Am Having Worries about Transitioning

[Caduti Morte]

I haven't posted in this section of the forum before, I mostly lurk in the non-binary section so I hope this does go here, sorry if it does not.

I have decided that I will transition to male. I thought about it a lot and realize that is something I really want and need to do, of course I realize I still need to talk to a gender therapist and all. I also still have doubts about 'not being trans enough' because I am non-binary.

But anyway, on to my worries...

I'm not exactly sure how much transitioning cost. I've been looking but I can't find a good estimate anywhere. I know its not cheap, and I am not sure what my insurance will or will not cover. I'm 23, but I have had no luck finding a job and I come off my mom's insurance at the age of 25.

I have no idea how much gender therapist cost or where to find one in my state. I know they have online ones but that kinda makes me nervous, nor do I have a private place at my home to have an online session in private.

I also don't know how much hormone treatments cost, or where to find the doctor for that. Currently I don't even have a regular doctor. From what I've seen Top Surgery is around  $8,000 to $15,000 (if ManSculpture is done at same time, which seems like a great idea to me since I have a lot of cellulite/extra flappy skin from rapid weight lost a few years back). That is a hell of a lot of money

And bottom surgery....Okay, originally I said I wasn't going to get this. I didn't feel I needed it, but the more I thought about it the more I realized I wouldn't feel completely whole with out...but then, and I admit this hesitantly because I might get blown up about it, I thought it would mean I would have a very small dick. I have since learned that it is all up to which surgery you get. and that made the idea a little more alluring...and then the price...sticker shock....I am still convinced that the site I got the information from had to be wrong. it said something like $80,000....I could save up my whole life and never afford it.

I feel like I'm thinking myself into a depression. I have no idea where to start or how to start, or how to afford it. Its all a little over whelming, but I don't want it to intimidate me into doing nothing.

Does anyone have any advice?

[ChloëAri]

Have you tried your general practitioner? They may be able to prescribe HRT. Also, I know a lot of Americans on this site get their meds quite inexpensively from Target or Walmart (or both).

As a Canadian I'm not too sure about American insurance. Here, Phalloplasty is covered by the Canadian government (and plenty of FTMs choose not to get it even while it's free which makes 0 sense to me; but I'm not FTM).

I think starting with your GP would be a good starting point. 

[Caduti Morte]

I actually don't have a GP at this time. The one I had moved to a different part of the state, so while she left a replacement I haven't actually gone to see the person.

But I did some looking into my insurance and found that they do cover SRS, one of the few insurances that do in the US. But I can't start HRT unless I see a therapist and have a letter from said therapist. I can't have top surgery with out being on hormones for 12 months and have a letter signed by two therapist, one of which has to be a gender therapist I believe. And bottom surgery will only happen after 12 months of living as desired gender, meaning to be out to everyone including family, friends, co-workers, employers, etc. I also come off my insurance when I turn 25 which is in 2 years, so I would be without insurance in till I can find another. Saying that I already have two auto immune disease, adding that I am in the mist of transitioning will not make finding new insurance easier. 

In America GID is considered a mental illness, and insurance will use that as a way to say that you already have pre-existing condition and use it as away to not cover you.

Maybe I should try moving to Canada lol. They seem to be a head of the game

[kelly_aus]

In America GID is considered a mental illness, and insurance will use that as a way to say that you already have pre-existing condition and use it as away to not cover you.

You might want to double check this, as, while it is listed in the DSM^*, it's not really considered a mental illness any longer.

* The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, the psychistrists guidebook to mental illness.

[Ms Grace]

Sorry, I can't help you with insurance since I'm in Australia. As for the other stuff I think you will find the cost will be steep but my advice is to start at the beginning - find a counsellor or someone else you can talk the issues through with. If you can find a doctor that does informed consent that is great - just make sure you are fully informed first. A counsellor will help you understand the steps and stages that you may need to take and hopefully sort out a timeline. Most guys get on the T first and then look at other surgeries as opportunity and finances allow.

