Is anyone scared of SRS,if so,what is your biggest fear?

[ImagineKate]

I'm married to my wife (for now) and she likes my penis. I was hoping I would keep it and we could still enjoy each other with it. But it looks like HRT will quickly kill my male sexual function anyway so what's the point. And I'm unsure my marriage will last too.

I'm afraid of:

Not dilating and having it lose depth/close up/prolapse. Let's say I get injured and I'm unable to dilate, for example.

Complications. I've heard of really scary stuff happening.

Pain. I've heard everything from no big deal to being hit by a truck.

Cost. It's 20k now, could go up and insurance is resisting covering it.

Why I want it:

I am a woman. I want to be anatomically complete as far as possible.

I want to wear yoga pants and bikinis.

I want unquestioned access to female only areas (eg bathrooms)

If my marriage ends I may want to find love again.

It may be required for document changes in my old country when they change those laws.

[Apples Mk.II]

I'm scared of the first post-op recovery days. I'm 9 days post-op from face and although my first day was terrible, I could walk. My biggest fears about SRS are:

- Being 4 days stuck in a bed unable to move. Being one night stuck and unable to drink was already hell, never finding a good posture, getting nausea every time I laid from the anaesthesia...
- The long recovery: I've been here for 14 days already, alone, and I am going nuts already. I know what my preparations errors where, but being 30-40 days here alone in a foreign country, while all of your friends are in a separate timezone...
-The post op recovery. I'm not kidding. I also know that the first time I see it is going to be horrible. After I woke up and they handed me the mirror I was like "What have I done, I've messed everything and now I'll have to live with this, I want to die.

I think that since SRS will be my third transition related surgery, I will be more savvy and make less errors, but still it will be bad. I'm not worried about pain or difficulty ewalking: I've had 5 days half blind, half mute, unable to eat or breath. It doesn't get worse than that.

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[Lostkitten]

It scares me for sure. I don't like surgery. Of being 'put' to sleep. Waking up not knowing how it will feel, the recovery not knowing how it will know. The unknowing is scary.

But it isn't often on my mind. No point feeling constant fear about something which you have to go trough anyway.

[AnonyMs]

I've had general anesthetic for tests a few times, and I've had smaller surgeries under general anesthetic, so I'm not too worried about that. They give great pain killers in hospital so that doesn't bother me. I think surgery is like flying perhaps, only scary the first time or two. Its a bit ridiculous, but the thing I really worry about now for that kind of thing is the canula the stick in you hand before they start - I've a bit of needle phobia. It probably what would stress me out just before SRS as well.

For SRS I don't think I'm scared of anything that has a realistic chance of happening. Recovery afterwards sounds like it's not much fun, and it can go on for a while. I get bored easily as well, so being stuck in bed is sure to drive me nuts. But above all, the bad parts will soon fade away into memory, while you get to keep the good bit.

I think I'm more concerned about being disappointed in the quality of the result. That might be hard to deal with, although I don't think there's much chance of it. I definitely wouldn't do any other surgery at the same time though, as I think that would be more than I'd want to suffer though.

FFS on the other hand, I'm intimidated by the thought of that all by itself. SRS looks easy in comparison.

[Brenda E]

I'm worried that I'll get all the way to the hospital on the day of SRS, then back out literally at the last minute and regret not having it done.  I have a history of getting 99% of the way to where I want to go, then getting frightened and backing out at the last minute, staying in the safety (and unhappiness) of what I know rather than taking a chance on change.

[suzifrommd]

I am,because I am scared of the extreme pain.

It was not especially painful.

My biggest fear is that I'd realize I'd made a horrible mistake, but it would, of course, be way too late to go back.

For the record, that didn't happen. Every time I see or feel my new body, it's like I've won the lottery.

[Rachel]

I have been thinking more and more about surgeries, I think about it several times a day, before bed and when I wake up.

I am very apprehensive. I want my wife and to be corrected but I may need to choose or have the choice made for me. I will work on the difficult conversations in therapy for 2015. I want to work on completing all the requirements for the surgery now or start soon. Then when I have made my decision I will no lost time.

The complications are something I am worried about as well as time away from work and being kicked out by my wife. If I do not continue I am worried my dysphoria will get the best of me.

I thought therapy and HRT would be enough. Then group would be enough and now I know I want to be the best I can be.

