I am starting out at a new job, and for a number of reasons, I decided to come out to HR and be out at work, and called by my correct name and pronouns.
However, I have just realized that some of the clients I will be working with know my mother, and some may be in regular contact with her. While I am being allowed to use a preferred first name, they are not allowing a powder last name. My last name is very distinctive, and is listed on my name badge that I am required to wear at all times while working.
So now I am racing the clock to come out to my mother before any of them ask questions. Unfortunately, I believe that this will out me to some of my clients as well, because my mom constantly talks about me to everyone.
My mother has schizophrenia, and I have been very worried that coming out to her could set off a psychotic episode or even her rejection of me as her child (not because of a lack of acceptance, but because of a delusion that could make her believe that I am literally not her child).
Does anyone have advice for:
- Coming out before you wanted to?
- Coming out to a relative with a delusional disorder?
- Coming out to clients with mental illness who may not be accepting, but who need to respect my authority in order for me to keep my job?
I am wondering whether to just backtrack with HR and ask for a name badge with my birth name, however I am not sure I will be able to do this in time. And it's not exactly my favorite option anyway...
Please help if you can. Don't assume that your advice will be unhelpful if it doesn't specifically answer one of my questions - anything helps. Thanks.
Btw, I am FTM, so male pronouns if rederring to me, please.
