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Has anyone experienced hints of jealousy from cis girls

Started by stephaniec, August 02, 2014, 07:59:04 AM

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stephaniec

just curious if anyone's experienced any suggestion of an envious or bitterly jealous comment from cis woman who view you as becoming prettier or more womanly as you transition. I always hang out at this one coffee place in a downtown area and these two women that work in the area always buy their coffee there on their breaks. I have a feeling they might be some what jealous .  I don't know them personally other that I see them all the time and they seen me as male for a long time. They seem to make strange comments or just blurt out a laugh when they go by me. The hormones are doing a good job and I think I look pretty decent at 9 months in. I'm just suspicious there might be some jealousy because I'm turning out to be a little cuter . It could be just wishful thinking on my part though. Just wondering if anyone has experienced a little jealousy from the cis girls.
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suzifrommd

Stephanie, I've had situations where women seem to resent my "girliness", my interest in wearing flattering (but inexpensive) jewelry, skirts that show some leg, etc. I think there's some envy of my willing to be youthful while many cis women my age have long since tired of the feminine routine.

I certainly saw that from my ex, even before all the animosity from the divorce, that the flowers in my hair, pantyhose,  and other emblems of femininity made her uncomfortable.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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Eva Marie

Quote from: suzifrommd on August 02, 2014, 08:47:40 AM
I certainly saw that from my ex, even before all the animosity from the divorce, that the flowers in my hair, pantyhose,  and other emblems of femininity made her uncomfortable.

My ex once made a bitter comment that I had better legs than she did inferring that it wasn't right for me to be more femme than she was.
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stephaniec

Quote from: Eva Marie on August 02, 2014, 09:02:18 AM
My ex once made a bitter comment that I had better legs than she did inferring that it wasn't right for me to be more femme than she was.
I know the one girl went by me once talking to a guy she works with in a building next to the coffee shop , she made some kind of comment and the guy turned back and looked at me and made a face like you'd expect if she made a jealous kind of comment. It was rather funny tough.
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Jenna Marie

Not from *girls,* as I think they rarely envy middle-aged women anyway. :) Occasionally I have had another woman say she was jealous of my thick hair or really clear skin, but I'm not sure if you actually meant women who say it up front (in a not mean way) or women who act jealous and mean (never happened so far).
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stephaniec

well, positive or negative, but the negative ones are more fun
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KittyKat

I'm in a younger age group and I've very specifically been told by multiple girls they're jealous I only have to shave my legs once a week. And one girl yesterday said she thought I had better style sense then her. I'm around 20-30 year old crowd mainly.
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Auroramarianna

I have never experienced it, but I guess it is a mix of emotions. In a way, it can be flattering but on the other hand it can be extremely rude and invalidating if the jealousy is triggered like "oh she was born male and she is prettier than I am, ew, so fake" sort of way.
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allisonsteph

I had a cis friend tell me she is jealous because my boobs are bigger than hers. I've been on HRT for five months and am a C cup, she's an A cup.
In Ardua Tendit (She attempts difficult things)
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Julia-Madrid

I was out and about Madrid some weeks ago with a couple of cis girlfriends, and I was astonished to get hit on a couple of times during the day.  They were quite bemused but very gracious about it, with some mock indignation.  Maybe it was something in the air, or that I'm now much more comfortable with who I am... impossible to know what did it!

But it was fun.  A little unnerving too...!
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HelloKitty

Yes! Definitelythere has been some jealousy. From cis women, young ladies mostly.
Mostly because I'm pretty and more petite than the average cis woman.

But even more jealousy has been encountered in the trans community where I live. They are truly awful lol
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Carrie Liz

Oh yeah... cis-girls are REALLY jealous of beautiful trans women, I can tell you that right now.

My roommate seriously just about screamed when I showed her Carmen Carrera, Janet Mock, and a bunch of the Youtube transition timelines.

Basically, what she was thinking is "That's so not fair! How can she be prettier than ME? I was born female, damn it, how the hell can someone who was born male look more feminine than me?"

I guarantee you every girl has some lingering resentment about her looks and her physical inadequacies buried in there somewhere... this is why so many girls are bitter jealous backstabbing b****es in middle and high school before they've learned to curb their jealousy of those who are prettier than them.

I've had a few cis-female friends tell me "I'd kill for your legs grrrrrrl!" or that they loved one of my outfits, but that's about it. I haven't really gotten any jealousy directed toward me because I'm not very feminine, I'm 6'2", large-built, and have kind of a "meh" face and an average figure. So I don't have much to be jealous of. Maybe I'll get more once I'm out in the wide world, but I doubt it, I definitely look like a more athletic tomboyish girl. And most women aren't jealous of tomboys, they're jealous of the pretty, cute, petite, feminine girls.

