What I fear continuing this path is that I may actually become really attractive

[Alainaluvsu]

I wasn't arguing passability hon, just what many people consider attractive

The girl on the left looks like she could kick my ***!! lol. She's beautiful in other areas though.

[Alainaluvsu]

The body needs Zinc, not just for hormone production (I know what you mean though, lots of people take ZMA or ZMC in bodybuilding). Yeah i've switched over to pork and mostly seafood, but a bit worried about mercury. I've tried running to slim down and tone, and i'm thinking of pilates and yoga as well.

Nice to see you back Alaina, you look very happy in your avatar photo

Zinc, calcium, protein, sodium ... things a lot of people wouldn't necessarily associate with femininity are all important on HRT. Our cells are changing, and we need to support them to do so as best we can. Especially vitamin D, calcium, sodium and protein. Never short yourself on vitamins because you think your muscles will atrophy. They'll atrophy healthily over time anyways, because testosterone is necessary for them to be bigger (as it's a growth hormone).

[Eva Marie]

Ok, just makin sure Being a vegan going through HRT is probably the last thing you'll wanna do. Your skin and hair will come out awful and your face will look gaunt. That's a big no no for MtFs. I've always said, hair is 60% of passing!

This is so true!

My endo wanted to start me on progesterone so I went on a diet to lose some weight first - I knew that I would be gaining weight and I wanted to lose it in the male places and gain it in the female places. I had whittled myself down to 160lbs from about 185lbs and then one day I looked in the mirror and I was shocked! My face looked awful! Gaunt, more wrinkles, etc. I knew that I was at the point that I needed to start putting weight back on. Right now I am eating like a horse and I'm afraid to step on the scales 

Speaking of losing strength - I've been on a transitioning dose of HRT since Oct 8th. I have lost most of my strength, and my upper arms are finally starting to shrink.

[Allyda]

I never had much of an upper body even before hrt. As for my diet, I eat mostly fish, Turkey/Chicken, eggs, in the meat department but stay away from red meat altogether. I will eat lean pork if available and I do drink 32 oz of milk per day. I take a Woman's multi vitamin, a Hair Skin, & Nails vitamin and if I notice my nails breaking I'll add Biotin to that. I have serious allergies when it comes to veggies so in this department I have to be careful. Fruits though I eat what I want, and that seems to maintain me at 5-5 & 117 lb's. Soda's a no no as I saw someone else had posted, and alot of water's a must. While I don't exercise I'm pretty active for my age and chronic pain issues, and do watch my caloric intake which I think goes a long way. 115 is my goal weight though & hopefully I'll be there soon.

As to the height issue, I'm from Southern California where tall very very very attractive women are common. I myself prefer/date women that are usually taller than I.

[Michelle G]

I'm just over 6' but I notice I'm not the tallest girl in town at all here in my California town, makes me feel much better

[Jenny07]

All I know is that my legs are leaning up nicely and the boob fairy is being generous as growth has been good so far.
Super soft skin now which feels very sensuous.

Long sinuous sexy legs and bouncing boobies.
I should be very afraid.

[DirtyFox]

\Wouldn't it be the most insane paradox to transition into a beautiful gal with all of its benefits, only to feel more like a man?

I'm a tomboy haha so manly(ish) is kinda in my character. Beautiful or not will not dictate my personality. Those who say otherwise about me just can't handle all this -gestures in front body-
In seriousness though, I am who I am. I'm friends with a girl who is drop-dead gorgeous but she swears like a sailor, rollerderby's like a madwoman and is tatted up. Not a very girly kinda lady. Attitude though counts for a lot.

[katiej]

All I know is that my legs are leaning up nicely and the boob fairy is being generous as growth has been good so far.
Super soft skin now which feels very sensuous.

Long sinuous sexy legs and bouncing boobies.
I should be very afraid.

Sounds like you're exactly what the OP was afraid of. 

Boob fairy -- HAHA!!

[Tori]

:c sorry I'm derailin'

Ban?

