-half person though this girl thought I was a lesbian for some reason but that's prolly cause my ex was trying to bang her and i didn't want to ruin it for him so I played dykey dyke. I look the part any way.

What I don't like: constantly needing new bras. Ugh. They're expensive and my underbust keeps shrinking and bust keeps growing. Every bra I have now feels way to tight but it could be the Prometrium, making me feel fuller. I look fuller. I feel like I'm all boobs and legs. I've always had a weird, girly shape but I did yoga too and I feel all sore and busty and big (in the bad way) at the same time.

[kelly_aus]

Are you happy now after your transition?

Yes, I'm happy. I think that's as much about having learnt to love myself..

Are you confident in your appearance?

Yeah, pretty much.. I have a few things I'd like to change, but overall, I'm fairly confident.

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

I really didn't find transition to be all that hard.. Coming out certainly has some fear attached, but I got over that by coming out.. 

Do you actually teal like your preferred gender?

I guess so.. I've never really pondered 'what it feels like' to be either gender - I just know how I feel.

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

It's made some things easier and others not so easy.. A case of swings and roundabouts.

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

I don't want to be any gender, I'm a woman.. I've always been one, regardless of my external presentation.

Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle.

Life is life.. I do all the usual things.. Work, play, pay bills, household chores, etc etc.. It's not some magical fairy land where unicorns fart glitter and rainbows. It's just life, except that now I live it as a woman, not being mistaken for a man.

[sad panda]

I'm curious, how much better is life like on the other side of transitioning? Ive always imagined it as some beautiful and amazing world where colors are brighter and food tastes better but its hard to get a real image without too much info on life post transition. So my questions are

Are you happy now after your transition?

Nope

Are you confident in your appearance?

No

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

Def not

Do you actually teal like your preferred gender?

Sort of

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

No... harder

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

Yeah, but I don't personally

Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle.

[eli77]

I'm 3 years post-op/post-transition.

Are you happy now after your transition?

I don't really think of "happy" as being a state you are perpetually in. Life is life. There are ups and downs. Good things and bad. I am happy far more often than I was pre-transition.

Are you confident in your appearance?

Yes and no. I'm confident in the sense that my trans status is not visible. I am confident that I don't have to deal with that if I don't want to.

I'm not 100% at ease with my body. But I'm not sure there are many cis folk who are either. It is far better than it was.

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

Heh. Yes. No question.

Do you actually feel like your preferred gender?

I am female. I'm not sure what gender feels like.

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

Some things. My relationships with other people are much easier. But not everything. I tend to say that transitioning is trading one big problem for lots of little ones. Cause pre-transition you aren't really living, you are just stuck in stasis with this huge thing looming over you. But once you fix that, you still have to deal with life.

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

I can't really answer this one. I just feel like me.

Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle.

I'm a bit of a skeptic and a realist, so I think the post-transition glow wore off fastish for me. But I don't think anyone should really go in thinking it will solve all your problems. Transition solves one problem. It was kind of a big problem though. So ya, things are much better now.

[Carrie Liz]

Are you happy now after your transition?

Definitely. I still have my little personal dysphoric breakdowns now and then, but I've found that as a whole I am WAY happier. I relate to people better, my mind actually feels like it's working right, and most importantly of all, I'm happy with the person I see in the mirror. (Or at least way happier than I used to be.) No, it's not perfect. Life goes on, and there's still the same little struggles as there ever were. But transition has allowed me to live my life and confront those little struggles without depression and dysphoria constantly getting in the way and making me feel bad about myself.

Are you confident in your appearance?

On and off. It is taking my mind a LONG time to adjust. I'm still constantly having times where I start freaking out about how unfeminine I am, only to look in the mirror and realize "okay, it's not as bad as I thought." I seem to constantly bounce back and forth between "OMG, I look great today and I'm totally passing and I totally love myself" to "OMG I'm hideous and unfeminine and I hate all of these male features that I have, and I hate myself!" (Disclaimer: I've only been full-time for about a week, so this is still VERY new to me.)

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

YES!!!

Do you actually teal like your preferred gender?

Not yet, but again, I'm new, so I still haven't really been socialized into the role yet, and thus haven't really internalized it yet. I'm working on it. I sure am happy on the days where I do feel like it, though.

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

Yes, definitely. Having self-confidence where before I had none has seriously made me into a better person. Talking with people is easier, making friends is easier, and many other things that used to be hindered by dysphoria and hindered by my lack of a positive self-image are slowly getting better. Basically that's what I'd say the big part of transition is. No, it does not solve all of your problems. But it does remove a huge road block, allowing you to at least be able to function on the same level as others do because you're not constantly being knocked down by dysphoria and self-hatred anymore.

