My experience was a lot like Sam's. With some of Ayden's too. I first went to a decent stylist and got it all chopped off and very androgynous. I went in with a bunch of pictures, male, female, and androgynous and said these were what I liked. She did ask me why, but I actually do respect her for it. I have very curly hair and you can pretty much only do long or ultra short with it. If I changed my mind it would be years of awful hair to undo it. But I told her that my long "pretty" hair wasn't me and I wanted to finally be me and she went right to work after that. I'm in Asia as well so gender cues are a bit different and I was immediately read as male with the androgynous cut. When it came time for a trim, I walked into random hair cutting place, and gestured for the length I wanted. The guy read me as male and gave me a very standard male cut.
I think going somewhere they expect you to be male would help a lot. If your voice will give you away, can you pull off teen boy? It may not feel very empowering to play that young, but having the right haircut makes up for it. I still do a doubletake at the difference when I see myself and it's been the difference of not passing at all to passing 90%+ for me. When looking at possible barbers, pay attention to what other guys are looking like. Is he giving everyone the same exact cut? Scissors or clippers? Someone who is cutting to the individual with scissors is more likely to do well with you. Especially pre-t, we don't tend to look good buzzed, it can make you look more female. A talented barber with scissors can flatter your face to look more male.
