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A realization about my interest in guys.

Started by Jasriella, March 11, 2015, 08:07:00 PM

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Jasriella

I could definitely use some input from some people who've been happily married for x amount of years.

I've never really been sexually attracted to men, except my best friend growing up but I would never have dared risk our friendship over it. There are some guys I think are cute or pretty hot but the thought of even kissing them is a pretty big turnoff. There's only one man that can get me in the mood or that I'm sexually attracted too and we've been together for 3 years now.

Is it that deep love for him that makes it appalling in my mind to even think about other guys for the most part?
"Bravery is the capacity to perform properly when scared half to death.



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Wild Flower

Hm. When I love a guy.... other guys dimmed in comparison even if they are more attractive or better. They are like pallid to me, and  I dont feel desire. It takes a lot of things and traits to make me attractive to a guy. But they might as well be women if Im not into them (no desire for women).

Im very monogamous about love at the end.
"Anyone who believes what a cat tells him deserves all he gets."
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AndreaLinda

I think for myself is more about personalities. If we have the same humor,  nice looks and we get along, I might just end up liking him
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Jasriella

It's just an odd feeling because I never noticed this before till recently even with the women I dated.
"Bravery is the capacity to perform properly when scared half to death.



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Ms Grace

When I was at school I had a crush on one of the boys. It was inexplicable to me, I didn't think of myself as gay because of it but I was utterly infatuated with him for many, many months. But he's the only male I've ever felt that way about. He was quite shy and a bit "girly" so that might explain it...?
Grace
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Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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Jasriella

Well this isn't a crush type thing, I'm confused about my own sexuality. I'm more interested in women sexually but with guys they have to be very special to me to have any sexual interest in. My best friend growing up being one and of course my current boyfriend.
"Bravery is the capacity to perform properly when scared half to death.



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mfox

There are few things I like more than nuzzling into my man's neck, ever since I started HRT something about it drives me crazy.  We've been together for a while and it's definitely something that's changed.  I wouldn't be surprised if someone in transition began to find themselves drawn more to male pheromones. :)
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noleen111

The hormones must affect us.. remember when young girls start developing the hormones make then start noticing guys... we take the same hormones.. ok ours are artificially introduced with HRT.. but they must have an affect on us in a similar way.. or at least some affect.

me personally.. i started becoming attracted to guys during HRT.. I had never been attracted to men before HRT.. Now i have a wonderful boyfriend.. and love been held by him and i love it when he makes love to me..
Enjoying ride the hormones are giving me... finally becoming the woman I always knew I was
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Autumnleaf

I have to know, is this a typical experience for most people that start on HRT?  Like does it make you see guys differently?  Because I'm definitely NOT attracted to guys, never have been, and don't want to be. 
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Cindy

I think going on HRT magnifies your preferences. I could never accept myself as a Gay man, but I have no troubles being a straight woman. How to explain that? No idea.

I do not think HRT changes anything but along the acceptance route, we accept.
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suzifrommd

Quote from: Cindy on March 14, 2015, 04:04:07 AM
I think going on HRT magnifies your preferences. I could never accept myself as a Gay man, but I have no troubles being a straight woman. How to explain that? No idea.

I feel the same way, Cindy.

My GT has a theory that there are some people that are just straight. When they are in a male role, they gravitate toward females. When they're in a female role, males start looking good.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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Wild Flower

Quote from: Cindy on March 14, 2015, 04:04:07 AM
I think going on HRT magnifies your preferences. I could never accept myself as a Gay man, but I have no troubles being a straight woman. How to explain that? No idea.

I do not think HRT changes anything but along the acceptance route, we accept.

Yep... straight women preferences too.. height is number one deal breaker.
"Anyone who believes what a cat tells him deserves all he gets."
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Phoenix_2812

I'm not transitiong yet but I have noticed for some time now that I sometimes feel some sort of attraction towards men. Much like Cindy, I couldn't accept myself as being gay either (not that I have anything against gay people, I happen to be open to many different forms of relationships). I know that I'm not gay, I've figured that part out for myself without any help, I like to think of myself as Asexual, but these feelings remain all the same.