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

I don't personally think so, just because I don't fit the typical trans narrative of having known that I was a girl since I was like 5. So to me, I'll probably always feel like a bit of a second-class woman since I definitely was socialized as male pretty successfully for the first 11 years of my life or so, and don't feel like my femininity is completely natural and effortless. Issues with still not accepting yourself as your identity gender post-transition are pretty common. But for many, for most actually, I'd say yes it is definitely possible. A majority of trans people transition, re-assimilate, get on with their lives, and that's basically it, they spend the rest of their lives blending in and basically being hardly any different from a cis person of that same gender.

Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle.

To be honest? Kind of boring. But I like it that way. Before transition, my life was a constant battle of self-loathing, feeling like I lacked something that every single other person in the world had, and constantly being distracted by wishing that I was a girl. Where now, for the first time ever, I feel normal. I feel like I'm able to live my life as myself and actually be happy with that self. That's the real difference... "gender dysphoria" has been replaced with "gender euphoria," where I'm treated in a way that makes me feel validated and happy about myself, instead of feeling wrong and invalidated. It's really not some magical thing where it's all sunshine and rainbows all the time, though. To me, it really was like the treatment to a medical disorder, where I was sick before, but the disease has now been treated and I'm healthy again. I will admit that having been "sick" for all of those years has made that feeling of being healthy that much sweeter, that much more amazing, but in the end, it really is just a normal boring life afterward.

[Jill F]

I'm curious, how much better is life like on the other side of transitioning? Ive always imagined it as some beautiful and amazing world where colors are brighter and food tastes better but its hard to get a real image without too much info on life post transition. So my questions are

You know, colors ARE brighter and food does taste better.  It's like parts of my brain that were previously dark have been illuminated by the E.

Are you happy now after your transition? Definitely.  I didn't know what happy was before.
Are you confident in your appearance? Enough to go out every day and face the world.  I get it. I'm a work in progress.
Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?  Yes
Do you actually teal like your preferred gender? No, but I feel like a woman 24/7.  And I do look good in teal.
Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier? Easier, no.  Fulfilling, yes.
Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be? I always felt like a girl.
Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle.  Knowing my life doesn't have to be unbearable now is amazeballs.

[suzifrommd]

Are you happy now after your transition?

Ecstatic. It's more than I ever dreamed it would be.

Are you confident in your appearance?

Yes. I always assumed I'd be one of the transgirls that gets clocked immediately, but I rarely get read. I love the way I look.

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

Not as much sweat as I thought, and very few tears. If there were 10x as many troubles, it would still be worth it.

Do you actually feel like your preferred gender?

No. I feel like a man in disguise. I wish I could feel like a woman, but I just don't. Doesn't really matter. My GT says what's important is, am I getting what I wanted out of this, to which the answer is yes, yes, yes.

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

It's much easier to socialize with women. I never really felt satisfied with the kind of friendships men have, but approaching women as a married male was problematic. Now women come up to me at parties and social occasions.

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

I think it helps if you are one of those trans people who "always knew" they were the opposite gender. That's unfortunately not me.

I don't really care. I'm happy being me. I'm happy being seen as and living as a woman. I couldn't be happier with my transition.

[Northern Jane]

Coming up on 40 years post in 2 weeks

>> Are you happy now after your transition?

EXTREMELY!

>> Are you confident in your appearance?

Totally! Even in jeans and a dirty T doing supposed "guy stuff" - 100% When 'dressed up and looking girly, I not only pass but frequently get compliments on being very attractive.

>> Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

Unequivocally YES! I would have died 40 years ago if I hadn't  found SRS and transitioned.

>> Do you actually teal like your preferred gender?

Totally, 100%, all the time. I couldn't feel more natural if I had been born this way, been pregnant, and nursed babies.

>> Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

It makes it easier for ME to deal with LIFE but it meant facing discrimination most of my life, just like every other woman. Easier? A bit yes and a bit no.

>> Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

Absolutely! But you have to leave EVERYTHING about your old life behind.

[Beverly]

Are you happy now after your transition? - Yes

Are you confident in your appearance? - Yes

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears? - Yes

Do you actually teal like your preferred gender? -  I feel like me

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier? - No. Transitioning solved ONE problem for me.

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be? - I feel like me

Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle. - Life is better. I feel like me. I no longer feel 'odd' or like a misfit. I have lost the hammers in my head, the sense of not being right and the need to repress my feelings and second guess everything I thought or did. Now I am just myself.