Other trans women, on the other hand... dear God, I get SO much jealousy from them. There's actually girls who have come to me crying and whining about how they'll never be as naturally-female as me, so why do they even bother trying? (And I'm just rolling my eyes and going "Sigh... still in that phase of transition where you're mired in self-hatred, and still think that absolutely everyone else is pretty except you, I see. Yep, I remember that phase. Ah, youth.") Plus there's been several times in our trans support group where other trans-women have basically given me this bitter "how DARE you still be having emotional problems? If I was you, my life would be perfect, damn it!" attitude.
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latoya rayne

Yesterday I took a friend of mine to get her septum pierced, this group of teenage girls was giggling and when they entered the car and latterly made it known they were laughing about me, pretty sure it was the top I'm wearing. So when I saw them stare, I gave them the finger and they acted so shocked. Can't stand teenage girls
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Joanna Dark

No, not from any girl lately. Except for my BF's ex-rommate but that was just because she prolly had a thing for him. When I was with my ex, she was okay at first with me, actually for years, but at the end, she was all "stop plucking your eyebrows. I don't want to go out with someone prettier than me." She was a really butch for most of the relationship, after she changed, it was doomed. But, i wouldn't call it jealousy. You'd have to be crazy to be jealous of me...though I've had some girls say they wish they were as tiny as me.I'm tiny all around: 13" wide shoulders, small, tiny hands and feet, 115 lbs, blah, blah, blah. Most of my life, I would have done anything to be bigger as I thought my transness was related to my tiny, femme look.
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Ahlexandrah

I have received a lot of jealousy and envy from many cis girls. I have even been in heavy fights because of them. But many dont know that I am trans anyway so if they would know, I guess they would even feel worse lawl. I just find it ignorant, I mean I did so much for my transition and they still bitch on me its not even fun anymore. I just dont feel like this is right, to envy someone from anything they have been receiving or doing for their progress. So yes I totaly know this it has happened to me many times and it kinda makes me feel bad for them because I dont know how to deal with it.

This his how I look like lately

http://www.directupload.net/file/d/3702/ua2n3d2y_jpg.htm

http://www.directupload.net/file/d/3702/vhdwh4bp_jpg.ht

http://www.directupload.net/file/d/3702/py247fqd_jpg.htm
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Jess42

I would like to think it's jealousy or envy. I have a theory but won't go too much into it. But we strive to be feminine and do all the things a woman should do but become lazy over time doing and let themselves go over the weekends and so on. Do we transwomen let ourselves go over the weekends? I don't. Also we cherish femininity and to ciswomen it ain't no big deal because they were born to it and we have to learn it and hone in on it and try to perfect it and in a lot of ways I believe transwomen are more feminine than ciswomen. Also a lot of cis women seem to resent being feminine, hell we love being feminine. Does this make any sense to anyone besides me? I think a lot more straight guys are seeing this too and they crave the femininity so they can feel more masculine. Of course I could be crazy too. ???
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Evelyn K

Quote from: Ahlexandrah on August 02, 2014, 12:16:24 PM
I have received a lot of jealousy and envy from many cis girls. I have even been in heavy fights because of them. But many dont know that I am trans anyway so if they would know, I guess they would even feel worse lawl. I just find it ignorant, I mean I did so much for my transition and they still bitch on me its not even fun anymore. I just dont feel like this is right, to envy someone from anything they have been receiving or doing for their progress. So yes I totaly know this it has happened to me many times and it kinda makes me feel bad for them because I dont know how to deal with it.

This his how I look like lately

http://www.directupload.net/file/d/3702/ua2n3d2y_jpg.htm



http://www.directupload.net/file/d/3702/py247fqd_jpg.htm



OH mY GOD. YOU NEED TO POST THESE IN THE "YOU LOOK FABULOUS" THREAD POST HASTE!
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,162746.0.html

TAKE THE EXPRESS LANE!
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Evelyn K

Quote from: stephaniec on August 02, 2014, 07:59:04 AM
just curious if anyone's experienced any suggestion of an envious or bitterly jealous comment from cis woman who view you as becoming prettier or more womanly as you transition. I always hang out at this one coffee place in a downtown area and these two women that work in the area always buy their coffee there on their breaks. I have a feeling they might be some what jealous .  I don't know them personally other that I see them all the time and they seen me as male for a long time. They seem to make strange comments or just blurt out a laugh when they go by me. The hormones are doing a good job and I think I look pretty decent at 9 months in. I'm just suspicious there might be some jealousy because I'm turning out to be a little cuter . It could be just wishful thinking on my part though. Just wondering if anyone has experienced a little jealousy from the cis girls.

All the time hon... ;D

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Ms Grace

Sometimes I get very flattering comments from my female colleagues. I've had one "that dress looks better on you than it ever would on me" style comment. I figure women generally feel some envy, jealousy of more attractive women...based on women's magazines it seems to be a love/hate relationship...praise them but be ready to rip them to shreds the second any imperfection shows.
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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Misha

Only like two weeks ago my younger sister mentioned that she's starting to view me as competition. That surprised me a little bit as there's quite an age difference between us: 13 years. Then again she actually said like 2 or 3 years ago that she envies me my legs (she had no idea at that time what I had planned :-) ).

And as time passes I notice more mostly comparative or even a few jealous if not hateful (very rare fortunately) looks from other women when I'm traveling through Prague metro (what better time to take a look at others then when you're waiting to reach your stop). I mean I knew there's sort of competition between women but I certainly haven't expected anything like this...
Semi-blind asperger transwoman. But do I care? No I don't. I love myself :-) .
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