News!

[Maxwell]

Well, I have gym but we can change it to boys and are trying to now and trying to transition in school. I'm super excited and after a lot of thinking told my friends. They
said they didn't seem anything wrong with it so we're all good. Most of what I'm trying to do is male pronouns and being male in school. I'm really excited about it all.

Now for the problems,
My sister and papi know and my papi said he would leave my family when I change. My sister says she understands it, but no matter what I'm talking bout if it's anything to do with my
transness she immediately starts yelling at my and getting irritated. She is one of those people that I feel if you gave them forever would still get super mad. I know she doesn't want
me to do anything. It will get awkward though yaknow? Everyone at school calls me Max and when I transition as male she's still gonna be calling me my birth name and 'sister'.

The worst thing is she screams it out at lunch in front of everyone, my friends always look so awkward too. I got guy underwear (best idea ever) and at 15 my mom said we can go see
how about getting T. Going to a actual gender therapist than my regular therapist that does know and I've been going to for bout 5 and a half years but I don't really know if she could write it.
Or who I'd really go to get it. My 15th is coming up very soon so I'm excited but when I'm full guy mode I will see my sister or go out somewhere and they will call me a girl and so on.
What do I do? Any help for any of the problems I got?

[Ms Grace]

Hi - it's great you have some support in some areas of your life, like your mother and your friends. Some people take longer than others to come around, and some never do - it's a testament to the stubbornness of some people's prejudices. I don't know if you have any other siblings but it's very possible your sister doesn't like the idea of having a brother since that can really change the family dynamic. Plus she's still young, irrational and unpleasant reactions are a fairly common coping mechanisms when people feel powerless to change something they don't like or understand. Maybe a counselling session with both you and her might help her to air her fears. My sister (and I'm talking many years older than yours) is "supportive" of me but still won't let her daughter know about me let alone see me. Some people are just not as supportive as they'd like to think they are. Give it time (and by time I mean months if not years) and she will hopefully come around eventually.

[Maxwell]

Hi - it's great you have some support in some areas of your life, like your mother and your friends. Some people take longer than others to come around, and some never do - it's a testament to the stubbornness of some people's prejudices. I don't know if you have any other siblings but it's very possible your sister doesn't like the idea of having a brother since that can really change the family dynamic. Plus she's still young, irrational and unpleasant reactions are a fairly common coping mechanisms when people feel powerless to change something they don't like or understand. Maybe a counselling session with both you and her might help her to air her fears. My sister (and I'm talking many years older than yours) is "supportive" of me but still won't let her daughter know about me let alone see me. Some people are just not as supportive as they'd like to think they are. Give it time (and by time I mean months if not years) and she will hopefully come around eventually.

I tried but she doesn't talk at all when I do bring her, and throws fits when I even mention her coming with me.
Also I REALLY wanted to tell my biological dad even though I don't like him because he gets kinda stubborn, thinking he can tell me to do whatever or discipline me when he's about 10 hours away
but he is also the gossiper of my family and my aunt went to my papsi(step father with us now) mom and trash talked my mom almost getting a divorce.

He gets mad ANY  time I bring it up because he always says he can trust him, I'm not stupid it was probably about 1 and a half years ago but I only see him ONCE a year in summer,
so it's the only interactions I have with him. All my interaction with him are almost always bad and he always lies to me. I want to tell he rest of my family because its weird
and I dread my birthday cards because they are all girly and for daughters etc. I NEED to tell them though because when I fully transition and go to visit with a deeper voice
I can't explain it then. Just strange. What to do?

[suzifrommd]

Maxwell, you're in a bad situation. Understand that, and give yourself credit for living under difficult circumstances. If I'm understanding you properly, your stepfather is threatening to leave your family because you are transitioning. If that's the case, I can't begin to speak about how very wrong that is. Your sister is also being unsupportive in a highly public way. It may be that she needs educating, which perhaps your Mom can help with, but it's still very hard to deal with.

My suggestion is to find as many adult allies as you can. If there are teachers, counselors, or anyone else at your school you think will understand, try to reach out to them. This is hard for an adult to go through with a supportive family, harder even for a young person when you'rer family is troublesome.

Good luck, Maxwell, and hugs. Please keep posting here.

[Maxwell]

Maxwell, you're in a bad situation. Understand that, and give yourself credit for living under difficult circumstances. If I'm understanding you properly, your stepfather is threatening to leave your family because you are transitioning. If that's the case, I can't begin to speak about how very wrong that is. Your sister is also being unsupportive in a highly public way. It may be that she needs educating, which perhaps your Mom can help with, but it's still very hard to deal with.

My suggestion is to find as many adult allies as you can. If there are teachers, counselors, or anyone else at your school you think will understand, try to reach out to them. This is hard for an adult to go through with a supportive family, harder even for a young person when you'rer family is troublesome.

Good luck, Maxwell, and hugs. Please keep posting here.

Thank you.    I'll stay posted.