Presenting question regarding name change at court

[RavenL]

Didn't put this in the legal matters forum since it doesn't fit. Anyway I'm planning on going to the courthouse Wednesday and filing for my name change. Now here's the question should I present as female? I've done some reading and its advised that I might want just to go in guy mode in case I get someone who is anti-trans when I file. And also do the same when I appear before the judge and make no mention of my trans status.

Of course then I did some reading and in New Mexico I shouldn't face any trouble changing my name even if I'm trans. But wondering if it would be best to play it safe?

[Mariah]

You shouldn't have a problem either way. I was fully honest and upfront about it and was full time when I did it so it was easy for me. The fact is they are more concerned about people changing their names to avoid paying debts and the like so I wouldn't worry about it to much because you shouldn't have any issues either way. Hugs
Mariah

[Jessie Ann]

i couldn't avoid the transgender issue because I filed a joint petition for name and gender change. I wore a skirt, shell blouse and a nice jacket for my hearing. It only took a couple of minutes and the judge had some nice comments and wished me luck on my journey.

Based on what you have stated in the past about where you live you shouldn't have any problems presenting as yourself.  In fact, it might make your case for name change stronger. Good luck!!

[Skeptoid]

I'm female on my card and full time so it'd be a bit weird trying to go as a "guy" at this point!

[suzifrommd]

It shouldn't matter. It's a simple question of law. The judge doesn't want a crowd of PFLAG types picketing his/her courthouse, so I would be shocked if you get any kind of a hard time.

So go in whatever way you're most comfortable.

[RavenL]

Thanks everyone! I'm going to call them first tomorrow since I'm getting conflicting reports if I have to put a notice in the paper first before filing. But my courts website doesn't state that as a requirement. Either way I'll go as myself either tomorrow or in two weeks and not worry about it.

[iKate]

I live in NJ. My hearing is all the way on 09/11/15. They require newspaper publication in a specific newspaper 2 weeks before at minimum.

Present as yourself, female. It will make you feel more comfortable and while it may not count for anything it shows them that you're serious. Believe it or not the court has discretion in granting a name change. That's not to say they won't, but if you go as yourself you'll be better off, I think.

For the reason I could have put "I am transgender and transitioning male to female" but I put, "I wish to assume a more feminine name to match my gender identity." I figured that had a better ring to it and more closely reflects how I feel.

[iKate]

Thanks everyone! I'm going to call them first tomorrow since I'm getting conflicting reports if I have to put a notice in the paper first before filing. But my courts website doesn't state that as a requirement. Either way I'll go as myself either tomorrow or in two weeks and not worry about it.

I believe there is a newspaper publication requirement in NM, and you have to publish it once per week for two weeks. You will get an affidavit of publication. However here in NJ they basically ordered me to do so, by sending back a court order saying to publish the hearing date in the newspaper.

[RavenL]

I just found some good info that answered all my questions on it. I can go ahead and file for the name change tomorrow. And after that also publish that I'm changing my name. But I'm still going to call ahead and make sure so I don't waste my time.

[Sydney_NYC]

I live in NJ. My hearing is all the way on 09/11/15. They require newspaper publication in a specific newspaper 2 weeks before at minimum.

Present as yourself, female. It will make you feel more comfortable and while it may not count for anything it shows them that you're serious. Believe it or not the court has discretion in granting a name change. That's not to say they won't, but if you go as yourself you'll be better off, I think.

For the reason I could have put "I am transgender and transitioning male to female" but I put, "I wish to assume a more feminine name to match my gender identity." I figured that had a better ring to it and more closely reflects how I feel.

Just like iKate says here, your better off presenting as your true self. In my case (I'm in a different county than iKate and every county in NJ does it a little differently.) The judges secretary called me to confirm the next available date which was 5 weeks later. (I did put "I am transgender and transitioning from male to female" for the reason for the name change.) The secretary went over my required documents for the court appearance and she even told me to dress as myself. She even called me the day before to confirm that I had the affidavit from the paper and asked that I come a little early as there was a big trial case after my case. You can read about how my court appearance in an earlier post, but the judge was totally awesome about it all and it went very smoothly.

[Dena]

As you are full time, go as a woman. If you went as a male, your paper work would out you just as fast as your dress would. On the other hand, the courts are very sensitive about this and when my roommate appeared before the judge, he was very careful not to say anything that would have been embarrassing in open court. The name change before her, he ask the guy several questions but my roommate was addressed as female, no mention of the past sex or name was made in court. Just relax and don't expect any surprises because it should be very routine.

[iKate]

My case is slightly different from Sydney's in that I already changed my gender marked on my DL and used feminine pronouns in the court paperwork instead of his/her. Either way though go as yourself.

[Jessie Ann]

On a humorous note, when I got the response to my request to change my name and gender on my law license in Colorado it read "Upon consideration of the Petition of (MY VERY MALE NAME) to change her name......GRANTED.....the name Jessie...shall now appear..."

I loved the fact they used my old male name with the feminine pronoun. 

[KittyKat]

I just had my name changed on July 28th and like everyone's been saying I went pretty much like I've been dressing every day. The biggest sacrifice I made was wearing jeans instead of shorts, which I got kind of annoyed about because there were at least 3 other women wearing shorts when I got there. I was just concerned about not being allowed into the court room. Overall it was uneventful the judge asked if I was attempting to avoid debts or fraud etc and then approved.

[RavenL]

Thanks ladies this has helped me get rid of the jitters I did have. One thing that I totally forgot about, also planning to change the middle name. So it would look pretty weird as a guy wanting my middle to be Lisa!

[KittyKat]

My middle name gets more questions then my first name actually. I took my grandma's names and hyphenated them, but the effect makes a really long full name, Katherine Mary-Agnes Morris. My BFF and girlfriend both think my name sounds like a Catholic nun's name which is funny because I'm a former Roman-Catholic now Agnostic.

[iKate]

I am taking my mother's first name as my middle. I currently have my dad's.

Reasons:

She supports me. He doesn't.
See above. Bears repeating.
Her name is feminine, obviously his isn't.

The way NJ driver licenses put your name and MI it's very easy to confuse it for my first name. I get called by my first name and middle initial combined together as one name. Actually as a kid I was teased about it extensively because combined it's a girl's name. With my mom's name as my MI even if they make this mistake, the name still sounds the same.

Good luck, Raven! My hearing is being published in the newspaper this week. I need to go buy a copy.

[herekitten]

I would go as who you are.  If possible, ask for a private hearing in the judge' chamber if you know who the judge will be.

[KittyKat]

I would go as who you are.  If possible, ask for a private hearing in the judge' chamber if you know who the judge will be.

Oh yeah that was the other thing. My hearing was in a public court room for various civil claims like people going for car titles, uncontested divorces, car dealerships needing paperwork etc. Basically it was a room of people you needed a judges signature that was largely going to be uncontested and the judge called everyone up by category hard there case, reviewed the case and signed off the paperwork. It all went very smooth.

[Lady Smith]

The process for name change is different here in New Zealand, but I must say there is nothing quite like getting the official letter containing your new birth certificate with your new name on it.