I guess I should give some sort of back round story. well, I've been in therapy for close to a year now. at first it was just some sort of fascination but things started to escalated to a point that I felt something missing. when I was around 14, I blurted out to my mom on the way hom that I wanted to change my sex. of course I've said this before but that time felt different, kinda felt real. so my mom said sure knowing that I was only joking but she looked at me and could tell I was serious. well years past and it happened when I turned 17. since I didn't have insurance or money to afford anything, I had to put it on the back burner. last year I finally got serious because I was overrun with social issues plus I had to find a therapist because it was mandated that I see one at least once a week. long story short, I started therapy and my therapist is really cool and said whenever I was ready or I figure out what I am and need, he'd help me. however I'm just not so sure at all even after all this time. in my mind its just some fascination gone extreme but my heart says its real. I'm just beyond torn. so I came here looking and hoping to find some answers if any
