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Just a little advice - The Head

Started by The_Gentleboy, April 17, 2015, 01:54:04 PM

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The_Gentleboy

So I thought Id give some advice. These have worked for me, they may not work for you. Don't take me too seriously, I'm not a serious person. Enjoy.


The Head:

Hair:
Ive personally found that short-medium hair is the best. Not too much maintenance but can style quite easily.

Dont buzz it off unless you're confident you can pull it off. Its a style adopted by butch lesbians and you may get percieved to be one.

Dont preen it. I personally found the longer i spent doing my hair, the more feminine, people saw me.

Bedhead. Always works. Ive adopted this style, it seems to show laziness. BUT Dont try if you're attempting to get laid it minimises your chances greatly. (unless you're hot, then you're fine regardless)

Really long spikes. It looks cool until you take someones eye out. (and then they cant see how cool you look)

Hair colour. Try to stay natural. Straight guys dont tend to colour their hair pink/blue/green etc. If you're not straight however go for it. The world needs way more colour!

choose a hairstyle for your face shape too. Certain cuts suit certain faces!


Glasses:

Dont oversize them, korean girls have set a trend with big black square glasses. If you're pre-T, this style of glasses may harm your passibility. If you can go for a slightly smaller frame,(about 1.5 inch)

Contacts can make you pass better (but not always)

If you need glasses do wear them. If you accidently fall into an uncovered manhole because you couldn't see it, the paramedics may unintentionally out you.


Skin:
Look after it, Acne is a pain in the ass but if you can, get it cleared up. (will increase chances of getting laid by sexy people - GUARANTEED)

Facial Hair:

I'm all for beards but caveman is so not hot right now! Trim it now-and-again.

If you're gonna use the fake stuff, glue it properly and don't stay out in the sun. Don't ask me how you're going to explain why your moustache is sliding down your face like a slug and why your beard has started swimming laps in your margarita.


General:

You may not like the baby-face now but when you're 50 you'll have so many young admirers. Plus cheaper bus/train fares! Cheaper entry into theme parks. Order happy meals from McD's without being judged! Free stuff from nice people (but stay away from the strange ones giving you white smarties, they're not really smarties!)

SMILE - confidence will outshine the haters and make you feel good. (and if you're ever down say bubbles in an angry voice. You wont be sad for long!)

Hope this helps. Please take it with a pinch of salt. Feel free to add or change this list.
Yours
Gentleboy
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FTMax

As far as appearance advice goes, I think it's different for everyone. Any of the advice you listed could be hit or miss. I think it's best when someone is having trouble passing to post a pic. Then we can see if there's something off about their appearance, or if mannerisms are more likely the issue.

I would say more often than not, it's mannerisms or voice that stop people from passing more than anything appearance wise.
T: 12/5/2014 | Top: 4/21/2015 | Hysto: 2/6/2016 | Meta: 3/21/2017

I don't come here anymore, so if you need to get in touch send an email: maxdoeswork AT protonmail.com
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Adam (birkin)

I think a lot of your advice is on point actually. 

The bedhead approach is like my Bible lol.
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sam1234

Being over fifty, I can say that your statement on having younger admirers is true. I never did have a baby face, but definately look younger than I am.

i'm sure I have run into some transgenders in the area and just don't know it. There is a moderate number of transgenders according to the person who runs the local trans group. i've only seen a couple of people that I have even thought about in terms of whether they are passing or not. Both are very large, have facial hair and wear androgynous clothes, but one refers of herself as her bird's "mom". i try not to use pronouns with them because they could just as easily be same sex guys and were joking about the "mom" thing.

sam1234
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The_Gentleboy

Quote from: ftmax on April 17, 2015, 02:22:51 PM
As far as appearance advice goes, I think it's different for everyone. Any of the advice you listed could be hit or miss. I think it's best when someone is having trouble passing to post a pic. Then we can see if there's something off about their appearance, or if mannerisms are more likely the issue.

I would say more often than not, it's mannerisms or voice that stop people from passing more than anything appearance wise.

