Cant find any friends :/

[ali.yo1991]

Hi! I just want to start out by saying my transition is going awesomely and quite happy. There has been one aspect though that has been lacking. Before I started my transition I used to be a pretty popular, jock-like kind of person. I used to go out and party or go to bars and have fun. When I came out all my "friends" slowly started to stop talking to me and really kinda forced me out of their lives. My girlfriend at the time left me and and I moved in with a co worker and he was kind of an a**hole. So I moved back in with my mother to save money for my transition and really get back on my feet. I absolutely love my mom and shes super supportive and im glad shes been there for me. After moving in though I really had her and no one else for a support group. After living here for 2 years I still really haven't found any friends. Ive tried going on dating sites to meet people but that went as expected pretty much "hey lets be friends!" And then they start asking for sex woohoo lol. I only text 2 people in my phone and I havent even met them irl yet haha. One of the people I text told me I should just go out to a bar and get out there and I would but I live in western mass and its kinda more sketchy here than out near boston much more gun touting rednecks haha. I went to a transgender support group and although it was very helpful I was the youngest by far at 23. It just kinda sucks not being able to go out and do stuff with someone. Ive pretty much been a shut in for two years just working, go home, netflix, sleep rinse and repeat. My social skills have kinda plummeted and I get nervous with talking to new people as if im gonna say something stupid. Well that rant is over haha just needed to bitch and moan a bit sorry. Again im hella happy about my transition and im happy in general its just I wish I had a couple of close friends to go to the mall or something lol.

Oh yeah and im taking my certification test to become a phlebotomist tomorrow and im soooooooo nervous so wish me luck!!!

[Sammy]

Well, if You insist, then good luck with Your exam (not that You really need it, cause You know all that stuff already. Maybe just a bit of lucky to get easier questions, lol?)
As far as Your main issue, I kinda feel for You - it just happens because You changed Your social life preferences and thus Your friends and acquaintances drifted away with them. How about finding a new hobby or interest? Hitting gym/getting a dog/taking photography courses or something like that? Work-home-work can become very much a routine from which it is quite hard to get out. I have the same problem - on most days apart of colleagues at work and calling my mom, I dont have any other non-online people to talk to, and sometimes it sucks - my method is finally starting to work, albeit kinda slowly. But with regard to friends and acquaintances it is quality not quantity which matters.

[ali.yo1991]

Thank you for the vote of confidence!  Lol I really needed that I just cant wait to be done with it. But yeah ive been trying to find more hobbies. I actually am trying to get into roller derby and ive gone to a few practices and everyone seems very nice. Its just ive been alone for so long that I just dont know how to talk to people anymore and I kinda freeze up or start a sentence without actually knowing how im gonna finish it lol. Im thinking roller derby is gonna help a lot but we shall see. Im also thinking about starting my vlog on youtube back up or maybe start a twitch acount and do some lets plays. Im sure everything will work out

[CaptFido87]

hi Ali,

You got a friend in me, literally. Though we probably live no wehere close; I just want you to know you can talk to me anytime if you'd like.

[ali.yo1991]

hi Ali,

You got a friend in me, literally. Though we probably live no wehere close; I just want you to know you can talk to me anytime if you'd like.

Awwww thank you! That actually really means a lot

[VikingArchangel]

If you play ESO at all, I'm getting back into the Pact side rp community. PM me and I'll send you my game handle!

[Jasper93]

