Would you say I'm atypical Gender Dysphoric?

[Shodan]

I'm just going to chime into the original poster with that I, like you, didn't play with girly things or dress up or demand to wear dresses or anything like that when I was a kid. Then again, when I was a kid it was the late 70s and early 80s, so the knowledge of what transgender is was very limited, and pretty much nonexistent to the public. If I'd known that being transsexual was something that I could do, I definitely would have asserted myself more. But at the time, I was labeled boy, so I did boy things. From what I've seen and experienced, this is the more typical trans narrative than playing with dolls and raiding mommy's closet and that kind of thing, so you're far from alone.

Okay. Now that I think about it I did play with dolls. They were just called 'Action Figures.' 

[stephaniec]

I never  ever liked dolls of any kind, my thing was dinos , T-Rex and friends

[Shodan]

For me? Transformers and Legos.

[immortal gypsy]

Version 7 of the SOC does not require 3 months therapy. I'll need to update my Psychiatrist.

The criteria for hormone therapy are as follows:
1. Persistent, well-documented gender dysphoria;
2. Capacity to make a fully informed decision and to consent for treatment;
3. Age of majority in a given country (if younger, follow the SOC outlined in section VI);
4. If significant medical or mental health concerns are present, they must be reasonably well- controlled.

Yeah mine had trouble with me and number four on numerous occasions. I still don't think he completely trusted me when he signed off on the hormones

[ElDudette]

Lego, Transformers, Construx, science nerd stuff out the wazoo (telescope, chemistry set, detailed lunar poster)

Only time I really played with dolls was teaching a family friend's daughters how to take elastic from their mum's sewing kit and make bungie cords for Barbie & Skipper

I dressed up very infrequently (two maybe 3 binge+purges over 20ish years), with a few excursions to comic conventions dressed as "a character from a web comic I draw" who wore an ankle length wrap-skirt type deal, w/ a sleeveless hoodie.

Most of my "dress up" was vicariously living as a woman in RPG's like World of Warcraft.

My body dysphoria was in the form of frequently looking in mirrors in existentialist fugues going "Who are you?"  Back in the day when LiveJournal was the bee's knees, every so often I'd end up writing a post about looking in mirrors and 'seeing an empty shell' and fall into a philosophical rambling about 'what makes a person a person, and how exactly do we know who we are?' Which everyone just took as me being an overly-introspective-crazy-artsy type.



I never had the "typical" hatred for my genitals. It was more of a passive-aggressive disdain, and no emotional attachment or concern if/when they got injured.



TL:DR summary:  "Typical" is just a term used to try and make things easier to parse.  "Normal" is a vague definition based around what the socially accepted average is.

[katiej]

I grew up with only one younger brother, so dolls and girls clothes were just not available.  Although I did spend a lot of time in my mom's closet any chance I got after about the age of 11 or so. 

For me it was always that I really wished I was a girl, but figured that I wasn't.  So I tried really hard to be a guy...and just never quite succeeded IMO. 

This whole "typical dysphoric" nonsense is actually what convinced me not to transition in my early 20's.  I read as much as I could...well...as much as was available 15 years ago.  And because I didn't have a tragic upbringing, was never abused, never took drugs, never attempted suicide, etc.  I figured I must not really be transgender because it wasn't a life or death issue for me like it was supposed to be.

It wasn't until just a year ago that I realized that other people don't spend considerable amounts of time wishing they were the other gender.  And they certainly aren't driven towards self-destructive and suicidal tendencies because of it.  So clearly...THAT makes me transgender.

[ElDudette]

This whole "typical dysphoric" nonsense is actually what convinced me not to transition in my early 20's.  I read as much as I could...well...as much as was available 15 years ago.  And because I didn't have a tragic upbringing, was never abused, never took drugs, never attempted suicide, etc.  I figured I must not really be transgender because it wasn't a life or death issue for me like it was supposed to be.

It wasn't until just a year ago that I realized that other people don't spend considerable amounts of time wishing they were the other gender.  And they certainly aren't driven towards self-destructive and suicidal tendencies because of it.  So clearly...THAT makes me transgender.

Sounds very much the same as my 20's. Persistent and obsessive thoughts of wanting to be a woman, but dismissing it as a phase since I didn't match up on other qualifying markers'

[katiej]

For me, transition isn't an escape from a horrible existence as a man.  It's about becoming who I really am.  Cause I'm just not...this.

I am definitely dysphoric, but it's more an obsession about being a woman rather than hatred of being MAAB.  Make sense?

[JoanneB]

"Atypical" would pretty much describe anyone's GD who was born before the 1970's! Pull-eeeze! Everything you described was the "normal" way of handling it.

[kaye]

I grew up with only one younger brother, so dolls and girls clothes were just not available.  Although I did spend a lot of time in my mom's closet any chance I got after about the age of 11 or so. 

For me it was always that I really wished I was a girl, but figured that I wasn't.  So I tried really hard to be a guy...and just never quite succeeded IMO. 

This whole "typical dysphoric" nonsense is actually what convinced me not to transition in my early 20's.  I read as much as I could...well...as much as was available 15 years ago.  And because I didn't have a tragic upbringing, was never abused, never took drugs, never attempted suicide, etc.  I figured I must not really be transgender because it wasn't a life or death issue for me like it was supposed to be.

It wasn't until just a year ago that I realized that other people don't spend considerable amounts of time wishing they were the other gender.  And they certainly aren't driven towards self-destructive and suicidal tendencies because of it.  So clearly...THAT makes me transgender.

If anything is the typical trans narrative this is it. Fits me and many others.

[Shodan]

Sounds very much the same as my 20's. Persistent and obsessive thoughts of wanting to be a woman, but dismissing it as a phase since I didn't match up on other qualifying markers'

Oh, God, me too.

