I think the grass/fence analogy is flawed for a few reasons:
1. The grass/fence analogy implies an objective comparison is possible should you remove the fence and compare the grass.
2. It implies a false duality, as I believe your experience with the other side would evolve as you do. It'd be like an infinite number of grassplots separated by an infinite number of fences, which would make comparison to discrete plots' states meaningless. It's the journey that continually redefines you as a person with your experience filtered through your evolving identity.
3. We're essentially comparing apples and oranges, based on contextualized and individual experiences.
4. We can never really know the experience of the sweet sweet cisgender grass on the other side.
Our perception of the other side is filtered through our biases. Even when we present as our chosen gender, and are treated as our chosen gender, our biases color our perception of that experience.
If I could have enjoyed being perceived as male, then I would have enjoyed the male privilege. It's also somewhat scarring when the only companionship you are offered with your preferred friend-group (i.e. women in my case) is sexualized. Because our society is hetero-cisnormative, there are limitations to the roles we are given and adapt to. Either you can do that, or you rebel and face varying levels of ostracization. I could rail about how unfair both sides can be, or I can just be happy I'm able to be a more genuine version of myself now that I'm not hiding my femininity.
