HRT isn't working for me :'( (please read my first post)

[Jean24]

Here are the effects that I've noticed in over 7 months: Sensitive nipples, minimal breast growth, minimal shrinkage of the guys downstairs, very slight height and shoe size reduction. Laser hair removal works noticeably better. I've been crying the last couple of nights because it's just not done anything significant. I've been out for 2 and a half years, I'm still pretty young, and yet the only noticeable advancement I have made is growing my hair out. I feel like I'm about to despair because I know a good, doctor recommended solution is an orchiectomy but I'm absolutely terrified even though it's what I want.

But I don't know what else to do. I'm sad because I don't know much about it other than it can complicate/prohibit/ cost extra for SRS and it's expensive. I was thinking about getting another endo, but I'm on a pretty high dosage of 4 different blockers/hormones and I know that increasing them doesn't do anything because we tried it. I'm starting to get strange respiratory and light headed feelings on occasion. I have to move forward though. I just don't know where I can get information about it, find a place that can do it at a reduced cost, and how to get over my fear.

Does anyone know a place/website/people with good information?

[Jacqueline]

Jean,

There are a lot of informative web sites. I am sorry I don't have a list. Just start searching and be ready to make sure that the source is reputable.

I believe that asking here and looking around on the wiki parts of this site will turn up some great info as well.

Sorry this has been hard.

With warmth,

Joanna

[Dena]

Not everybody blooms out the same way. Before surgery after 5 years of hormones I was still a AA cup and pretty bony. I never reached the point where I could properly fill out a B cup and at my hight of 6'2" it means I never had much of a shape. As 7 months you are still pretty new on the hormones when you consider that a woman might take as much as 10 years to reach full maturity. Ask about the level of hormones in your blood test to see if you are at normal levels and if you are normal, then a little more time might be in order.

[amber roskamp]

I am in the same boat for the most part. I haven't noticed any changes aside from becoming slightly softer muscle tone wise, having softer clearer skin, and nipple pain and sensitivity.

I am eight months on hormones as of last week.

The main reason I haven't seen many changes is because my testosterone levels have barely went down. It is still in the masculine range. I just got put on a bigger dosage of spironalacetone and I am hoping that it helps. Anyways it is not uncommon to not see much development in the first year of hormone therapy. So i would recommend chatting with ur doctor about hormone levels and seeing if it is necessary to up your dose. Make sure you educate yourself first on common dose sizes and typical male and female hormone levels. Unfortunately many doctors need to be educated by us since many don't have much experience with trans people. So be ready to do that.

[Jean24]

Not everybody blooms out the same way. Before surgery after 5 years of hormones I was still a AA cup and pretty bony. I never reached the point where I could properly fill out a B cup and at my hight of 6'2" it means I never had much of a shape. As 7 months you are still pretty new on the hormones when you consider that a woman might take as much as 10 years to reach full maturity. Ask about the level of hormones in your blood test to see if you are at normal levels and if you are normal, then a little more time might be in order.

I just found out today that my estrogen level is "134.2." My endo says it's good but I have no idea how to interpret that. Do you know if there's a scale somewhere online, Dena?

[Valwen]

134.2 is in like the mid female range. I was at 141 the last time I had it done. my Testosterone was 34 which is almost dead center avarage female range.

so its looking good, I personally go back and forth between sad/angry things are not developing faster and reminding myself that these things take time.

Serena, who is still going to talk to her doctor about her development anyways.

[Dena]

Somebody else will have to answer that one because we didn't even measure hormone levels. You just popped the pills and hoped it was enough (I think for me pre surgically it wasn't). Also as blockers weren't around yet, the only blocker I had was the female hormones. I would think if your Endo is comfortable with the level, I wouldn't worry about it for now and give your body more time to develop. There is nothing that says your body has to be fully developed before cross living or SRS. Mine sure wasn't. I also didn't pad my bra even though it could have used it. I was just happy to project a feminine image even though it was far from sexy.

[Valwen]

I will second Dena dont let you're development out lack of it stop you from presenting yourself as you wish to be, I was scared myself but I am so glad I didn't wait. Is my body the way I want it no. I am horribly over weight, I am desperately working on laser, my voice is awful, I have no hips and a fat stomach, my shoulders are to broad and my breasts are made of flubber. Even though my body isn't what I could hope for just the act of being myself has helped so much.

Serena

[Ms Grace]

Some genetic women take many years to fully develop their breasts, and sadly of course some of them do not grow significant breasts at all. For trans women, we are often in the same boat.

During my first attempt at transition starting at age 23 I was on HRT for just over two years and only had minimal breast growth in that time. It was very disappointing so I understand your distress and the tears. I had actually feminised a lot more than I realised, but of course I was too close to the day to day changes so was not able to see it. Anyway, this transition some 20 years later, was quite different with much better development. Other than different hormones and being older I have no idea why it should be so different.

You say your endo has you on various medications and has tried higher dosages with no noticeable effect - that's not to say another endo mightn't be better for you.