I hate making a post that pretty much says nothing beyond that, but that's pretty much exactly me.

[Jill F]

"Normal" is highly overrated anyway.

[Jess42]

"Normal" is highly overrated anyway.

My motto Jill. I don't even care to be normal.

Atypical and typical gender dysphoria. Well I played with dolls growing up and still pee standing up unless I am dressed in a skirt. It is more convenient so I guess I'm atypical too. I did the doll thing because all my family members were girls that were around my age. All the other kids my age that lived around me were girls too. What sux and is really atypical is that I am more girly than some of those female cousins. That is the epitome of irony. Most of them have hunted and killed more deer than I have. Me,0, them, all except for one, 2 or more.

[BreezyB]

Well it sounds like not one of us are actually what my Psychiatrist (or anyone's for that matter) would call typical Gender Dysphoric individuals. So where have they got this idea that there is a typical version of us? So their must be an awful lot of atypical gender Dysphoria diagnosiss going around.

Or perhaps the whole concept is flawed, the idea of what is typical of a transgender person. I think we are as varied as the spectrum of gender itself.

I'm having a talk with my psychiatrist, this girls not a happy camper 

[Foxglove]

I'm told because I haven't spoken openly about it when growing up, or played with dolls, played dress ups or done a number of the other things you may commonly associate with a Gender Dysphoric individual, I'm in the atypical category. I just find that ridiculous.

[SCREAMS!  STARTS PULLING HER HAIR OUT!  THROWS BREAKABLE OBJECTS AT THE WALL!]

Honestly, cisgender people drive me around the twist sometimes.  They totally repress us and then blame us for not expressing "typical transgender behaviour".

Like when I put on a dress for the first time at the age of 4.  Tell me, doc, is that "typical transgender behaviour"?  And then my dad made it plain to me that there would be the direst of consequences if I ever did that again.  So is it any surprise if it was quite some time before I expressed any "typical transgender behaviour" again?  And when I did it I made sure to keep it secret so that nobody would know about it?  So is there anyone in my family who can testify that I was exhibiting "typical transgender behaviour"?

And why didn't I ever play with a doll?  Maybe because there was no way Mommy and Daddy would ever buy me one?  And why didn't I wear a formal gown to the prom instead of a tux?  Very stupid of me.  I'm sure the school administration wouldn't have had any objections.

Sometimes you think that cispeople must be total eejits.  Another of my favorites is when they sanctimoniously point out that even after transitioning transpeople display more suicidal tendencies and morbid behaviour than cispeople.  Well, maybe you could stop tormenting us, maybe you could leave us in peace to get on with our lives and then we'd be a bit better adjusted.  Is that possible?

I don't know about "typical transgender behaviour", but typical cisgender behaviour can be a bit questionable at times.  Jaysus!!!

[Andreja Silvija]

My psychologist seemed to be hung up on the fact that I didn't go drag, at least in private at all. Sure I did it when I was a kid with my sister and friends, but when your step-father stops finding it cute and starts beating you for it you kinda stop. She also really grilled me about my hair, first came in with 2 week growth off a buzz. It really was just force of habit, to "be a man", and I've been growing it out since. She has since written me my HRT letter and set up an appointment with an endocrinologist. I still haven't heard an official diagnosis, I'll ask tomorrow when I see her I guess.

[Shodan]

My psychologist seemed to be hung up on the fact that I didn't go drag, at least in private at all. Sure I did it when I was a kid with my sister and friends, but when your step-father stops finding it cute and starts beating you for it you kinda stop. She also really grilled me about my hair, first came in with 2 week growth off a buzz. It really was just force of habit, to "be a man", and I've been growing it out since. She has since written me my HRT letter and set up an appointment with an endocrinologist. I still haven't heard an official diagnosis, I'll ask tomorrow when I see her I guess.

IIRC, one of the components of The Letter is that you are diagnosed with Gender Dysphoria. At least that was a requirement from my Endo.

[ImagineKate]

Most transgenders are like this. The trouble is the media likes to promote the ' always played with dolls and dressed in girls clothes' thing and that becomes the typical trans story.

The reality is that most of us don't get the opportunity to express who were are until much later for all manner of reasons.

This.

How twas I supposed to dress up when I lived with my dad and there were zero articles of women's clothing in the house? Sure, when I was at my mom's I went to town. At my dad's house I even borrowed my cuz's without them knowing (I hope). They lived next door. Buying dresses, bras and panties in the store was not possible... I would get laughed out of it in my transphobic country, IF I even had money to do so.

[LizMarie]

I'm not sure why this upsets you? It's a diagnosis. It's supportive. You're going to get what you want.

Most therapists carry some of their own baggage. I wouldn't worry about it. Take the positives and run with them!

[BreezyB]

I'm not sure why this upsets you? It's a diagnosis. It's supportive. You're going to get what you want.

Most therapists carry some of their own baggage. I wouldn't worry about it. Take the positives and run with them!

Well I'm not losing sleep over this Liz so that's a good thing. But this for me is a discussion primarily about what is deemed to be normal, or consistently the majority. And I really disagree when terms are thrown around like that because it implies there is an abnormal also. So are we all 'normal'? If I was to use the approach of my therapist I would have to say 'no' we're not, we're abnormal. But I disagree with that completely. Because what is normal? I mean it's 'normal' for the sun to rise in the morning. But I have personal experience and loads of evidence to back up that finding. So if my therapist had personal experience and also a truckload of evidence to backup any such claim that one is 'typical' or 'atypical' then this post may not exist. But he doesn't, the assumption of 'typical' has been made I assume, on nothing more than what the media or Hollywood portrays us as. And that I would like to change. Still working out how though 

Ok, my rant is now over. Sorry everyone, Bree gets carried away sometimes  *sigh*