Hi I'm having a few weeks of compilation, I am home for the first time in months and it always bring on this state, am I progressing as planned etc. I often read the posts on here when I needed comfort, and realise I spend so little time on here these days; I read the occasional post and I make even fewer replies. To me that means one thing I actually have not needed comforting or advise about transitioning.
So does that mean, I am been selfish for not supporting people coming behind me? There are so many ''brother and sisters'' on here that stay to help, yet I haven't. So I apologise.
I do want to say to those who are in early transition or struggling to start... Things can become amazing, like a dream that has come true. I had so many doubts of my path, and where it will lead, even if I would be able to complete it. I am approaching the final stages, SRS is going to be hopefully within this year, next week I have my final assessment for my surgery and the light at the end of MY tunnel is approaching faster than I could have imagined. But for those of us here who make this journey, you alone will understand my feelings of elation and actual calm, for been free and finally been true to myself... Something I hope every single one of you gets to feel and live.
I admittedly am extremely lucky, but I have also ''helped'' luck by working hard at my transition, but I know I pass convincingly; I have not been ''clocked'' in a year, I can go swimming, pubs, snowboarding, women only clubs, hetro clubs, I now KNOW I'm one of the girls, and becoming a woman with real experiences good and bad, in short a real life. The more I experience I live, the stronger and more confident I have grown and that just confirms to everyone around me, I am a woman. This belief and knowledge radiates from us when we accept who we are. Confidence comes from these experiences, not from wishing they will happen but through thousands of small steps with victories and defeats. I remember my horror when I first went out dressed, my first day full time, all distant and dealt with.
Believe in yourselves, believe and support each other and thank you all for just sharing yourselves on this site!
Sorry for been gushy! But I am happy and think I've finally found peace with myself.
x