[mandonlym]

Dietwise I'm a vegetarian who cheats and has fish sometimes. I've cut out processed foods from my diet for the most part, which has been the biggest change in the last few months. I'm 5'6", 125 lbs. A fair amount of that is muscle mass from years and years of doing modern dance, yoga, pilates, etc. I really enjoy being athletic.

[Joanna Dark]

This is so true!

My endo wanted to start me on progesterone so I went on a diet to lose some weight first - I knew that I would be gaining weight and I wanted to lose it in the male places and gain it in the female places. I had whittled myself down to 160lbs from about 185lbs and then one day I looked in the mirror and I was shocked! My face looked awful! Gaunt, more wrinkles, etc. I knew that I was at the point that I needed to start putting weight back on. Right now I am eating like a horse and I'm afraid to step on the scales 

Speaking of losing strength - I've been on a transitioning dose of HRT since Oct 8th. I have lost most of my strength, and my upper arms are finally starting to shrink.

I've been on Prometrium for two months and I havent gained any weight. I do feel bloated in my lower abdomen and my upper body is/are like two giant boobs.I havent gained an inch where I wanted to: my hips. I'm still a 32D-27-34. Oh yeah, I weigh 120 lbs give or take a few pounds on any given day and I need to gain weight cause my face will look fuller. I've been on a consitent dose of HRT for seven months. And a lower not-so-consistent dose for six months before that.

[TheQuestion]

I fear the opposite

[Joanna Dark]

What if the changes you are seeing are pointing overwhelmingly in one direction? That (as conceited and subjective as it sounds) you really actually may become beautiful? "I'd take it! Why even think twice about it???" you say? Well you see...

... I'm not sure how to reconcile being beautiful with the andro-masculine personality that's already me.

Wouldn't it be the most insane paradox to transition into a beautiful gal with all of its benefits, only to feel more like a man?

Don't worry you've only been on HRT, for what, seven weeks? Not much time at all. Trust me, you will change. Not just physically, but in every way imaginable. Hormones ain't no joke. And, more than this, if you become a beautiful women, and I certainly hope you do, the way you are treated by society at large, men and women will have a massive effect on your personality and there is no way to avoid it. I've always been femme but I feel like transition has really moved me way to the femme side of the masculine-andro-femme continuum.

I have been called a beautiful woman prolly like 10 times this past week. It was a good week and ended with me moaning like a banshee (aww yeah). Anyhoo, the way I'm treated now is just so very different then ever. case in point: I smoke. I know I'm bad. Before, I couldn't get someone to give me a cigerette if my life depended on it, sometimes even if I offered a dollar. Now, I ask guys for a cigarette and I always offer to pay, and not one man hasn't given me one for free and called me some pet name. Mommy is my fave. The other day I ordered a slice and the woman gave me two, "just for you sweetie," she said.

There's simply no way to avoid the personality changes that will come as a result of transition. After all, you are in effect altering your entire body chemistry and reversing your role in society. The problem for many trans women is that not passing factor. people can say it doesn't matter all they want but for younger transtioners in particular who have had no or very little adult time as a male (like me) passing is important because if all that happens is you get called ->-bleeped-<- and clocked and mocked, well, I think that could lead to maladjustment and some serious issues. Trans women get a bad rap for the attitude. I hear this lots. When I disclose, people always say wow, you look so normal and you're so sweet most of them are clownish and bitter. NOT MY WORDS. Should I launch a defense for non-passing trans women. Yes. do I? No. I'm a wimp and want so desperately for people to like me.


(BTW, in reference to another thread, I consider transitioning at 29 still youngish, especially when the majority of that adult time (or all of it) was spent in a lesbian relationship dressing as a woman just without hormones. Others can diasagree, idc.)

[Evelyn K]

^^ Interesting about the "2 slices" thing You sure she wasn't trying to fatten you up out of simple jealousy?

I'm definitely leaning towards just achieving attractive fem-androgyny. That would be a hard achievement in its own right anyway. So I better not overshoot my expectations.

Besides, I still haven't come to terms with the possibility of actually growing breasts or not. I can try to stay flat like suggested in my 'me' avatar. Or maybe not. So all of this is still a fluid work in progress to say the least.

