feeling lost and alone

[Umiko]

i really do love you guys. i'll try my best to hang in there a little longer.

Love, relax. I want you to be happy. There are people here that want you to be happy.
You hurting yourself will put you, and only you back. Now, I've cut,burn and tried to kill
myself. But what stopped me from doing that was the thought of, life will still go on.
Yes, people will be hurt and cry at first, they'll visit your grave. Years down the line, you'll
be a memory. Use your pain as your power. I want to see you looking fab as you can, I'll even
throw some clothes to you and a wig. I have random things.
If I can't make you happy as a friend, there will be someone out there who can.
There's too many of our people out there dying, I can't afford to find someone
who is near me going through the same pain, just give up.
You're a lovely person Brii, don't end it because of people trying to cut your dreams short.
Be strong, you have my number, don;t be a stranger.

frankie, you better clear your schedule becuz we are going to hang out lol

[echo_artist]

Aye Aye capt'n!~

[Jess42]

Brianna. Just know this. We all feel lost at one time or another but we are never alone, especially here.

[Ginny]

Brianna,
Hope your day is going better and you got some rest. How are you feeling today?

♥Jen

[Umiko]

Brianna,
Hope your day is going better and you got some rest. How are you feeling today?

♥Jen

i just woke up. my stomach is hurting, my head is pounding and my muscles are aching. other than that i'm ok. a little better than yesterday

[Ginny]

Blech, I've had those days before. Well a little better is at least a good start.
Now, get some food in that stomach 

[Umiko]

Blech, I've had those days before. Well a little better is at least a good start.
Now, get some food in that stomach 

i should but i cant eat while i'm in this state or i'll end up bulimic again. maybe when i feel a little more better

[Ltl89]

i just woke up. my stomach is hurting, my head is pounding and my muscles are aching. other than that i'm ok. a little better than yesterday

I understand.  I'm having one of those days myself.  Just remember you can get through this.  Is there any specific reasons you may be feeling this way today?  Would you like to talk about it?

[Ginny]

Possibly some ginger tea to settles your stomach or a beverage like Ensure so that you can get some neutrients into your system, which may also help with the headaches if enough magnesium and zinc in it.

Hope you're feeling better soon,
~Jen

Ps. Are you on E/P yet? When I started my mind calmed down significantly over the first week. My endo told me that E is sometimes used to treat various mental problems.

[Umiko]

Possibly some ginger tea to settles your stomach or a beverage like Ensure so that you can get some neutrients into your system, which may also help with the headaches if enough magnesium and zinc in it.

Hope you're feeling better soon,
~Jen

Ps. Are you on E/P yet? When I started my mind calmed down significantly over the first week. My endo told me that E is sometimes used to treat various mental problems.

still waiting for my doctor to call me and tell me what my endo says. i'd have to wait until july if i make the appointment myself. i'll see if i can find some ginger tea. just a waiting game now.

[Umiko]

I understand.  I'm having one of those days myself.  Just remember you can get through this.  Is there any specific reasons you may be feeling this way today?  Would you like to talk about it?

usually when i'm depressed, it can last from a day to a few months depending on the severity. just lingering affects plus i couldnt sleep so i had to take my pills and force myself to sleep

[Ltl89]

usually when i'm depressed, it can last from a day to a few months depending on the severity. just lingering affects plus i couldnt sleep so i had to take my pills and force myself to sleep

I understand.  I just suspect that some of these feelings may be tied to the pills and withdrawals. Believe me, you'll get no judgement from me as I sadly understand in my own way.  Just remember that you can overcome this even though you don't feel you can.  Once you do, you may feel a lot better but it takes getting through the bad stuff.  And I realize it's all hard to deal with while you've got your transition and other events complicating things.  Please remember, though, that you aren't alone and there are many of us that have been through these things and are going through them. 

[Ginny]

still waiting for my doctor to call me and tell me what my endo says. i'd have to wait until july if i make the appointment myself. i'll see if i can find some ginger tea. just a waiting game now.

