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Started by Wild Flower, December 27, 2014, 07:30:09 AM

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Wild Flower

I am not out to my family... but its like I go on the internet, and they post pics of me knowing full well I hate being on the internet (no facebook or social media site) and knowing I hated it when they were taking pics. I look absolutely miserable in some of them.

Funny thing is.... when I had long hair 1.5 yrs ago... no pics. Because my job requires me to cut my hair... its like im handsome again. ... to them. I feel ugly in all in them.... since I usually look my most masc around them (no hair tints or eyebrow fixes). They know that I hate my job... but they make it seem I love my job.

Theyre in love with someone Im not.... im not that guy.

I had no girlfriend all my life.... but they think im still straight. Like im going to get married any day. Im nearing my mid 20s.... its not going to happen.

They cried when they found out i was living with a man... i lied and coveres that story up.... but every now and then they being it up.... But the older I get the less I care.
"Anyone who believes what a cat tells him deserves all he gets."
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Zoetrope

Dreadful situation :~(

I hope you don't have to tolerate it for much longer. You are you, a real person - not a figment of someone else's imagination ...

Sarah x
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Wild Flower

Quote from: SarahBoo on December 27, 2014, 07:37:07 AM
Dreadful situation :~(

I hope you don't have to tolerate it for much longer. You are you, a real person - not a figment of someone else's imagination ...

Sarah x

Well its my fault... but they know me (yet they discard what Im really am... like its too shameful to acknowledge).

Rose color glasses are very strong. At this point... they should know and leave me alone about all this straightness.

My life is like just one illusion.
"Anyone who believes what a cat tells him deserves all he gets."
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Zoetrope

It doesn't have to be your burden as well, though ...

I came out to my folks early this year. It did not go down well, but I was expecting that. They had decided long ago 'who I was' - but I've gone and turned that all upside down.

It's cost me dearly. We don't talk at all anymore.

But while they continue to ruminate and cling - I am now free at last.


It's your choice who you live for - nobody else's. A very difficult choice, but also one of the most important ones you'll make ...
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Mikaela

Wow!
I guess three things.
One, does anyone understand that being accused of being an a  attractive male is like getting kicked in the head? Its an insult,  not a compliment.

Two, even though my family actually KNOWS that I can not be with a woman, physicall, they still wonder at my attraction to males. I have had to deal with honest curiosity for two days now. We ARE who we are. They don't understand. Do you understand them? I don't. 45 years with the illusion of being male and I don't understand men at.all, and have no desire to.

Three, the older I get the less I care will be a recurring theme, and.has nothing to do with being trans. That is a sentiment that you should get used to.

Endure, those that can accept, will in time. Those that can't, never will.
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Zoetrope

Hmm ...

I think that, while some of the things people say can be offensive - often what is said is not intended to be an insult.

That's a different thing to having a closed door altogether, or being deliberately cruel.


I think we should be patient and graceful as we can, toward those who do not intend to offend, but do.

Be the person to offer the bridge. Don't be the one to burn it.

As for the closed doors, simply walk away. Don't kick it or leave something nasty on the doorstep.


Sarah :~o
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Wild Flower

Quote from: Mikaela on December 27, 2014, 08:23:00 AM
Wow!
I guess three things.
One, does anyone understand that being accused of being an a  attractive male is like getting kicked in the head? Its an insult,  not a compliment.

Two, even though my family actually KNOWS that I can not be with a woman, physicall, they still wonder at my attraction to males. I have had to deal with honest curiosity for two days now. We ARE who we are. They don't understand. Do you understand them? I don't. 45 years with the illusion of being male and I don't understand men at.all, and have no desire to.

Three, the older I get the less I care will be a recurring theme, and.has nothing to do with being trans. That is a sentiment that you should get used to.

Endure, those that can accept, will in time. Those that can't, never will.

Yep. Well Im not even handsome... I was handsome because I look very masculine in those pics. But I would make a far more beautiful woman than even my best days as a guy (which to me when I look my most feminine...).

I understand guys to an extent but I could never act like a guy... its like feminity reeks out of my pores. The only time I act like a guy is when Im quiet... at all family functions in the past Im usually a mute.
"Anyone who believes what a cat tells him deserves all he gets."
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