Advice for coming out to HR and my administration.

[Whynaut]

I was recently hired for a new teaching job (yay!). However, I was hired under my old name and as a female (boo.). I am 3 months on T now and I really can't work at this new school as a female because by the end of this year the changes will be apparent. I have really only spoken to one person at the district office and the assistant principal. I am scheduled to visit the school next Friday to look around and meet my colleagues. I absolutely do not want to do this as a female with my old name. I have the correct name and sex on my license, so they will see it when they get copies of my information.

I don't know what to do. I have not signed a contract yet (though I did sign an acceptance letter) so I'm worried about discrimination. Gender identity is protected in my state. Also, will signing a contract with my old name invalidate the contract? My old name is still on my SS Card and Passport.

Mostly, I just don't want to have an awkward year. Who should I talk to about being introduced as my correct name and gender? What should I say? Should I wait (then I will need to come out to more people)? Should I just casually tell them I go by Mr. ________?

Any advice, anecdotes, or ideas are welcome.

[LordKAT]

If you have the court papers for your name change, then use your new name. I have had to write the oldone for a check in the wrong name and then right after sign the correct name. I would think that a contract would have to be in your legal name. You should get the SS changed as soon as possible or you will have problems.

When you visit the school, inform them of the changes right away. It will be much easier on parents and students if you do so as they will have never known your prior name.

[JayDawg]

The university where I work recently included Gender Identity in their non-discrimination policy. I am not out at work yet, but it starts Monday by meeting with the head of the Diversity office. After that person gets the ball rolling for me, I think my next steps are the Equal Employment Opportunity office, followed by HR, followed by coming out to my boss and co-workers.

See if your school has similar offices. Also, see if your school has a LGBT group and contact them to see if they know where you should start. I got the path to follow from a combination of talking to a another trans employee that has been through it, and from my therapist making phone calls on my behalf.

In your case, I think the sooner you get all your paperwork done to match your driver's license and get that SSN changed to match, the better.

-Jay