Augmenting Clothing At Work

[devon14]

Hey Everyone,

This has been an amazing month. I haven't felt truly depressed or suicidal for almost a month now. I've also been on hormones for about a month too. There is something that makes me sad every day though. Every day that passes, I feel more and more anxious to not dress as Devon (male side) and have a growing need to dress more as Athena. I've gotten so courageous that today I decided to wear my Devon clothes but with a cute plaid shirt as an overcoat to my regular tee shirt, similar to the one found here:

http://www.target.com/OpenZoomLayer?template=scene7-image&image=Target/15158629_is&omniZoomPartNumber=15158629&swCellSpacing=10,10&swHighlightThickness=1&swBorderThickness=0&itemTitle=Mossimo+Supply+Co.+Junior%26%23x27%3Bs+Plaid+Shirt+-+Assorted+Colors&omniImageCount=4

but its purple instead. There is something inside me that is just screaming "Let the world know! Don't hide any longer!" and then another part of me is just really un-eased that I'm even wearing this right now in public. I work for a very accepting organization and my department and HR already knows that I'm trans and are fully supporting of it. The rest of my organization is just in the dark right now though. Am i going a bit too far right now? Are there any tactics I should use for this clothing augmentation experiment? Should I just come out to the rest of my organization?   

[JamesG]

"Discretion is the better part of valor."

You don't want to run to far out in front of where your transition is, least you have a bad experience that shakes your confidence.

But you seem to have a handle on things, that is a cute cross-over shirt that is subtly feminine.  There are other little things that you can do like adding accessories like watches, bracelets or necklaces that most won't notice but will be a change and reminder to you that you are pretty. Oh and also, instead of plain ol' tee shirts, try tank tops.  Most will see "wife beater" (is that an Americanism?), but they feel different, feminine, without being as obvious as an actual camisole or bra. 

[devon14]

"Discretion is the better part of valor."

You don't want to run to far out in front of where your transition is, least you have a bad experience that shakes your confidence.

But you seem to have a handle on things, that is a cute cross-over shirt that is subtly feminine.  There are other little things that you can do like adding accessories like watches, bracelets or necklaces that most won't notice but will be a change and reminder to you that you are pretty. Oh and also, instead of plain ol' tee shirts, try tank tops.  Most will see "wife beater" (is that an Americanism?), but they feel different, feminine, without being as obvious as an actual camisole or bra.

I think your'e right. Ill keep it subtle right now. Ill look into getting some tank tops and see how that works. Thanks for the advice!

[Ducks]

I started out by buying some rebock tennis shoes that look the same male/female but I bought them in the women's shoe department.   I wore them out!  It made me feel good to know they were women's shoes, but also safe to know they were not going to out me.  It was enough to make it through the next year before I could move to the big city and start RLE.

[devon14]

Emily: Thanks for the advice. Yeah, I agree with you, people are not that observant or they just don't care. I'm just going to keep experimenting with subtle differnt variations. It feels to be more expresionate about myself even if it is subtle. I'm just going to keep experimenting and see what happens!  Not like my job will be compromised anyway and I'm sure that I have nothing to fear about coming out to everyone else but for now ill just let people make their own conclusions if they want to.

Ducks: Thanks for the advice! I really need to buy less emasculating shoes. My current shoes feel a bit too masculine so I might go to the store soon and look into the woman's shoe section to find something that is just slightly feminine.

[Dee Marshall]

I've been wearing purple converse low-tops for about a year. Long before I admitted to myself that I'm trans.

[Just Ole Me]

Gosh, You are clearly overestimating people's ingrained perceptions and blindness. I am rolling in somehow similar shirt to this one - except its pattern is strawberry/jade green, or wear purple tee under denim or plain black tailored button-ups - people at my work dont say a thing. They have used to see me as a guy and they keep seeing me that way.
At the same time, I was abroad in that nice plaid shirt and I scared one dude who was entering male WC and seemed quite confused about should he go in; also during the flight my seat was in the middle -  between two guys - and for some reason, lol, flight attendant addressed me first .
So, as long as Your well-established environment is concerned - just go for it! Push Your boundaries with each new day a small step forwards .

Emily
Your face in your avatar is amazing. For whatever reason, your face has shifted to "All Woman" in your new avatar picture.  You have been coming along nicely but you just slipped over to womanhood. Congrats. Keep it up!

Kay

[WaspWoman]

Athena, I totally know how you feel and I am pre-everything. Well most everything, I have lost a bunch of weight to the point where I actually like what I see from the neck down. Now I just hate getting dressed every morning, I so just want to wear something cute Well the time will come for me but I definitely think that if you feel comfortable sneaking feminine bits like that in you should totally go for it! I think people aren't really likely to notice, and you will look good and feel good and you should enjoy it. But yeah nothing too crazy just yet Chucks and slim fit boot cut jeans (men's) are as far as I have gone myself. I love that kind of plaid button up top, I plan on filling my closet with shirts like that from Columbia, my fav. You've got great taste

Emily, I love the new Avatar! I know you've been feeling a bit more andro than you'd like lately and I was just thinking how pretty you looked! Its like you just turned a corner, blue skies ahead for sure!

[Ms Grace]

Before I went full time I was champing at the bit to tell all my colleagues. In the end I decided not to until I was less than a week from going full time. My reason? I felt people have a hard enough time digesting the concept of someone being trans, but for me to tell them six/three/one month/s out and still retain my male name, presentation and pronouns during the intervening time can be really confusing for many: "you said you identified as female and yet you're still looking like a dude...what's up with that?" I told the boss in advance, she was understanding, but for the rest I left it to pretty much the last minute. They only got to see me in dude mode for another day after I outed myself and the following week everything switched over. Maybe it wouldn't have made much difference but I feel the transition at work has worked really well because of it.

If you like, tell close and trusted colleagues...those you know will keep your "secret" and will be sympathetic and able to talk with you about developments/progress. I had a couple of colleagues who I trusted with that and it helped ease the pressure of feeling like I needed to tell everyone.