Will I definitely need FFS? Please be honest lol, I can take it!

[Ⓥ]

I really apologize if I triggered anyone

OMFG I'M SO TRIGGERED RIGHT NOW!!!!  Haha, jk.

Yeah, I saw your thread on ->-bleeped-<-.  I think one person said something and you got absolutely deflated and kinda wigged out... not good

After reading that plus all of the above, I don't think FFS is the issue:  You need, need two things:  patience, and some confidence.  I think you've already heard this advice so, it's nothing new hehe.

I'll be 100% honest here:  your basic features are indeed masculine, but here's a secret that I don't see discussed much:  Good looking before, good looking after.  ...aaaaand it's almost as simple as that.  You're good looking, you know that?  So don't worry!  Again:  patience, confidence.

...But seriously, 6 weeks on HRT is almost literally nothing.  I can't wait to see your progress in May, 2016

[Ever]

What kind of insurance do you have? because my school's insurance covers SRS at 90% (as does every UC).

Furthermore, FFS can be quite affordable by traveling to Argentina or Mexico, and I got an unsubsidized Stafford loan to help me afford that.

As for what recommendations you're asking for, I think most post-puberty mtf would benefit from forehead reconstruction.  As you asked for honest suggestions, you might consider chin (with some jaw tapering to fit chin), and with the forehead contouring you might consider a slight hairline advancement (but that's hard to tell at this point).  That would total not more than $7500 perhaps.

From my perspective, nose looks pretty optional for you, and doesn't look at all necessary for feminization.  I can't see your adam's apple, so that may or may not be necessary, but would only about $1000 down south.

[PsychedelicSage]

Thank you, I appreciate it, but masculine is the opposite of good looking to me xD
But honestly I already look very slightly better since being back on my hormones.

So I have gained some confidence. And I'm done wearing a wig.

Like, I don't mean to sound conceited, but I look good for only six weeks of HRT, considering how disgusting I looked before. Like I literally looked like nature was playing some sick joke before I got on HRT x'D

All I need is better, longer bangs, a tiny bit of makeup, electrolysis on my facial hair, and time.

My forehead really isn't an issue to me because I will never be wearing my hair up. SO it doesn't matter to me.

I actually bought some blush today so that should help make my face look wider, too. And putting a tiny bit of red/pink makeup on your beard shadow, then putting concealer over it, hides it sooo much better,

Like it's not like my features are totally 100% "I'm so straight brah! Let's hit the gym and play FOOTBALL!" masculine lol.. I do have some feminine features already. A tiny tiny bit in the face and a lot in the body. But I already look far more feminine than like 99% of men after just six weeks of hormones, which is crazy because I used to look like a linebacker lmfao. But look at me now.




I'm starting to accept myself a lot more and I've accepted that transitioning happens in different stages. I can't just hide myself away and shut everybody out until I'm passable.

And there ARE lesbians who are attracted to me already.. Genetic girl lesbians. If I really looked THAT masculine, they would not be attracted to me at all.

[Laura_7]

And putting a tiny bit of red/pink makeup on your beard shadow, then putting concealer over it, hides it sooo much better,

You could try orange... according to the colour wheel its supposed to cancel out bluish colours.

And there ARE lesbians who are attracted to me already.. Genetic girl lesbians. If I really looked THAT masculine, they would not be attracted to me at all.

Yes

[Tiffers]

I saw the pictures that you posted in another thread when you were wearing make-up and I thought you were beautiful!   I wouldn't even worry about FFS at this point...just let the hormones do there thing and see how you feel after more time has passed.  Hang in there [emoji4]

[PennyW]

Hi,

I thought I'd weigh in on this thread a bit.

Way before you consider FFS, start unpicking those assumptions you have made about yourself. Get to their roots and challenge them.

"I will never be attractive enough to get dates"

Why is that? Would you not be friends with someone because they weren't attractive? Would you not work with someone who was unattractive? Sure superficial people (hello tinder) are just out for outside appearances, but real relationships come from a deep connection to someone.

"I won't be able to finish my course if androgynous"

Why not? Will they kick you out? What's holding you back?

A good therapist can help you identify and challenge these unhelpful and self-degrading thought patterns. Or if you can't get help, then go find an online CBT course and dedicate 30 mins daily to it. It can make a big difference.