It was just a generic list for anyone wandering around in a clueless manner more than anything. Mannerisms depend on your vicinity, class and personality. For example (stereotypically speaking) someone from a city ghetto is more likely to have a swagger compared to a country kid who wont have one. Someone of a poorer background may use double negatives in speech or use more slang, compared to someone whose more wealthy and speaks pronounced English. Personality wise, gangsters dont act the same way as Emos.

i cant really help with voice as I haven't had any issues personally, and i generally have no clue as how to help a person lower or higher their voice, I think the best way for that would be a professional voice coach. I know mannerisms and voice are important but you could have the deepest voice in the world, with the most bad-ass swagger but ultimately if you look feminine you'll still be perceived as female. However I do get your gist about being outed by your voice, if I find something that may help with people's voices, I'll be sure to post it.The photo idea makes sense but not everyone is comfortable putting their photo online, especially given our situation. I know I'm not! And there are certain bloggers who will use those photos to justify their own cause and harm vulnerable people.


Quote from: birkin on April 17, 2015, 03:01:53 PM
I think a lot of your advice is on point actually. 

The bedhead approach is like my Bible lol.

Thanks for the compliments, Birkin. Funnily enough since I've adopted the bedhead hairstyle Ive actually become a lot more comfortable with my mirrored reflection! Before I was kinda ugh and now im like "yeah that actually looks a lot like me" plus it shows my personality, -wild,carefree and a little lazy!

Quote from: sam1234 on April 17, 2015, 06:28:21 PM
Being over fifty, I can say that your statement on having younger admirers is true. I never did have a baby face, but definately look younger than I am.

i'm sure I have run into some transgenders in the area and just don't know it. There is a moderate number of transgenders according to the person who runs the local trans group. i've only seen a couple of people that I have even thought about in terms of whether they are passing or not. Both are very large, have facial hair and wear androgynous clothes, but one refers of herself as her bird's "mom". i try not to use pronouns with them because they could just as easily be same sex guys and were joking about the "mom" thing.

sam1234


Sounds like looking young is definitely a good thing when you're a little older, which is excellent news for me since im heading that way! Passing is an unusual thing, especially when you walk by a friend and you dont even recognise them (thats happened on so many occasions). If you aren't sure of a person's gender, rendering them genderless in conversation is an excellent call! That way neither of you get into awkward, uncomfortable spaces and you cant occidentally out them or impede their safety. I know what you mean about the 'mom' thing though some of my mates call each other sisters as a joke, despite stating their gender is male. It makes for confusing times, especially in public



Yours
Gentleboy
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sam1234

Part of passing is instinctual. Since we are the gender we identify with, mannerisms often just come naturally. I never had to try to walk like a guy, I just did. In school, where the guys tended to carry their books at their sides and the girls carried them up higher in front of them, i just automatically carried them at my side. That caused some taunting, but it felt unnatural to carry them up higher.

I may be wrong on this, but it seems to me that growing up a M to F would be harder. No one thinks much about a "girl" who acts like a Tom boy, at least for a while, but a boy in a girls body who naturally has a girl's walk and mannerisms is more likely to take some physical abuse.

No matter how much other people try to change us, we are what we are. Its ingrained and not something we can just be "treated" out of.

sam1234
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Maleth

This is some good advice. I agree with the buzzcut being kind of risky especially (unless you can really pull it off) and that bedhead looks good. I actually wear my hair very neatly most days to school but I wore it messy once (showered the night before and forgot to comb in the morning lol) and everyone was complimenting me and saying I looked really good. Worked well for me.
~Maleth
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The_Gentleboy

I actually agree with most of that sam. Although I have met a few who had been...conditioned so to speak by very strict parents with very rigid views ie no pants only dresses that sort of thing. And some that forced themselves to do the female thing that the natural male thing was totally obscured.


Hey Maleth
I usually cringe at most pics of pre-t ftms with a buzz because 99% cannot pull it off. Messy bed head always gets me the best results. I look like a laid back guy but the minute i put it neat i get the "is that a girl or a guy?" stare or something.

Gentleboy
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Adam (birkin)

Hm, the book example is interesting. Trying to remember how I did it. I know that eventually I did start carrying it up top like the girls but a lot of that was because of my insecurities. I liked having a physical barrier between me and others when I felt anxious because it was comforting. I'm still like that, I need to have a hand on my backpack strap, or a newspaper or umbrella in my hand.
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