[AnneB]

Evelyn, really, if you look anything like your avatar, you are now, and will be, just more stunning.. just my opinion.. 

As for the multivitamins.. Are you taking a course of them, or something like (for us older girls) CentrumSilver, One A Day/women's?    I will likely start my HRT Friday, and wondering what would likely go along with them..

[Evelyn K]

Evelyn, really, if you look anything like your avatar, you are now, and will be, just more stunning.. just my opinion.. 

As for the multivitamins.. Are you taking a course of them, or something like (for us older girls) CentrumSilver, One A Day/women's?    I will likely start my HRT Friday, and wondering what would likely go along with them..

Here's crossing my fingers. I'm hoping so.

The only sups I take is biotin for my hair, a multivitamin every other few days, and kelp derived iodine which is good to stimulate anti-cancer cell apoptosis. I'm a big time cancer phobe.

[Evelyn K]

What if the changes you are seeing are pointing overwhelmingly in one direction? That (as conceited and subjective as it sounds) you really actually may become beautiful? "I'd take it! Why even think twice about it???" you say? Well you see...

... I'm not sure how to reconcile being beautiful with the andro-masculine personality that's already me.

Wouldn't it be the most insane paradox to transition into a beautiful gal with all of its benefits, only to feel more like a man?

(update)

Wow time really went by fast since my posting this 6 weeks ago. The reason why I'm returning to this thread was because for the first time since then, tonight, I cross dressed again.

My dark brown hair is longer down to my sternum, straight with a slight curl towards the ends. My face is really softening. My upper body musculature has decreased. The heels I wore before now fit looser, the back strap needs tightening. So my feet are definitely shrinking. And I have small feet! (7 mens!) I put on some lipstick, some eye liner and flipped my hair around my neck.

As I peered in the mirror - you now that "twilight zone" feeling you get when you cannot believe what you are seeing?

Yep.

Similar to what this person might be thinking.



I am so turning into a woman. My life is going to change. Like wow. I am sort of nervous, because things are gettin' real...this is now about 3-months in...

[noleen111]

I think confidence plays a big role here.

I remember when I started transitioning,, I was very worried will I pass .. especially when I went full time.. I dressed to be under the radar. As time went on and my body developed my confidence grew and I became dressing more girly in public.. now 3 and a bit years in .. I have a curvy figure and D cup breasts and feminine skin I dress to kill.. mini skirts, heels and strappy tops when weather allows it. I still think my legs are my best feature and i love to show them off.

I recently joined a gym and now I am have a female workout routine to help tone my body.

Breasts are handy and I use them like girls do to get things lol

[Christine Eryn]

I plan to be as gorgeous as possible!  I've been putting makeup on for 25 years (yes I've just aged myself) and with years of HRT, I finally look pretty stunning, MUCH better than 10 or 5 years ago. FFS will be the cherry on top, figuratively speaking. I've always had the necessary ingredients to pass, even when I was in denial. I have a long inseam with long legs, thin waist and ribcage, although my shoulders are still bigger than I'd like. HRT has really melted away the muscle too, much to my delight.

[Evelyn K]

I think confidence plays a big role here.

I remember when I started transitioning,, I was very worried will I pass .. especially when I went full time.. I dressed to be under the radar. As time went on and my body developed my confidence grew and I became dressing more girly in public.. now 3 and a bit years in .. I have a curvy figure and D cup breasts and feminine skin I dress to kill.. mini skirts, heels and strappy tops when weather allows it. I still think my legs are my best feature and i love to show them off.

I recently joined a gym and now I am have a female workout routine to help tone my body.

Breasts are handy and I use them like girls do to get things lol

It's not so much a passing or confidence thing.

It's just the reflection you where used to for 30 some odd years is now staring back at you like a different person. Remember, your entire life's experience and fond memories where tied to that reflection no matter the negatives and dysphorias.

Seeing yourself evolve into a different human being (and the opposite sex for that matter!) is outside of most human experiences.

What we, as trans people are doing is truly astonishing.