I'm going to try and sum this up the best I can.
I've been with the same company for almost 9 months now and I love it. I love my boss and my coworkers in the department I work in. I work for a company that has several smaller departments within it, so there are a lot of different managers and supervisors doing different things. When I first started working there I had a minor issue with HR because my license didn't say male on it. I was told to use the single stall restrooms until I was legally considered male. I've never had a problem with that, I actually prefer it because the men's rooms are disgusting. Sometimes though I do use the men's rooms because there are always lines in the single restrooms, people using their phones forever, etc. I've had HR updated with my male license since a month after I started working there, so, since August. Yesterday I get called into the office and asked by a member of HR if I had "completed the process" because it "just popped in her head" that we talked back in July and she never heard anymore about whether or not my "process" was completed and she had been made aware of me using the men's. I felt insulted because I felt like she was trying to word her way around asking if I've had bottom surgery, so I just answered yes, I'm legally considered male, I updated my things several months ago. Sure, fine, end of discussion, I'm allowed to use the men's. I felt really uncomfortable with that interaction so I told my boss (who I never actually told I was trans) and we had an hour long discussion about my life, she was very understanding and accepting, she mentioned hating HR because they're lazy and uneducated. So I get home and my roommate tells me what really happened. Long story short - she was in the breakroom and over heard a man loudly complaining about a woman using the men's room and asking what gives her the right. He even went so far as to tell the people what department I work for. He also rides my bus and said next time he sees me on the bus he's gonna have to teach me a lesson. She filed an official complaint about it with our boss. I'm obviously upset because I have no idea how he even knows, it can't be because I don't pass, because I do. I go into work this morning and try to have a discussion with HR again about how they handled the situation. I was not able to get a word in otherwise and the woman kept saying they "took care of it" and they "don't tolerate that behavior" and she even told me one of the owners of the company had to come talk to the man and everyone involved and if it happened again they would lose their jobs. I asked if I could make a suggestion so I mentioned to her about how the employee harassment seminar doesn't cover trans issues, but the supervisor/manager one does, and I think that should be changed. She argued with me for a few minutes about how it is covered, but I told her that when I went to one I got really upset that there were no trans issues covered, she wouldn't listen. She also told me that basically my roommate lied to me about what she heard. She also told me we all just needed to get over it and move on. I told my best friend what happened in there and she told me that all of the owners of the company were out because it was one of their birthdays. It's a family owned business and she works in the same office as them so she knows these things. So basically HR lied about that. I ended up finding out who the guy was and found out he's one of the managers, which explains why he didn't get fired. I've also never spoken to him, even briefly.
I live in the state of Florida where it's legal to fire LGBT people for no reason, though my company has different policies, I think the state laws rule that out. I want to know what I should do about this situation. I'm embarrassed and sad over all of this because besides HR and this guy, I love the company. My job is perfect for me. My boss is amazing. I just don't want to pursue it further and get fired. I'm sorry this is so long but once I got started it was hard to stop and I felt I should cover everything.