[PsychedelicSage]

Hi,

I thought I'd weigh in on this thread a bit.

Way before you consider FFS, start unpicking those assumptions you have made about yourself. Get to their roots and challenge them.

"I will never be attractive enough to get dates"

Why is that? Would you not be friends with someone because they weren't attractive? Would you not work with someone who was unattractive? Sure superficial people (hello tinder) are just out for outside appearances, but real relationships come from a deep connection to someone.

"I won't be able to finish my course if androgynous"

Why not? Will they kick you out? What's holding you back?

A good therapist can help you identify and challenge these unhelpful and self-degrading thought patterns. Or if you can't get help, then go find an online CBT course and dedicate 30 mins daily to it. It can make a big difference.

Well I'm attractive to get dates now, lol! I mean as long as lesbians are able to be attracted to me, I'm fine.
Obviously I don't look as bad as I did when I posted this thread, hormones are being kind to me.





If I looked that awful right now, not very many lesbians would be attracted to me, lol.



Just if I looked extremely masculine, which I don't anymore, only straight women would want me. They would put all these expectations on me that they think a man is supposed to be, because they see me as a man. And I wouldn't be able to live up to those expectations. I am NOT manly lol.. straight women have never been attracted to me actually. The only time anyone has ever really been attracted to me is since I started transitioning actually.


Also you misread a lot of my posts.. I said I would never be attractive enough to get dates if I looked very masculine.


I actually do use Tinder and get tons of replies from gay women.


That's honestly false. Looks matter to SOME degree in relationships, no matter how little, for just about everyone. Just some people give personality a much bigger priority over looks, but that doesn't mean looks don't matter to them at all.
Like for me, personality takes much more of a priority than looks.. but still, looks matter to me a little bit. I just couldn't be with someone I have ZERO physical attraction to. There has to be at least a small amount of attraction. I am just not someone who could handle a relationship of celibacy.. xD


But I'll be friends/work with just about anyone as long as they don't flirt with me (If they're male).


And another thing you misread was that I wouldn't be able to finish college if I was androgynous..


I said I wouldn't be able to finish college UNLESS I was AT MINIMUM androgynous. Which I sort of am now so that's not really a problem anymore.
I just didn't want to have to face other people presenting myself as male. When I looked very masculine I had zero confidence because I was so disgusted at how I looked. But now I'm a lot more attractive and can pull off fun clothes like jeggings and stuff.



Thanks for the replies everyone but I think I'll just wait a few years to bother thinking about FFS again.. at the rate I'm going with my hormones it's pretty likely I may not even need it. Honestly my biggest problem right now is my beard shadow.. which I can get taken care of because there's an electrolysis clinic that I can actually afford. 

[Amy1988]

At this point I can't say but your face is structured much like mine and I have no desire to do a FFS. My only plastic surgery was a nose job. After a year or two of hormones my face structure changed. Fat deposit softened and shaped my face and I am sure but I thing my cheek bones enlarged a bit. These changes are small and you have to look hard to see them but they change your whole face. You and I both have long slim faces and with that face you need to cover you forehead. With a perm, I had my curly hair covering my forehead. I have stopped the perms, they were a real pain in the backside to get but easy to care for. My new cut will have bangs and sort of a page boy but instead of using a curler to bring the hair in, the hair will be cut on the underside allowing the hair to naturally curve toward my face. What every you do, avoid long hair because long hair will make your face look longer.
The basic rule for you is shorten your face by covering your forehead and round out your face with short hair on the side.
If you would like a conservative approach, I would recommend at least a year on hormones before considering a FFS. Longer would be better. Some of the short cuts are sexy easy to care for and can do wonders for your face. At least look at the included link and print off any short haircuts you like. I had about 5 finalist of which I picked with one I really will like once I get all my hair long enough.
www.hairfinder.com
P.S look at cut where the top back of the head is the radiating point for the hair. They do a comb forward that will do a good job of covering any pattern baldness.

Yes you will definitely need FFS and hormones if passing as female is a priority for you.  Not trying to be mean or cruel so please don't take it the wrong way.  Just being honest.  I have had quite a bit of FFS but still need some jaw work.  It's not an easy journey and it's expensive.  I've tapped into my 401K for most of mine and used credit cards.  Good luck.

