the dreaded question

[boywonder159]

okay, so i am an open book, i welcome all questions about being trans* that people ask me and i try to answer to the best of my ability. but there is one question i loath: How do you have sex?  Oh deary me, do i hate that question, i don't know how to answer anymore. i used to get into a weird pose and say something like "like this but imagine me holding a rubber chicken in my mouth" something stupid and funny. but then i got to the point were i would say something like "well, i still have my lady parts so i use that, sometimes i dont use it and blah blah blah" but now i cant even answer by being honest, i get angry and just walk away now. I do not think this is an appropiate question, i understand if you are curious but how someone has sex is none your business. GRRR this question really grinds my gears.

[Peacebone]

No, it's not an appropriate question. It's really disrespectful of you and your boundaries.

I occasionally make reference to the fact I have toys, but never to the actual act of sex. I think that especially for trans* people, our personal boundaries, what we call our body parts and the mentality to how we can have sex may be different to what a lot of people expect?

[mrs izzy]

I always turned it around and same as you.

No bodies businesses.

[boywonder159]

its so annoying, i mean do some people just forget how to have sex when meeting a trans*person? And I get this from people who know you dont need a penis and vagina to have sex (mean when put together) and some sexual questions i welcome like "do you still use your vagina for sexual purposes?" or "what if you want to top "(im gay) and i will be honest and explain anything, but dont ask HOW especially if i dont know you really.

[mrs izzy]

I was mtf, my hubby was ftm and got that question asked to us.

Hmm guess no one explained the birds and bees to them?

[boywonder159]

the funniest ones are when i do pass and people ask how my cis boyfriend and i have sex... He just simply says "we touch tips very gently"

[mrs izzy]

 

the funniest ones are when i do pass and people ask how my cis boyfriend and i have sex... He just simply says "we touch tips very gently"

[suzifrommd]

okay, so i am an open book, i welcome all questions about being trans* that people ask me and i try to answer to the best of my ability. but there is one question i loath: How do you have sex?  Oh deary me, do i hate that question, i don't know how to answer anymore. i used to get into a weird pose and say something like "like this but imagine me holding a rubber chicken in my mouth" something stupid and funny. but then i got to the point were i would say something like "well, i still have my lady parts so i use that, sometimes i dont use it and blah blah blah" but now i cant even answer by being honest, i get angry and just walk away now. I do not think this is an appropiate question, i understand if you are curious but how someone has sex is none your business. GRRR this question really grinds my gears.

"We are creative."

Answers the question without revealing any embarrassing details.