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how long did it take you to get over the fear of going out in public

Started by stephaniec, May 02, 2015, 07:30:27 PM

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stephaniec

that's comforting to here confusion from strangers. that happened to me once walking my dog and I past these two guys and one said I couldn't tell if that was a guy or girl.
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Teela Renee

ummm, a few months.  but I still have my moments, like if im sick I don't like going out in public cause my voice cracks real bad if im sick. on those days I just pretend ive lost my voice and refuse to speak.
RedNeck girls have all the fun 8)
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stephaniec

I usually try to limit my words as much as possible and speak softly, but I'm finding out I can get away with it because everyone in the area I live knows my past.
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Teela Renee

Quote from: stephaniec on May 04, 2015, 02:11:45 PM
I usually try to limit my words as much as possible and speak softly, but I'm finding out I can get away with it because everyone in the area I live knows my past.

I moved went I planned on going full time so no one knew me.
RedNeck girls have all the fun 8)
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stephaniec

It's pretty weird when most people know your past, they seem to be trying to help me move forward.
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Kimberley Beauregard

I don't have a fear of going out now, but it's not really all that easy to do with my current situation.  Although my parents are fine, I don't like dressing up in front of them.  However, I'll get my own place soon and I'll be out as Kimberley more often.  I can't wait.
- Kim
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CrysC

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Cindy

For about a year I went to a local pub/hotel for a meal on a saturday night, still very much in CD mode. The staff got to know me, and the bouncers made sure I wasn't hassled, and even walked me home on occasions if I was nervous.

After about a year I had started HRT and just went for it.

Funny thing is, I never go back to that pub! Yet everyone was so nice and sweet both staff and customers.
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Sabrina

It took me a while. I just don't care anymore what anyone else thinks.
- Sabrina

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rachel89

I've gone out with girl jeans, a tank top, with a guy button up shirt in my town, and I've only gotten looks from gay men. I even wore sandals with toenails painted in in the transgender flag pattern. My town is really conservative, and I am far from passing, I don't even think the thought that I'm trans crossed anyone's mind. In Fort Wayne and Indy I go out en femme. I was a little nervous the first couple times, but I feel terrible in man drag and feel a lot better going en femme. My only worry is about parents finding out before I come out to them.


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katiej

My first time in public, I was staying in a hotel in another city.  It was difficult to leave my room, and it took courage to get on the elevator.  But I was absolutely terrified to get off the elevator into a crowded lobby.   Within 10 minutes I realized that no one was paying attention to me...mostly just looking at their phones or the people they were walking with.  That's when the euphoria kicked in.

Almost a year later I still have 30 seconds of self consciousness whenever I get out of the car, but I forget all about what I'm wearing once I start doing whatever it is I'm there to do.  Though, I will admit that I'm more aware of myself at all times because I'm still focusing on my mannerisms, voice, the way I sit, etc. 
"Before I do anything I ask myself would an idiot do that? And if the answer is yes, I do not do that thing." --Dwight Schrute
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stephaniec

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Iliana.Found

Hello,
My first time out in public was last week just shy of 2months on HRT. I must say I was TERRIFIED of society. Turns out it was a wonderful experience. Not what I expected my first time out as my true self. I went to a grocery store, bought some stuff there and no one gave me a second look. Just the common look of acknowledging that someone else is present, like a little glance and then back to the way they were. The I went to a pizza shop and that's where the fun happened. On my way out these guys drove by in a truck and made eye contact. My internal response was "Oh ->-bleeped-<-, they wanna kick my ass" lol far from it. They parked, walked to the pizza shop and waited for me to drive by. Upon doing so one of the guys stares me down and gives me the biggest smile :D YAyyyy society was kind to me. That has been the usual experience that I have had since. Girls check out my outfit and guys check me out and try to get my attention(Lucky for me HRT is really workin wonders). Needless to say I no longer go out in guy mode :D

-Iliana
"It seems we struggle for a lifetime to become whole. Few of us ever do ... Most of us end up going out the same way we came in -- kicking and screaming. Most of us don't have the strength -- or the conviction. Most of us don't want to face our fears."
― The Fountain
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CassieG

I had a first look at myself dressed and made up as a woman on Thursday. I think I'll be nervous - but I can't wait to get out there. My wife was asking me if I'll change my voice - and I think I'll have a go at that as it's pretty deep. I'll write back when I finally do though and let you know exactly how it went.

Kisses

C
Looking forward to the next surprise!x
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Christine Eryn

The time was right when I felt confused about which restroom to use. Also especially when I started to build up my new wardrobe at stores that specialize in mostly women's clothes, and other women paid no attention to me like I thought they used to. Now cis females speak to me in the same manner as if they are addressing another cis women.
"There was a sculptor, and he found this stone, a special stone. He dragged it home and he worked on it for months, until he finally finished. When he was ready he showed it to his friends and they said he had created a great statue. And the sculptor said he hadn't created anything, the statue was always there, he just cleared away the small peices." Rambo III
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JessieJ

honestly.. i had tried little things like small subtle looks for the first time going out.. I have been on HRT for about 3months and fulltime for a month now.
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CassieG

Quote from: kittenpower on May 09, 2015, 04:00:05 AM
You look really pretty, Cassie :)

That is so sweet of you to say. I was absolutely terrified truth be known. I mean you turn up and 10 minutes later you're in pants, tights and heels in a room with 2 women you've never met before! I always thought I'd be blonde - but I love that wig......and bought it!! 
Looking forward to the next surprise!x
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April_TO

Personally, I don't think I can get rid of my fear. However, I have learned how to manage it. My fear has been centred on getting clocked or being read anything other than female.

However, the evidence shows otherwise. No one gives me any curious glances. However, I'm still not comfortable getting looks from people coz my mind automatically goes to "Ive been clocked"

xoxo
April
Nothing ventured nothing gained
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stephaniec

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