There are tears and there is anger now too.
Lady Jess, if there is any way I can persuade you not to cut loose from your support family here on Susans - the family that unconditionally loves you, forget anyone that doesn't, if there is any way than I need to try and push your buttons.
Living transsexual is not a walk to be done alone, and being cut off is like being served up to the enemy of our souls. IMO. If the giving and the doing of the moderation thing is getting difficult, or catty, or whatever else that very difficult walk is, then by all means, drop it. Drop the baggage. But Jessica needs to take care of Jessica, and we who are loyal to you need to take care of Jessica too.
So however you need to handle it, you need to know that you are NEVER NEVER EVER ALONE, that there are friends here that are real and don't let go, and that we face a common pain and know what it means. There is always an instinct to run and hide, especially if you feel embarrassed or ridiculed, but is that really the solution?
There is a saying in the military about it. Never let the ba----rds win. I am not saying that those who disagree with you are malicious, but I am saying that as survivors of trans, we stick with each other, sometimes to the bitter end.
So I beg you do not throw that out, leave us a way to stay in touch, or don't leave us at all. The emotions may be too heavy to do the moderating, maybe even to stay on the forum threads, but you are still family, and girl, you can't change that. Not in my family you can't.
Now I've got the darn tears. Stay. How dangerous was it for me when I had the first breakdown, who was the one that would stay up all night with me? There were others, but you were key that night.
The stakes are too high.
Rest if you must, but don't leave please, if this stubborn ex drunk has anything to do to influence that. I feel like it may be a losing cause, but I do not want to see you pull out of here.
You are at risk girl, you need us, even if its through PM's for a while.
If anyone is screwing with her head, cut it out right now.
Nails out, and praying for a miracle.
