Hey Girls... wanted to say hello and update on transition status.
I have moved out and living a few doors down from my wife.. we work together every day and see each other about as much as when we were not separated..
I have given my wife ok to date.. she really needs to be around a guy guy... and I understand that.
I have a new endo.. upped my E and about all I notice is that I sleep very well and need naps... and I have gained a little weight but in the right places.
My new endo said not to worry about FFS that I will pass fine... I just don't see it still.....
I showed my profile to my therapist yesterday and said see.. I look like a guy.... and she said all she see's is cute nose and high cheek bones..so whatever!! I have a body image issue I suppose I should trust others more.
Anyway, I am wanting SRS so really wanting to go full time.. so plan to go RLE after the holidays. My hair is growing fast so should be able to pull it off about that time.
At this point I can't see my customers anyway.. I have lost so much weight and my hair is so long people are shocked when they see me.
I used to look like a bad ass body builder now I look small.
For others that may go through a break up.... I can say its a process.. it hurts so much but does get better.. especially when you finally accept yourself and who you really are. I fought this hard.. but I am what I am and now out to every relative and friend.. everyone knows.....so that sure feels good.
I have not lost any friends or family so I am lucky..
I am in therapy every two weeks now.... I love going and wear my girl jeans bra which I need now and nail polish..
Funny thing happened the other night.. I had on my dark grey polish and decided to go for a cruise in my sport car .. about 11:30PPM ... I decided to stop and go through the drive through..wanted a chocolate shake..
I was getting my money out and went ooops... how do I do this.. so in fear I drove off and laughed at myself.
I should have just paid and not worried about it...
Going to Dallas for E3000 facial hair removal soon .. a two day thing will remove 40% of beard.. I can't wait to get that over with.
Its really getting hard to be male at all.. My therapist does not think I will make it until end of year thinks I will go full time sooner...We will see....
Wish you all well,
Luv
Carrie
