First Introductions

[cchick9]

Hello my name is C. I am a 25 yr old M. One thing has been on my mind lately, the decision of starting my transition. I know I am not alone in this experience but regardless, I don't know what to think at the moment. My first memory that I can recall I wished I wanted to be a girl, around 5 years old. There have been times in my life that the desire has been stronger, and others where I almost felt normal in the traditional sense. Throughout my life I have remained masculine in my clothing and posture. Occasionally trying on apparel of the opposite sex in secrecy, but became embarrassed of myself for a period of time. But upon reflection of my past life and choices, I regret not confronting these thoughts earlier in my life.

My body to me has never felt totally comfortable. I am now a slim 6'2" man and I am afraid that I will not find beauty in what I wish to become.

I have always related better with women, never been a gal pal but I have always preferred open hearted conversation over sports any day. Until this point I have held up this veil of secrecy to all around me, and it is catching up to with me. Like most people the anxiety catches up with you. 

I know it's a long and hard journey for anyone transitioning. All that I ever desired is to know that I am not alone in these struggles.

Thanks all,

C

[LordKAT]

Welcome to Susan's.

You are definitely not alone and I am glad you have found us. There are many here who share your feelings and are willing to talk with you.

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[EllieM]

Hi C. Like Kat said, you are definitely not alone. Let me further assure you, the girl inside will shine through if you let her. If you do not have the services of a therapist yet, you should explore that option; speaking from personal experience, I can assert that it is of great benefit. Don't be in a hurry for results, it takes time. If you have any concerns, this is a good place to let them out. We are here for you little sister.

[helen2010]

C

Good advice from Ellie and Kat.  Lots to learn, discover and experience.  Our paths are rarely linear.  There will be many unexpected twists and turns but there is a fair chance that some of us may have something to share which will be useful or of interest.

The harder work is yours.  Working with a good gender therapist will help you understand yourself and to find your best path.  Binary, non binary or nil transition may be on your path but that is in the future.  You have taken the first step and we wish you well.

Safe travels

Aisla

[Ms Grace]

Welcome to Susan's, C!

[Umiko]

omg! except our age difference, we have almost exactly the same body proportions xD ello and welcome to the family 

[Julia-Madrid]

Hello C, and welcome.

I fully relate to your first paragraph - it was me 20 years ago!!  But it took me until 2014 to make this wonderful change.

Take your time and explore yourself.  Do it with a good gender therapist as Aisla says, someone with whom you have a good connection.  And do not be scared - people are in awe of us and support us more than you might expect.  Your height is part of you; use it to your advantage!

On this site you'll get masses of support, since we're all going through something similar.  When you are ready, draw on your friends and family for support too, and make them part of your process.

Hugs
Julia

[cchick9]

Thanks everyone for the support. It's great to know that there are many others that have traveled a similar path. Next step for me will be meeting with a therapist to help express the inner me.

Best Wishes,

C. 

[Lady Curiosity]

Greetings! I'm 26 and can definitely relate to you on the height issue I'm like 6' 4". I'm more than glad to help in anyway I can. Hope to hear from you.



LC

[Jessica Merriman]

A big warm welcome C!!! First, I agree with everyone about Therapy. Being a retired Paramedic I never saw the benefit in it, but now I see it does make a difference. I totally advocate for Therapy as this is a huge life changing process and they help by being the calm in the storm. Second, please do not let outside appearances dull the inner shine that is you. Once you totally accept yourself, relax and present yourself wardrobe wise you will be amazed at what is possible. That leads to confidence which is 80% of passing.