[kathyk]

My view of transition has changed dramatically over the last two years, and it doesn't seem that mine will ever be truly complete.  But I guess I can consider it complete at a point where I no longer have any concern about my body, and my mind no longer takes a random wandering into questions about my appearance. 

Here's an example of how wonderful transition can run into a rough day once in a while, and with those days I become fully aware of the status of my incomplete life.  Anyway, everything has been great with my appearance (and being ma'am'd) for the last few months, then yesterday I was Sir'd by three people because I had ventured out without makeup while wearing super androgynous clothing.  It reminded me of how far I have to go.  And with that reminder I had to reassess my morning routine to make sure I'm not somehow "outing myself".

But I'm hoping to be approved for surgery this month, and that'll remove the one thing that brings me an unwanted reminder that something is wrong every day during this transition.  But the funny thing is that member is now just hiding the vagina that's really there.

[stephaniec]

the world is a lot better place for me

[Catherine Sarah]

Hi Jasmine,

I'm curious, how much better is life like on the other side of transitioning? Ive always imagined it as some beautiful and amazing world where colors are brighter and food tastes better but its hard to get a real image without too much info on life post transition. So my questions are

Take hold of your images; let your imagination run wild, and never let go. Then you'll have something to base an indescribable experience on.

Think about it this way. Try and describe weightlessness to me.

Are you happy now after your transition?

I was happy before; now I'm ecstatic.

Are you confident in your appearance?

Extremely confident. My appearance started as an inner journey to authenticity.  It now radiates from the inside, out.

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

If you mean the entire cost. The loss of everything false I had known and worked for. The loss of a 30+ year marriage, children, family. Property, possessions. The one word answer is unequivocally - absolutely.

More than I could have imagined. What I've gained from paying that price, is unimaginably indescribable.

Do you actually feel like your preferred gender?

Always have.

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

Absolutely. I now no longer have to lie about a facade that should never have been, or remember what lie I told you last week/month/year about something. Being authentic makes life just that much easier and so uncomplicated.

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

No body ever wants to be a gender. You either are, or you aren't. And that can mean male, female or somewhere in between. If you're prepared to face the responsibility of being totally honest with yourself and stop the lies and denial, then yes, it is very possible.

Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle.

That; nobody can tell you. You have to experience it for yourself. There is an unmitigated, non transferrable state you enter, once there is congruency between mind, body, soul and spirit; that defies description. You, and you alone, have to experience that one.

I wish you expediency in embracing and enjoying what will become an unimaginable reality.

Huggs
Catherine

[Cindy]

I'm curious, how much better is life like on the other side of transitioning? Ive always imagined it as some beautiful and amazing world where colors are brighter and food tastes better but its hard to get a real image without too much info on life post transition. So my questions are

Are you happy now after your transition?

Totally, well will be completely after the op, and maybe a boob job as well.

Are you confident in your appearance?

Very, I'm considered an attractive woman by everyone who matters to me.

Was it all really worth all the sweat and tears?

Very few sweat and tears, they were before transition

Do you actually teal like your preferred gender?

Always have done, I was born female, I now live and I'm accepted as female.

Does transitioning make other aspects of your life easier?

Completely, I'm normal and happy and very confident.

Is it possible to feel completely like the gender you want to be?

See above, I was and do, now I'm almost complete

Its just curiosity but I'd love to know what life is like after this long struggle.

Life is what you make of it. I have overcome many things in my life. I have always accepted the challenges of life and even though I have struggled and been in situations no man or woman should experience I always accepted that I control my destiny. Now I am a powerful woman and one of the leading trans*women in my society, I face the challenges that present in these situations with hard work and joy.

I'm happy. In fact I'm damn awesome

[Jenna Marie]

I'm in a hurry and can't type much, but YES it was all worth it. I feel 100% like a woman now, and don't often think about being trans when I'm not hanging out with trans people or talking about trans issues. I don't think it made my life easier in any way except that now I don't feel like I'm carrying the ten-ton weight of my gender issues around, but that's still something.

Still not confident in my appearance, but I have a lot of cis girlfriends who say that's just part of being a woman in this society, so I dunno. I'm a lot happier with how I look than I was before, anyway.

Basically, life post-transition for me has been... normal. Blissfully, perfectly ordinary. No more "static" in my head, no more dysphoria, no more constant depression. Transition itself was exciting, but I'm not really an exciting person - I've been delighted to settle back into being a totally ordinary woman who blends in with the rest of the women in a crowd.

(I am looking for a new job, which might make transition turn into a headache for me temporarily - they run background checks - but hopefully it'll be a blip.)