Attraction toward my own kind?

[BearGuy]

Hey ya'll!
I'm still trying hard to find myself. It's an inner conflict.
Over the years, what I realized was that I DEFINITELY prefer women. The longer time I am on T, the less attraction I feel toward men. It went like this: women all my life, sudden sexual attraction to men between 1-2 years on T, now back to women completely (I am even repulsed when a guy tries to kiss me or anything at gay bars).
BUT. When I meet another trans guy (on testosterone for 1+ years), I suddenly feel both physical and sexual attraction toward him (of course depends on if he is my type).
Is this because homosexuality is dependent upon sex and not gender? I have absolutely no interest in biological men, as I mentioned... but with trans guys, it's as if we are the same.
It's interesting but strange. I am super attracted to women, femininity, everything about girls... but with trans guys, it's a different attraction, and the masculinity actually appeals to me (and greatly so!). On a bio guy, it repels me.

I guess this just really signifies that homosexuality is biological. I am attracted to women, and men who are "like me" (both of which point toward homosexuality).


Ahhh I give up haha. Does anyone else feel the same as I do?

[enigmaticrorschach]

i know the feeling. i'm attracted to both mtf and ftm because of the emotional connection.

[sam1234]

Gender Identity and Sexual identity are two different things. T can give you a stronger sex drive, but it shouldn't change who you are attracted to.

If you are most attracted to transmen, but not cis men, is it possible that you are attracted to what they were? Another possibility is that you had some attraction for men before you started your transition, but did want to fact it. By being attracted to transmen, it might be more acceptable to you emotionally  to be attracted to them because they once had women's bodies.

What ever the reason, don't let it bother you. Its very difficult to control who you are attracted to, and as long as both parties are feel the same, I see nothing wrong with being attracted to men or women.

sam1234

[Ms Grace]

I have seen a couple of trans ladies at the endo's clinic who I would date in a flash if I had the nerves to ask!!

And why not, I like ladies after all!

[FTMax]

I dated two other FTMs before realizing that I was also trans. While I do have a strong preference for women now, being with somebody who gets it is very nice.

[awilliams1701]

I suspect I would be more likely to feel comfortable with a non-op FTM than a cismale or post-op FTM. However currently I only have eyes for the ladies. Mostly fem, but lately butch. I'm keeping an open mind so whatever happens, happens.

[barbie]

Sexual preference of human is so much diverse and even flexible.

barbie~~

[Girl Beyond Doubt]

So far I have only been interested in women, and usually I find men repulsive. But quite recently I have met some trans men who have been on T for a few months, and although (or in this case because?) their behaviour and spirit appeared completely male to me, I found them VERY interesting and attractive. I think it was because of their female perspective and emotional intelligence, and probably also because they chose only the best qualities a man can have to make them their own.

[Elis]

I'm the same way. Bio men absolutely nope, but I have a faint attraction to trans guys who are pre op like me. Probably bcos like you they'd understand the trans thing and are like me, but also bcos I don't think I can like 'male' parts. Also I love women's feminity etc so are mostly attracted to women so I could end uo with either gender or gender expression. I think you may have not realised before T that you had this attraction to trans guys though, it makes sense that as you're now happier than before bcos of the T (I hope so anyway) that you reslised you also like some men.

[BearGuy]

Gender Identity and Sexual identity are two different things. T can give you a stronger sex drive, but it shouldn't change who you are attracted to.

If you are most attracted to transmen, but not cis men, is it possible that you are attracted to what they were? Another possibility is that you had some attraction for men before you started your transition, but did want to fact it. By being attracted to transmen, it might be more acceptable to you emotionally  to be attracted to them because they once had women's bodies.

What ever the reason, don't let it bother you. Its very difficult to control who you are attracted to, and as long as both parties are feel the same, I see nothing wrong with being attracted to men or women.

sam1234

Oh no, never was attracted to men. Tried to be, forced it onto myself even at one point in my life, but it always disgusted me in the end (talking about biological men). Had boyfriends, tried everything besides penetrative sex, and nope. Nope. I think I like trans guys because it's homosexuality in its "purest form" xD kind of a joke, but you know what I mean? We're both guys, and we both have the same body parts. With a bio guy, we are both guys...but then we have different bodies. I think that explains it.

I have seen a couple of trans ladies at the endo's clinic who I would date in a flash if I had the nerves to ask!!

And why not, I like ladies after all!

Ah!! I noticed that women are so much more lenient with other people's bodies than guys are. Many lesbians are okay with dating trans women, and straight women are cool with trans guys. Of course, can't speak for all, but yup. As a guy, sex is a huge priority for me, and *sigh* I can't help but be attracted to other people based on what their bodies are like underneath the clothes. Wish I could change that, but nope.



I'm glad I'm not the only one! I know I would certainly prefer to date a girl over a trans guy, but it feels like one day I MUST experience another t-dude, either romantically or sexually or both. xD

[Contravene]

Sexual preference of human is so much diverse and even flexible.

barbie~~

I agree, sexuality is fluid so it shouldn't be alarming if it changes. And anyway, where is it okay to draw the line between sexual attraction and only dating or (not dating) someone for the "parts" they have? I see so many trans guys get insulted when gay men won't date them because they don't have cis male plumbing or insulted when lesbians will only date transmen who are pre-op because they still have female parts. It's insulting and degrading as hell for anyone to have the philosophy of "I like you, I may even love you, but I can't have fun with your junk so I don't want a relationship with you" but ironically most people do exactly that and it's labelled as having a particular "sexual attraction" whether it's heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual or whatever else. I just think all these definitions of and restrictions on sexuality are b.s. but I guess that's a topic for another thread.