And don't worry about "not being trans enough" - there is no such thing.

[Kellam]

After I got my hrt I looked up how my doctors coded it and they had it all down as a medical condition. Also, here in the U.S., thanks to obamacare, insurers have to cover the patient's needs. Preexisting conditions are no longer a reason to refuse care. Oh, and my hrt is covered too, it was under 20$ for both prescriptions for the month. I don't know what state you're in but in Massachusetts our last governor made all insurers cover trans health surgeries. There is hope! Take care and good luck moving forward.

[Laura_7]

You might think about getting a good gender therapist, and talking it through with them...
you might ask at plannedparenthood, a lgbt center or look for a gender therapist... if they are not supportive you might look for another...

another option might be to say you want counseling, for emotional issues, and look for someone who has gender on their list...
there are even online conselors...
you might ask if they can write a referral for hrt, and how long it usually takes...
unless you want to go the informed consent route...
if its connected with depression it might be covered, or they might offer sliding scales.

Another route is informed consent, where you find an endo, doctor or a gender clinic who go that route.
You could look up where this would be possible in your place.

And you might think about support groups, maybe at lgbt centers.

[Caduti Morte]

When it comes to Trans issues I don't think South Carolina is all that progressive. The only city that I know has a a lgbt center or a gender therapist is Columbia and that is a 2 hour round trip drive.
From what I've read of my insurance's policy on SRS they will cover it, but when I told my brother the type of insurance we have through that company won't. But I have to take everything my brother says with a grain of salt as he likes to think he knows more than he actually does.
In the end I will have to just call the insurance people and asked them myself if I want to be certain. I will have to look for a therapist of some sort in my city as well. I know that there are some who do gender related stuff, but its not their main focus. My main concern is that they will say I'm crazy or try to talk me out of it because I am non-binary. Online therapy is an option I am slowly starting to consider.

[Mariah]

First off a therapist is really a must to help you sort through everything and for the letters especially for the surgeries. Secondly, always refer to your plan and to the insurance directly as to what is and isn't covered. Secondly many things can be coded to get around exclusions. Doctors and therapists try to use those other codes to their advantage to help you get the best care they can. As far as cost that is going to differ based on who you seed, what you need, and what your insurance covers along with where you get your prescriptions. The cost can differ greatly. Good luck and hugs
Mariah

When it comes to Trans issues I don't think South Carolina is all that progressive. The only city that I know has a a lgbt center or a gender therapist is Columbia and that is a 2 hour round trip drive.
From what I've read of my insurance's policy on SRS they will cover it, but when I told my brother the type of insurance we have through that company won't. But I have to take everything my brother says with a grain of salt as he likes to think he knows more than he actually does.
In the end I will have to just call the insurance people and asked them myself if I want to be certain. I will have to look for a therapist of some sort in my city as well. I know that there are some who do gender related stuff, but its not their main focus. My main concern is that they will say I'm crazy or try to talk me out of it because I am non-binary. Online therapy is an option I am slowly starting to consider.

[epicenery]

hi caduti,

i really second laura's suggestion of talking to someone at an LGBT center or trans group in your state. see if you can connect with them. they will know the resources best in the state, such as who to go to for therapist letters and which doctors treat trans patients for hormones. also how name changes and gender marker changes work in SC. if you google "transgender south carolina" or something similar you should be able to find numbers or e-mails for groups.

even though you are non-binary you should also look at FTM resources on this site. if you ask over in their forums they will be able to tell you what they are paying for hormones + supplies and therapy in the US right now.

also you should look into "informed consent" providers-- these don't need therapist letters. i don't know if there are any remotely local to you, though. there are some surgeons out there who will do top surgery by informed consent and i believe there are lists out there of exactly who will do this. (i haven't been current on this info in a while, unfortunately.)

congratulations on deciding to do something to transition; sometimes that decision can be very hard. try not to think about all of the logistics all at once! everyone ends up on their own path as they go through the whole transition process & i'm sure you'll find your way as you take each step.