[PinkCloud]

Having had SRS just 4 weeks ago, the pain was less than I anticipated. Although I had extra complications which made it worse than normal, I still managed fine. After 14 days I was of pain medication. Without complication I could have been of at the 7 day mark I think. After 2 days they stopped giving me morphine, and gave me paracetamol. So I think you'll do just fine. Just let go... and let the surgeon and nurses take care of you. Trust me, I am such a control freak, letting go was the only thing that made the whole experience wonderful, instead of painful.

[Megumi]

The only thing I'm scared of is NOT being able to afford to have it done once I've cleared the 1 year of living full time requirement and to see how lucky I can get with my insurance & doctor that I want to use for the operation. Pain doesn't scare me, I'm a woman and for me having male anatomy down there completely delegitimizes who I am as a woman. I have zero concern about having regret post-op as I know who I am through and through. 

[MyKa]

No fears just scared it might be another year before it becomes reality

[Kamiki]

Biggest fear? That the surgeon is rocking out to Hedwig and the Angry Inch as I am put under.

You just made my morning.

My biggest fear has always been not having it done and regretting it for the remainder of my life.

And I have hope I can upgrade in the future (when you combine the woman in Europe who got a stem cell vagina and the fact we are to womb transplants....well one day I may be able to go get a factory replacement!). So my biggest fear now, that getting my neovag in any way inhibits my future ability to get a real one if it ever becomes possible/feasible.


Kami

[Makenzie]

I know.I hope one day before I get too old that we can get pregnant and have bio children.Im only in my teens so maybe it could happen.

[TSJasmine]

I'm married to my wife (for now) and she likes my penis. I was hoping I would keep it and we could still enjoy each other with it. But it looks like HRT will quickly kill my male sexual function anyway so what's the point. And I'm unsure my marriage will last too.

Actually, almost 16 months on E & I am still functional. Dry orgasm, but still functional. Also, my testosterone is literally 1 & my Estrogen is in a high adult female range. Sooo, you may not lose it. I think it's one of those things that are like "If you don't use it, you lose it" . So, yeahhh. It will probably shrink though, js.

[Rose City Rose]

I'm sure it's different for everyone, but I'm unable to enjoy intimacy at all now, due to dysphoria over the wrong parts.

SRS for me is an opportunity for me to rid that source of dyphoria, and an opportunity for me to actually enjoy intimacy for the remainder of my life. With that perspective, the risks are real, but worth it for what I can gain.

If I get to that point, I'd take the chance, yeah.  I think complete loss of enjoyment and/or suicidality might be the last straw for me.

[ImagineKate]

Actually, almost 16 months on E & I am still functional. Dry orgasm, but still functional. Also, my testosterone is literally 1 & my Estrogen is in a high adult female range. Sooo, you may not lose it. I think it's one of those things that are like "If you don't use it, you lose it" . So, yeahhh. It will probably shrink though, js.

I took low dose e only for 2 months and found it difficult to maintain an erection. I know I couldn't have penetrative sex after a certain point so I just stopped trying.

[Makenzie]

I mean,regret is my main fear,honestly.

[stephaniec]

the main problem for me is that I have no one to help me after surgery and how ever long it takes to get back to normal. that scares me.

[Makenzie]

I thought you were post-op Stephanie

[immortal gypsy]

Ultimate fear: I want GAS at least until I'm out then you can use one of those infernal things on me.

Major fear: Waking up it is surgery after all

Constant Worry: Being able to pay before and after costs. I'm classified as a casual so I don't have sick holiday pay. Including time off work I know my costs will be high so I need to save hard and well.

Minor fear: Do I want/need the surgery will I be happy if I have it will there be any regrets? Right now yes, yes and no but that may change.  Will have to be having some serious talks with a professional when I reach my target balance

[HoneyStrums]

Scared? Yes!

But what of. I suppose at this momet im scared of all the egatives listed here. But iroicaly i think the fear that will get me the most is, the shock factor of what the apeal derectly after opp is. (part of me wants to not have to look at it for 6 mounths).

The fact ill go for srs is something im acustomed to right now. So Atleast im notworried about the should I or Shouldt i side to it. So for the shock factor Ill need to see if there is some way i ca see imediat afters alongside the same patients months after. (that shoud ease it a bit)

Another fear of mine, is depth, (not being able to get that avarage with a bit of room to spare) Or messing up the dialation, my tolerece for pain is quite high and im frightened i might split my stiches with the dialator. or just do it all wrong. (Guessing dialation is not masterbation, not initially anyway)

The Iroic side to my fears, is im more scared of somthing I might do wrong afterwards and/or before as aposed to the surgery its self.
My guess is fears are a part of who we are too, and somthing scar other more then others. (so i though id add my two cents here, ust incase my fears are closer to others)