"My mom is clearly either ignoring the issue, brushing it off or in serious denial. But dunno cause she asks me everyday with her "loving facial expression" if I'm okay and doesn't do that to my siblings." if she is "brushing you off" or acting like its not an important issue to her(because clearly is is) she is doing it because she thinks acting like it doesn't matter will make you feel better if something I aid made my son n to his room and cry I would feel very badly and try to make him feel better and I think that's what she is doing despite being on a mission to change your decision in any way she can think of , she is still very aware and sensitive to your feelings and hates to see you sad so pretending like its not a big deal is for your benefit
i definately do think she is worried about your well being and mostly concerned about how other people are going to treat you . i dont think she is ignoring the issue or is brushing it off at all in fact you and the problem of you being transsexual (in her mind it is a problem) is likely the main thing on her mind throughout every day im sure . if she believes that you will be happy (meaning the world around you will be supportive and accepting of you and that could mean just you having a support system and close friends who support you I think she is focused on the negative feedback you are going to get from the world around you ) she will be accepting of it if she does see that you are accepted by how society reacts to you being different if she sees a lot of backlash against you or bullying or any other problems socially . there is a big difference whether the world will accept you as a woman or if the world will see you as something different or alternative from the norm and how much of a social outcast you are going to become is of great concern to her im sure . if you really can pass as a woman she will have a much easier time accepting it even though of course just seeing you as a girl in the first place when she has only known you as a boy for so long but I do think she can get used to having a daughter and can get excited about it if you are going to be living as a woman and accepted and not live as a "transwoman" with more problems in life , and it just means that she loves you and wants to see you happy so don't be too mad at her she cant help how she feels
if she believes the world is attacking you or likely to attack you she will panic I have no doubt she will and if you are the age where you are newly going out into the world for the first time mine are not quite at that stage yet but very very close and I really don't know how calm or mentally stable I will be when that happens but im guessing it will be like sending them to school for the first time but much worse and ill feel even more worried, but I think that will ENTIRELY depend on one thing and that is how well my son will adjust to society and how much he is accepted by society and most importantly how he is treated by society but yes i can pretty much guarantee you are on her mind a lot (contantly more likely) and this is the number 1 problem on her list that she needs to fix for you because she simply does not think it will make you happy IF she did think it would make you happy she would not see it as a problem and would be happy for you and that is just with anything you decide to do in life not just this she would welcome a new daughter if she did think it would make you happy but obviously right now she isn't convinced of it and really the only thing that will convince her is what you tell her and also how she sees other people acting towards you . it might take her a while not to see you as the gender you have always been but she will get used to it and accept it all .
the only way she will accept this , or anything else you do in life, is if she really believes it will make you happy ....... so just explain to her the great reactions and support you are getting from people around you . and express to her your feeling of happiness now because of your decision to live this way , and letting her know how unhappy you were before , and i think you will be amazed at her openmindedness and acceptance and how her complete attitude changes if she becomes convinced that life will lead to your happiness but how other people around you treat you matters veryuc to her because she knows that has an effect on you if you are in an environment where you have a lot of support that will make a difference
