Over the last 5-6 weeks since I got out of school, I've been desperately looking for a job, trying most everything I know in the area, thinking for sure someone would hire me. It's been far less than succesful. I've applied to so many jobs it equates to over one every other day. The four responses I've gotten back are "We're not hiring right now, " "We have more qualified applicants," "The position has already been filled," or worst of all, nothing at all. I've gotten a grand total one one, yes, only one, interview. And I didn't hear anything back from them. That made me really sad. I'm not sure if since I have to put my legal name on applications, but on my resumé, I use Lauren, and put a note at the bottom stating my legal name and that I am in the process of changing it (and I can't put the applicaton in until I have a job, it costs $150 for name, I don't know how much for the newspaper ad, and then $23 to California for gender (I didn't explain that on the application, just a little aside here,)) that it outs me right off the bat as trans, and since all the jobs I've applied to (which are pretty much the same type of jobs, mostly retail store clerks and such, or with fast food) make me openly visible to customers, and employers are reluctant to hire me because customers may complain and be upset, or if it's because some of the jobs made me take a survey about my personality, which is more of "lone wolf;" I have trouble trusting others and performing work in groups because I'm afraid that I'll be taken advantage of, which always happens, because I either take over because no one knows what they're doing, or they just dump all their responsabilities on me, and knowing myself, rather than not standing for it, I'll just tough it out. I was told nobody tells the truth on those things, and I should lie, but it seems so morally wrong, and I'm a terrible liar.
And now, it's that bill time of the month. I'm currently subleasing this apartment from a friend, who left it in terrible condition; I had to spend hours cleaning it, and it's still not done. We agreed on $200 a month. She wanted to do it under the table, but with her out of the country for a while, I wanted to make sure that it was legit. So she decided not to offer me the price and instead had made me pay the standard sublease fee of 85% of the rent, which comes out to $350. For what I'm getting, normally that wouldn't be too bad. My own room in a 4 bed 4 bath place, two of which don't have anyone in them. Washer and dryer en suite, most utilities included (except evidently electricity and gas, which I'll get to in a minute,) lots of amenities I can't/won't use (pool, hot tub, tanning, exercise room,) is on a bus route (albeit one that only goes to campus, it's more convenient for me to walk the mile and a half to Meijer to get one of the buses there; two go to campus and three to downtown,) but it's too much, and I don't really like living with a roommate. Especially this one. I was informed before accepting that she has a medical marijuana card. Ok, I didn't pay that much mind, I thought, as long as it was legal, it would be OK, right? Wrong. So so wrong. She smokes inside, making it smell horrible. I thought I could live with that, even having to lead with a can of air freshener every time I leave my room, I could deal with it. Even the headaches I get from inhaling the damn stuff, I thought I could deal with. Then the smell started seeping into my room and bathroom. The line has been crossed. Then I learned that she was dealing the stuff, not to mention other illegal narcotics. That, I cannot stand for. But I'm scared to do anything about it.
Barring the drug use (OK, it's still slightly relevant coming up,) there's a host of other issues that I have with her. One I do not is her cats. I love them. Except they desperately need baths; they smell pretty bad. How am I supposed to tell her to wash her cats? That seems outside of my jurisdiction, like, who am I to tell her to wash her cats? So I have to deal with it when they stick their tails in my face and it smells bad.
It's also time to clean the kitchen. I told her we'd do it together when I moved in. It ended up being just me cleaning, then making dinner for the two of us. So today I tell her it's her turn to clean the kitchen, but she says it's not that bad, it can wait another week. No, it needs to be cleaned now, it's filthy. Not as bad as it was when I moved in, but past the point my mother would have made me clean her kitchen. So I'm going to have to do it myself.
Not to mention the guys she brings home. Over half of them are really sketchy, and scare me. Worst is, one of them always brings his dog; this monstrous thing the size of a car that has this terrifying blood-curdling bark, and it barks at literally everything that moves. And then, she tells me she wants to impress the guy with a home cooked meal, and asks me to cook for them, using her food. I accepted so I could eat without using up my own food, the stock of which was dwindling.
One day, I left for a picnic I was invited to, and was gone most of the day. I left a baguette in its wrapper on the counter, and broke off an end for breakfast. When I get back, the thing is half gone. She has her own goddamn food and money to spend on food (which she does very poorly, preferring to buy prepackaged microwaveable things rather than actually making food herself, which is generally cheaper and healthier) and I'm struggling to make ends meet with the little money I have, I literally cannot afford for her to be eating my food.
tl;dr, I'm sick of acting like her mother, cooking, cleaning, and looking after her cats while she's just all carefree and higher than geostationary orbit.
The past few days have been rough. Yesterday, she said that she was going to be charged $120 for the gas and electricity for the two of us this month, and I needed to pay her half. That price is ridiculous if it's true, but I'm demanding to see a bill or some other proof before giving her the money, she could be scamming me. She proceeded to complain about how she was going to get the money to pay for it.
Here's the kicker. Today she comes home, having spent her money on what? Drugs. If she is so damn concerned about not having enough money to pay the bills, drugs are lower than the last thing you should be buying.
That did it. I decided today that as soon as I knew I had a job, I was finding a new place to live. Alone, so nobody can take advantage of me. Maybe with a cat if I need companionship and feel I can afford it.
Problem is, unless you're living in a 3 bed 1 bath apartment with 3 other people, you're not going to find much for less than $400, especially not anything close to $300, in a college town because all the places have ridiculous amenities that I don't need/can't use. My goal is to have two, possibly 3 part time jobs (since getting hired full time right off the bat is nearly impossible;) one to pay bills, and the other one/two to put money directly into savings for surgery. The more I decrease spending for things like rent, the more money goes to food, special treats, or savings. I'm trying to go as low as possible.
The apartment websites are all no use, so I've resorted to Craigslist. Found a lot of rooms for rent, 3 and 4 bedroom apartments needing another roommate, cheap places far beyond the bus routes, and posts that didn't seem so legit (eg only a few pictures, no address, reposted several times,) but only one studio apartment, at $375, electricity not included, unfurnished, and kinda far from downtown. I did find one that was 2 bed, 1 bath, on top of someone's garage, utilities not included, very very close to downtown, for $400, but I'd still like to get it under $350 including utilities. Furnished would be nice, but at that price isn't likely. Dad would maybe be willing to help out with furnishings, wouldn't need much other than a bed, table, maybe a chair. I could find those pretty cheap on Craigslist or whatnot, since I don't intend on staying here much more than another year before I jump ship to try and restart my education (which I practically ruined my chances here) in Europe (looking at going back to Belgium,) as well as finish up my major transition aspects (name change, hair removal, bottom surgery, possibly FFS if I can afford it and decide I still need it.)
tl;dr, I just want honest work and a cheap place to live alone, but don't know how to proceed.
Note to moderators: If anything breaks the site rules, I'll try to edit it to make it more vague.
