Hi everyone
Just wanted to formally introduce myself here. I've been posting about my recent top surgery and you all have been a great help.
I don't know where to begin...Should probably start with things like my age - 27, my location - USA, my gender...and that's where things get hazy. I'm terrible with labels so forgive me if I'm not totally PC. I'm anatomically female. Raised in a small farm town. Grew up such a tomboy that people actually mistook me for a boy. When puberty hit, it was crushing. I was put into a body/role that wasn't me. I struggled through it for many years and suffered from depression, anxiety, self harm, etc. Transender was a word I never even heard until college. Being gay was not acceptable where I came from. I hid my first relationship for a year before it became obvious to people. I left that small town and never looked back so dealing with those issues luckily is over. I have a wonderful partner of five years who has been so understanding of everything going on. I was afraid to tell her any of these feelings I had for a long time. It has really only been the last year that I have been open with her and more so able to be the real me. I cut my hair (I always thought that was the one thing that kept me 'normal'). Started wearing men's clothes. Started binding properly - I had been binding my whole life with multiple sports bras, I just didn't know there was a better way. And I had top surgery a couple weeks ago.
That's a lot of random stuff and I'm sorry if it makes no sense. What it boils down to is this - I've never been okay being a girl and I never knew that was an acceptable way to feel until recently. Places like this site give me hope that I can figure out who I am and be that person no matter where it may lead. I have no plans to go on T - I honestly don't know much about it and it scares me a bit. People who know me still use feminine pronouns, haven't changed my name. The labels and specifics don't bother me much at all. I just want to be me. A happy, caring and compassionate human being.
Thanks for listening to this mess - I look forward to interacting with you all more on the site.
