someone tried to ask me out and I got weirded out

[Sabrina]

I was going to the pet store last Friday and had to park well across the lot. I went in got my large bag of litter and left the store with it over my shoulder. About half way to my car, some guy in a SUV asked if I needed help, I said no thank you, and then he asked if I wanted to go out for drinks, I said no thank you again. As I was driving away, he waved and I kept on driving. Granted I was showing a lot of leg with the skirt I was wearing and should expect stuff like this the more lady like I become. I was weirded out but I'm not sure if I should be. I should be flattered but am scared if someone realizes I still have my male "equipment". Plus, it seems strange to ask someone out in a store parking lot. Just looking for how others might have handled the situation. Thank you much ladies

[Mariah]

I can totally understand how you would be weirded out by it, but when it comes to guys they seem to be willing to ask us out any old place. I had one try at a bus stop. I would have probably been creeped out by that too considering he was in the SUV. He sounds harmless, but ya never know. Hugs
Mariah

[Violet Bloom]

  Men aren't my preference so I'm especially not looking forward to having to deal with this sort of behaviour.  I've witnessed a lot of it happening to women around me and also heard the craziest stories.  Men are totally weird to deal with often, no matter your gender presentation.

[suzifrommd]

Women need to depend on our intuition. If you were creeped out, there was probably something creepy. We get used to trusting our gut.

[spooky]

That guy was definitely being weird. I think in this case you were right to trust your instincts.

A gentleman will never shout at you from a car window, he will not try to GET YOU INTO said car, he will not attempt to approach you as you're loading things into your own car (to grab your keys and shove you in the trunk???), and, most importantly, a gentleman will never ever push you on ANYTHING after you've said no. This guy was not a gentleman, he was a creep, and you did well to avoid him.

[Violet Bloom]

Women need to depend on our intuition. If you were creeped out, there was probably something creepy. We get used to trusting our gut.

  Totally agree!  There was an older transwoman I knew who I sorted out was seriously hinting at wanting to date me.  Not that there's anything wrong with that but it's not something I'm keen on personally.  The real problem was that everything else about her screamed 'creepy male ->-bleeped-<-' and I got really freaked out and broke off contact.  I later was able to establish through her choices of partners that I wasn't far off with that assessment.

  Often it's best to trust your instincts.  Be especially discerning if you sense the person is only taking their own wants and needs into account.

[Kellam]

I'm a huge music nerd so I always have headphones on when I'm out and about. I have had a few guys bug me now but I can't, for the most part, hear what they are saying. That's my preemptive technique.

[Dodie]

Guys are dogs.. but I like dogs.... just not before GRS..... no dating now.. but I am getting used to the attention.. I like it...
Dodie

[emyrinth]

Please be careful about wearing headphones, try to keep one ear open to hear whats going on around you. Sometimes your only warning is the noise someone makes when they are behind you.

[Kellam]

Please be careful about wearing headphones, try to keep one ear open to hear whats going on around you. Sometimes your only warning is the noise someone makes when they are behind you.

I don't wear them late at night and I travel by bicycle mostly. I keep them at low enough volume too that I can hear that someone is talking, I just don't know what they're saying.

[emyrinth]

  Glad to hear it. I'm a little paranoid sometimes.

[Beth Andrea]

I don't wear them late at night and I travel by bicycle mostly. I keep them at low enough volume too that I can hear that someone is talking, I just don't know what they're saying.

I don't recall hearing that bad people adhere to any particular schedule...its not like day shifters are less violent than the night shift.

[KristinaM]

You could also consider getting a concealed carry permit and arming yourself.  I'm oh so glad that I did that a while back so now I can have that extra piece of mind during my transition!

[Violet Bloom]

You could also consider getting a concealed carry permit and arming yourself.  I'm oh so glad that I did that a while back so now I can have that extra piece of mind during my transition!

  All I've got up here in Canada is my wits!

[rachel89]

I would also avoid guys driving windowless vans   The only creepy guy I've had was a ->-bleeped-<- in a gay bar.

[Devlyn]

Ding Ding Ding! We have a winner in the "How long until someone uses the horrid word "->-bleeped-<-" in this topic?" contest.   

[Ian68]

No, you should not expect it.  No woman should expect to be hit on by random strangers, and certainly, they should not feel obligated to be flattered.  I'm a guy, and I have asked people who *looked* like they were struggling if they needed help with groceries (old people and pregnant women, for example).  The fact that he was in a truck, and not nearby on foot is creepy.  Then, after you told him that you didn't need help, he should have left you alone.  It's not acceptable to try to pick women up from your car window - the guy's a jerk.  Be flattered when someone gives you a genuine, and appropriate compliment, not when they just want to sleep with you (he did, trust me...). -.-

Most of my friends are women so, I hear *a lot* of this stuff...

[iKate]

I carry even in NYC but that's for really last resort stuff. Most times "no" works.

I've had a couple people try to chat me up. It was nice but I'm married.

[Sabrina]

Thanks for the advice. My first instinct was to be weirded out and it was the correct answer. There just seems something wrong about asking out a stranger in a grocery store parking lot. I am already scared of windowless vans. What's even creepier, is a van with a small circular window in the back, lights, and a disco ball. I've never seen that in person but still scary nonetheless.

[TracyCakes]

Somebody please educate me on why the word "->-bleeped-<-" is bad.  Because I haven't been a member for long, is this a term that members avoid using or offensive to some?   

As you can see from my profile pic, I am pretty easy to clock. Based on my perception, guys that have given me attention can be divided into three groups,

(1) sincere flirters that don't give a hoot about the trans issue;
(2) guys that are not interested in anything other than talking just because i am sitting in the bar stool next to them;   
(3) creepy ->-bleeped-<- guys that just want a quick encounter in the parking lot with a chick with a .....

Just the other night, I was out drinking and I told the guy sitting next to me (who obviously knew I was trans) that I was married with kids, etc. but he still waited for me in the parking lot and asked if I wanted to "hang out" with him.