Yeah, that waiting game sucks. I was going off the wall crazy knowing I had to wait two months when I did decide that this path was the one I truely needed to be me.
~Jen
PS. If there are no premade bags, you can always pour boiling water over sliced up ginger root from the produce aisle.

[Umiko]

so, day 2 and still no call from my doctor. i gave him my cell number yet they still dont call me. its getting very frustrating and its only serving to increase my depression to out of control heights. i'm barely hang by a string right now and i've exhausted all my other resources. i'll call in tomorrow but this isnt something that i should be put through. they know what my current stability is and yet it seems like they are doing this on purpose.

[Ltl89]

so, day 2 and still no call from my doctor. i gave him my cell number yet they still dont call me. its getting very frustrating and its only serving to increase my depression to out of control heights. i'm barely hang by a string right now and i've exhausted all my other resources. i'll call in tomorrow but this isnt something that i should be put through. they know what my current stability is and yet it seems like they are doing this on purpose.

From my own experience of working in a doctor's office, usually the staff relays a message back from the doctor, unless it's an immediate hospital call.  However, 2 days without a message isn't always rare, unless it's an urgent situation.  May I ask, what are you asking the doctor?  Is there a specific thing you want from them?  I understad you aren't feeling well, but I'm not sure what you are hoping the doctor to do?  Just clarifying.  Sometimes it's hard to accommodate non-specific requests over the phone, so please note that urgent care is best dealt with a one on one appointment or clinic visit.   I don't want you waiting around too long if you feel you need to be taking action right now. 

In any case, I'm really sorry you aren't feeling well.  Please know that at the very least we are all here to talk with you during this time. 

[Umiko]

From my own experience of working in a doctor's office, usually the staff relays a message back from the doctor, unless it's an immediate hospital call.  However, 2 days without a message isn't always rare, unless it's an urgent situation.  May I ask, what are you asking the doctor?  Is there a specific thing you want from them?  I understad you aren't feeling well, but I'm not sure what you are hoping the doctor to do?  Just clarifying.  Sometimes it's hard to accommodate non-specific requests over the phone, so please note that urgent care is best dealt with a one on one appointment or clinic visit.   I don't want you waiting around too long if you feel you need to be taking action right now. 

In any case, I'm really sorry you aren't feeling well.  Please know that at the very least we are all here to talk with you during this time.

my endo had said have my doctor contact her. might be able to get in earlier if i have my doctor call her.

[Ginny]

So are you waiting for a call from your pcp notifying you that they contacted your endo? If so i don't know if they would contact you about that. You may have to keep calling them on a daily basis. If its the endo that you are supposed to be hearing from, then give them a ring.
Unfortunatly, most of those places close @ 1600-1730, so the next time to contact them would be tomorrow morning.

Have you been able to get anything down today hun? Need to keep up your strength.
~Jen

[Umiko]

i was about to eat a little though i feel sick to my stomach still. i'll call in the office tomorrow and get the status. i may have to make an appointment to see my doctor tomorrow. he's going to probably ask me a hella amount of questions but i'm prepared for that. imma try and see if i can sleep tonight without my pills and maybe i'll be able to regain some energy back

[Ltl89]

i was about to eat a little though i feel sick to my stomach still. i'll call in the office tomorrow and get the status. i may have to make an appointment to see my doctor tomorrow. he's going to probably ask me a hella amount of questions but i'm prepared for that. imma try and see if i can sleep tonight without my pills and maybe i'll be able to regain some energy back

I think laying off the pills would be a great start and everyone here would be proud of you for doing that.  It's hard, I know this more than anyone, but it's a great first step to getting better.  Just relax and deal with the issue again tomorrow.  For now, try to clear your mind and get some sleep. 

[echo_artist]

I'm a holistic nerd, I'll give you some natural that'll help you sleep,with out the pain.