SO is outing me to potential employers...

[sparrow]

Many lawsuits are settled quietly without reaching court.  When they hear from SPLC, they might realize that they'll have egg on their face if they defend their discriminatory policy.  It's for the public good that public examples are made... but "public good" is not the same as "individual good", and you've gotta make the call.

As for your partner... outing you against your wishes is not cool.  It's nice that she's being supportive, but good intent does not a good action make.

[Alana_Jane]

I wasn't fired for being transgender. I was fired for "failing to comply with company policy". Apparently, though the length of a "man's" hair is not ever directly addressed in the company handbook, having short hair falls under "maintaining a professional appearance" for "men". Since I was presenting as male, I was apparently expected to have short hair.

I say keep on them.  You never know yours may be the next Price-Waterhouse v Hopkins, and make gender based dress codes specifically illegal, and that would benefit everyone. 

Sorry that this happened to you.   
Hugs

-Alana