Hi! I just want to start out by saying my transition is going awesomely and quite happy. There has been one aspect though that has been lacking. Before I started my transition I used to be a pretty popular, jock-like kind of person. I used to go out and party or go to bars and have fun. When I came out all my "friends" slowly started to stop talking to me and really kinda forced me out of their lives. My girlfriend at the time left me and and I moved in with a co worker and he was kind of an a**hole. So I moved back in with my mother to save money for my transition and really get back on my feet. I absolutely love my mom and shes super supportive and im glad shes been there for me. After moving in though I really had her and no one else for a support group. After living here for 2 years I still really haven't found any friends. Ive tried going on dating sites to meet people but that went as expected pretty much "hey lets be friends!" And then they start asking for sex woohoo lol. I only text 2 people in my phone and I havent even met them irl yet haha. One of the people I text told me I should just go out to a bar and get out there and I would but I live in western mass and its kinda more sketchy here than out near boston much more gun touting rednecks haha. I went to a transgender support group and although it was very helpful I was the youngest by far at 23. It just kinda sucks not being able to go out and do stuff with someone. Ive pretty much been a shut in for two years just working, go home, netflix, sleep rinse and repeat. My social skills have kinda plummeted and I get nervous with talking to new people as if im gonna say something stupid. Well that rant is over haha just needed to bitch and moan a bit sorry. Again im hella happy about my transition and im happy in general its just I wish I had a couple of close friends to go to the mall or something lol.

Oh yeah and im taking my certification test to become a phlebotomist tomorrow and im soooooooo nervous so wish me luck!!!

Good luck on the exam! And yeah, I'm kind of facing the same predicament; I came out about being trans and lost a lot of friends... I attend a gigantic university, though, so replacing those old relationships isn't impossible, as there are many like myself.  But it does kind of make me contemplate my future and how things will work out for me. It's paramount that I live in a city, for example, as opposed to the dinky little town in which I was raised.  I also reflect a lot on how it's going to be difficult to find actual relationships, as opposed to just being a fling for most guys.  It's kind of dehumanizing in a way, but I have to be me, so I manage... Yeah, I can totally relate to your post.  I hope it gets better for you!

Alice

[ali.yo1991]

If you play ESO at all, I'm getting back into the Pact side rp community. PM me and I'll send you my game handle!

Are you spying on me! I was soooo looking to get into a mmo but sadly I dont have a good computer and really dont have enough money to drop 600 bucks for a comp. I have a ps4 though! Lol

[ali.yo1991]

Good luck on the exam! And yeah, I'm kind of facing the same predicament; I came out about being trans and lost a lot of friends... I attend a gigantic university, though, so replacing those old relationships isn't impossible, as there are many like myself.  But it does kind of make me contemplate my future and how things will work out for me. It's paramount that I live in a city, for example, as opposed to the dinky little town in which I was raised.  I also reflect a lot on how it's going to be difficult to find actual relationships, as opposed to just being a fling for most guys.  It's kind of dehumanizing in a way, but I have to be me, so I manage... Yeah, I can totally relate to your post.  I hope it gets better for you!

Alice

Oh by the way I passed my exam! Woohooo im a licensed phlebotomist! (Aka vampire lol) but yeah my podunk lil town is kinda like a black hole. I just dont really feel safe being out in public too much. Im thinking of going a couple towns over and going to a gay bar. Idk I just feel like I need to get out there and maybe someone might surprise me and actually talk to me.

[Jasper93]

Oh by the way I passed my exam! Woohooo im a licensed phlebotomist! (Aka vampire lol) but yeah my podunk lil town is kinda like a black hole. I just dont really feel safe being out in public too much. Im thinking of going a couple towns over and going to a gay bar. Idk I just feel like I need to get out there and maybe someone might surprise me and actually talk to me.

My hometown, which I've been returning to for Winter Break since I began college, is very conservative, so -- even though I present as male right now -- I gotta watch my back while in public because of how the people here are.  There are like 10,000 people -- most of which are closed-minded lol.  Congratulations on achieving vampire status! Yes, go to a gay bar if you feel that that's a good option for you!

[VikingArchangel]

Are you spying on me! I was soooo looking to get into a mmo but sadly I dont have a good computer and really dont have enough money to drop 600 bucks for a comp. I have a ps4 though! Lol

*cackles madly*
Turn all graphics settings to their minimum values, then play with the available options until you find a configuration you like. I do this myself. If the game lets you run it, then your system can handle SOME configuration. *hugs*

[Alysinspace]

ali if you want we can play ps4
my psn is Alleselina : ) what games do you play?

[ImagineKate]

I came out to a few friends. Haven't lost any. They are all accepting.

However I'd say any "friends" who shun you are never really your friends. You have to look at it that way. Real friends stick around for the marathon.