Counting down. .....

[Emjay]

To say I'm freaking out right now would be a huge understatement.   In 3.5 hours I meet with my direct manager, the ops manager and area manager for my group along with members of HR to plan/disclose my coming out at work.

I've met with HR a few times already and they've been incredibly supportive.  I can't even begin to say how thankful I am for that.   Today's meeting will mark the next step in my process.

I'm looking forward to ending this charade and just being me but oh my god I'm nervous right now!

Keeping my fingers crossed for a positive outcome. ....

[Jessica Merriman]

Go get them!! Be proud of who you are and what you are doing. People like you make it even better for those who follow.

[Emjay]

Thank you Jessica, i really appreciate it!

I am proud of who I am and this is something I have to do.

I just wish I didn't have to wait all night to do it, it's driving me crazy!   I just want it to be done.   

[Sophieraven]

Might be a bit late on this but good luck. Let us know how it went.
Sophie

[KristinaM]

details!  how'd it go?  so proud of you, and hope it all went smoothly. 

[Emjay]

Thank you, and it went really really well!   I'm still kind of in shock at how well it went.

This was a small meeting with a few members of management, myself and HR.  Basically a planning meeting that will lead to an action plan and an expanded meeting next week with a larger group of my colleagues.

So now we have a plan for the rest of my coming out and it's known within my company about me.  Well at least to those present the other night.

I know i still have a long way to go but the amount of support I've gotten so far, especially being from a very male dominated industry, has been nothing short of incredible. 

[KristinaM]

Congrats! I know you're happy happy happy and probably still have butterflies in your stomach, but stay the course!

What field are you in? I don't remember reading it anywhere.

Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk

[Samantha C]

Yippie,,,Congrats on a such a huge step, it helps so much when you have the support of your company and boss.  In my case the Hrt doc took my blood pressure and it was like 187/72 and she asked is that normal and I said it was nerves,  I had to announce my transition to all my coworkers so I totally understand the butterflies I had like 187 of them, when I came home it was 128/62 like a huge burden was gone.

Congrats to you I so happy for you...

Hugs 

[chuufk]

Thank you, and it went really really well!   I'm still kind of in shock at how well it went.

Fantastic! Well done!

... the amount of support I've gotten so far, especially being from a very male dominated industry, has been nothing short of incredible. 

Actually I am not surprised by this. I know quite a few transwomen who have transitioned in very male dominated jobs - engineers, road gang bosses, electricians, truckers, etc, etc and they all say that the amount of support they have received exceeded their expectations.

When I read people on here saying "... I could never transition in such a male industry ... " I think of all those ladies I know who have done it.

[Emjay]

Thank you all so much, I really appreciate it!

Kristina:  I work in the automotive industry, I'm in management over skilled trades. 

Chuufk:  You know, your really right about that.   There are so many of us that come from this sort of background from the military to manufacturing to you name it and we make it through because we have to.   I really am surprised about how accepting people have been so far but really, people are people no matter where they come from.   I'm sure somewhere along the line I'll find some resistance but so far my experience has been all positive.

[chuufk]

Thank you all so much, I really appreciate it!

Kristina:  I work in the automotive industry, I'm in management over skilled trades. 

As long as you know your stuff and continue to demonstrate that you can do your job then my experience to date is that skilled/technical people respect ability & competence no matter if it comes in a male, female or trans body.

Chuufk:  You know, your really right about that.   There are so many of us that come from this sort of background from the military to manufacturing to you name it and we make it through because we have to.

I sometimes wonder what people expect from us. What choice do we have? We cannot just give up. "You're so brave!" they say and I think "No, I was so desperate"

I really am surprised about how accepting people have been so far but really, people are people no matter where they come from.   I'm sure somewhere along the line I'll find some resistance but so far my experience has been all positive.

I agree. There are always twits and idiots and insecure berks of both sexes but being genuine gets through to most people. I think it is great that it has gone well for you.

[Emjay]

I sometimes wonder what people expect from us. What choice do we have? We cannot just give up. "You're so brave!" they say and I think "No, I was so desperate"

This is sooooooo true.  My boss said that he admired my courage the other day when we had our meeting.  I thanked him but said I really didn't consider myself courageous, I'm just doing what I have to do to survive. 

[Sophieraven]

Really glad it went well, I'm a trucker and told my boss in the last few weeks, it took nine days of chickening out, then after i told him i was left wondering why i'd gotten so nervous over it, it went that well. Pity it's not going so well in other areas.
Sophie

[Jacqueline]

Emjay,

Congratulations. I hope the rest of the roll out goes well. I am a ways off from this myself but it seems closer every day.

Joanna

[Emjay]

I am a ways off from this myself but it seems closer every day.

Thank you, I'm so glad too.  My boss and I talked a little last night about how we think our guys are going to handle it, we think most will be ok with the exception of a few who might be weird about it.  That's ok really, it'll be weird for me too at first.  Good weird, but weird.... 

I have felt like what I quoted above for so long.  I still felt that way when I had finally had enough and was staring at my computer screen at the email I had written to HR with my mouse poised over the "send" button.  The email that would put all of this in motion...  In a lot of ways it still feels "too soon" but it's not.  Not for me, it's really waaaaay late.  I'm so happy that things are happening now, I had just been waiting for.......  honestly I have no idea what I was waiting for.... 

My hair to grow out more....
Electrolysis to be further along...
HRT to do more for me.....
More practice with my voice.....
One more therapy or group session......

There is always just one more thing..... 

Turns out, my hair is halfway as long as I want it to be, electrolysis is probably not quite halfway done even though I have 90 hours in, HRT is still doing it's thing though what it has done so far has been amazing, my voice is still atrocious.....  etc etc etc....

I've just hit the point where I can't do it anymore is what it comes down to for me....  The excuses have stopped making sense.

Sorry, I know I'm rambling and I don't mean anything by all of this.  We all have our tipping point and I've reached mine.

It's just the statement struck a chord with me.