[januarysunshine]

At this point I can't say but your face is structured much like mine and I have no desire to do a FFS. My only plastic surgery was a nose job. After a year or two of hormones my face structure changed. Fat deposit softened and shaped my face and I am sure but I thing my cheek bones enlarged a bit. These changes are small and you have to look hard to see them but they change your whole face. You and I both have long slim faces and with that face you need to cover you forehead. With a perm, I had my curly hair covering my forehead. I have stopped the perms, they were a real pain in the backside to get but easy to care for. My new cut will have bangs and sort of a page boy but instead of using a curler to bring the hair in, the hair will be cut on the underside allowing the hair to naturally curve toward my face. What every you do, avoid long hair because long hair will make your face look longer.
The basic rule for you is shorten your face by covering your forehead and round out your face with short hair on the side.
If you would like a conservative approach, I would recommend at least a year on hormones before considering a FFS. Longer would be better. Some of the short cuts are sexy easy to care for and can do wonders for your face. At least look at the included link and print off any short haircuts you like. I had about 5 finalist of which I picked with one I really will like once I get all my hair long enough.
www.hairfinder.com
P.S look at cut where the top back of the head is the radiating point for the hair. They do a comb forward that will do a good job of covering any pattern baldness.

Again I have to agree with Dena. After time on HRT, your face will restructure and look totes different from today. I'll probably get stoned to death but I am very anti-FFS unless you feel like you can't live without it. There are a zillion other things you can do besides such an invasive thing. Fillers can give you fuller cheeks and balance your midface. Botox can soften your whole eyeline without having to file down bone. I'm really all for the 'less is more' approach.
And it's part of the whole package...if you present as female, and carry on with the grace and natural ease of having been born in the right body, people tend to very much overlook any feature that is out of the 'absolute perfect parameters' for a female. Being happy, confident and breezy is so much more effective than radical surgeries--unless it's someone like Kaitlyn Jenner who needed it from soooo many years of being exposed to male hormones.
You're going to do fine sweetie whatever you decide

[CrysC]

Hormones help but for the love of all that's cute and shiny, grow your hair out.  Girl styled hair shouts loudly that you are female from a distance and even if you had a goatee will make them doubt up close. 

Go ahead and try to read people at distance and closer up to see their gender.  See how you do it.  You are going to mark clothes and hair which you can work. 

Also if you are on hormones and you are younger then 25 then you are way ahead of many of us girls that waited much longer.

And now that I have given such good advice it is time for wine.   

[FrancisAnn]

Just do it! You cannot look too female.

[PsychedelicSage]

Thanks for all the replies everyone!

But like I said I would rather just wait it out and see if I need it. Because I really would rather avoid such an expensive and dangerous surgery. Also I don't use credit cards, I have no credit. I am not getting FFS anytime soon.. it'll be years and years and yearrsssss before I have even a ghost of a chance of being able to afford it.

And I would like to avoid debt up until my SRS.. then I can just get SRS no matter how much I can't afford it, worst case scenario I can't pay my bills and get thrown in a women's prison xD

But if I DO need work on my face, I want something that will be permanent or at least last for a few years, not something that has to be constantly redone all the time like fillers or botox.


I have had some pretty positive changes in my face and everything else sine I posted this thread thoughhhh.:p



I mean I look pretty much feminine-androgynous now, which I thought would take me YEARS and heavy plastic surgery to be able to reach.:p To be totally honest, feminine-androgynous is good enough for me. and things will just keep getting better from here c:

My hair is definitely thicker now than it ever has been, and the thinner hair near the back of my crown isn't really noticeable anymore. Honestly I always kinda had thin hair before transitioning but it's a good amount thicker now. This hair thickening shampoo I got on Amazon works pretty well.

I am growing my hair out. I just shaved my head bald a couple months before I knew I was able to transition Dx Not a good idea lmfao. But with very long hair, I look more masculine than I actually do o.o It's weird.

Yeah I want to cover my forehead, I'm growing out my bangs.

I'm planning on growing my hair out into a slightly short asymmetrical cut.

Thankss!