Chris
"When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us." -Helen Keller
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Jasriella

I guess sexually I'm pansexual, best term for it anyway. And that's great news that HRT doesn't "change" your orientation but more so "magnifies" it. I already get those butterfly feelings and a few other of those wonderful thing when I'm with my boyfriend especially when we're cuddling, can't imagine how it's going to feel with HRT.
"Bravery is the capacity to perform properly when scared half to death.



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Aubrey1day

I have used the online world (MMOrpg's, forums, and chat rooms) as my coping mechanism and as a method of self discovery since I was 17-18 ish. Even now I have male friends online, one specifically that the true me is just almost in love with. I adore him even when he is being a stereotypical male, when he just treats me like the woman I am. When he is being a little pushy or overly forward and I have to tell him to dream on.

I feel like I have two people in my head, the true me that recently yelled at the top of her lungs "Stop! Before you give up let me out, trust in me for once." and the me that is the facade that I show the world because I feel that it is the only version of me that they would accept. (Until recently at least) The facade, my male side feels almost appalled at the prospect of being with a man. It was a very confusing thing for me to sort out but I think I have it figured out for the most part.



"The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance." - Alan Watts
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jessical

Quote from: Cindy on March 14, 2015, 04:04:07 AM
I think going on HRT magnifies your preferences. I could never accept myself as a Gay man, but I have no troubles being a straight woman. How to explain that? No idea.

I do not think HRT changes anything but along the acceptance route, we accept.

I agree with Cindy.  Shifts can occur on HRT, but it depends greatly on your preferences before.  If someone before HRT was 40% into men and 60% into women (and just dated women).  After starting HRT it might be 60% men and 40% women.  But there are other factors as well.  Being on HRT (even if you are not out) men will treat you differently.  Especially so, when you are presenting as female.  And they will treat you very differently than a gay male would treat another man.  The effects is that men can make you feel feminine.  The other is that because we are making such a big life change when we start transitioning it gives us license to reflect on other aspects of life.  One of them being thinking about ones sexuality.

For me personally at the moment, I am primarily attracted to women.  But I did experience a shift, to the point where I will find myself ranking men on how attractive they are.  At the moment it is not enough that I would consider dating a man, but a definite shift.

It was something that I worried about before staring HRT, but now I am very zen about it, way more than I ever was in my life.
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Christine Eryn

I've always been attracted to females, and before HRT never ever liked males. Sometimes there is that guy that catches my attention. I saw Ricky Martin on TV the other day and I went holy ->-bleeped-<-, :icon_eek: that's a good looking man. Out in public I usually don't give guys second looks, I still like a women's ass in tight jeans. Although now I try to figure out how to implement their wardrobe into mine.
"There was a sculptor, and he found this stone, a special stone. He dragged it home and he worked on it for months, until he finally finished. When he was ready he showed it to his friends and they said he had created a great statue. And the sculptor said he hadn't created anything, the statue was always there, he just cleared away the small peices." Rambo III
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Eva Marie

I liked/preferred women before I transitioned and that hasn't changed. What has changed is that now I let myself notice guys and dang there are some cute ones out there  :laugh: If I had my choice I prefer women... but the idea of being with a cute guy is not quite as far fetched as is used to be.
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Jill F

I'm trans and therefore beyond queer anyway.  I just like who I like, go with the flow and don't get stuck on labels.
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Laurie K

I found  at puberty that I started to like boys but did not act on it untill my early twenties. when I did have a one nighter with a man  I was over come with giult and went back to women. Later on when I went on HRT  the first time, I found that l started to notice men more.  I since had a relationship with a total gentleman for 5 years that  has since ended  but Iwill continue to look for a boyfriend . As a man didnt like like the stereotypical man takes charge, man is the agressor role. As a woman  I like  being submissive and being made love to. I can also make love and please a man , be the agressor, but it is on my terms  ;D




The ball is now rolling....I hope it doesnt run me 0ver
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