What to say to a therapist...

[deviousxen]

You guys have any advice on how to go about talking to a therapist?...Cause If they doubt me, cause I used to not have the, "Man trapped in a womans body" stereotype as a kid, I probably will have to wait even longer. It almost feels like the more I doubt myself and question myself, the more everything seems to unravel to nothing. I've never really had anyone give me a basic or working way to "finding" myself, and sometimes it might just be because I've become so freaking patient. I also feel like I've lost some of my self to an extent, but on the other hand I don't currently LIKE being my old self anyway.



I've heard sayings, even from my mom, thats life is mostly about CREATING yourself. And I don't really want to "create" or develop into a man. I don't DESPISE it like a lot of people, but I've had my hate of my own masculinity in the past for sure. I just think the pathway to hating it is kinda dumb...I mean nothings perfect. I just kinda feel like, if I don't go down a trail or road at this crossroads, I'll have to trailblaze into something comfortable. I don't really feel like trailblazing too much in such an ignorant world, however, I really don't like my male side at all...When I DO like it, I kinda feel like I'm just being almost sexually or aesthetically turned on by it as if I were in some other body. I mean...Maybe I'm just too experimental, and I am I admit, but I don't want to be purposely left out on the fringe as my mom puts it. I need SOME connection to something...

I'll probably get comments that say, "GO IT SLOW!" But on the other hand, I've heard, and seen transpeople that went so well in their lives, that even say they wish they could've started at a young age...
I dk... I guess "my patience" is really running loose these days...Any advice?


Appreciated Greatly,

-Xen

[InBetween]

Well, do you feel comfortable as a man? I have found that I feel very comfortable as male, and thus believe more strongly that I am.

I never had the man trapped in a woman's body when I was little...I don't even think it is THAT strong now, but I believe I am a man. I feel male, want a penis so on. And yes, the more I question it, the more I am confused. I found that if I just think of myself as male, it works, and I feel good..better than as female. More ME. Why don't you do that? Try to think of yourself as male...see if that helps. Don't focus too much either...that only confuses you more, trust me!

As for what to say to a therapist, just say what you feel. Don't hide too much, you don't want to be recomended for hormones, and later say you don't want them when it is too late. Just take your time with the hormone thing. In time (yes, I am sorry I know how hard it is to wait, but time) the therapist will decide, and then possibly recomend you for hormones. Simple as that.


Hope I helped, as this is my first real piece of advice,


-Merrick Scott

[deviousxen]

Appreciated...I don't know though. I sometimes think it will be MORE comfortable, but that I will never be truly satisfied by this fleshy shell...

Its just that, I fear I'll be stuck in this state of questioning for a long time...It goes back to the crossroads idea. It works well to explain, because I can't truly go anywhere in my life currently without deciding because it almost takes TOO much energy to even contemplate all of it. I just want to get out of this and produce things for once.

I hate this energyless and depressed state too, because everyone notices it. I can't act like myself. No one takes me seriously...Nothing. I'm just seen as some bombshell hopeless emo kid who will never do anything, and I really don't go anywhere or do ANYTHING. I can't even talk to people and string together sentences in real life situations. The only reason why this medium, typing, is so much easier, is because I'm not addressing ONE person and focusing really...I'm more dumping my thoughts indirectly...Like managing the torrent a bit...

[Christo]

What to say to a therapist

da truth

[LostInTime]

Chris nailed it, you tell the therapist the truth. Trying to be something else than who you are will only lead to trouble.

[NickSister]

My vote is for the truth too. Their job is to help you work through these issues, not act as a gatekeeper. If going slow means you reach the right answer for you then I think it is worth it.

[deviousxen]

Well one reason I'm even going in the first place is to have help FINDING the truth if I'm wrong at this point. I'm not gonna lie obviously.

[Steph]

Just to throw my thoughts into the mix...

As others have said you must be truthful with your therapist otherwise you are just wasting your time.  There are those who have "Made up stories/issues" in order to get the diagnosis they want, not the diagnosis they need.

Be open and honest, don't go in with any preconceived ideas and let the sessions develope.  There is no time frame accociated with therapy, it can be a long drawn out afair if other issues or more complicated ones are discovered, or it can be short and simple.

The issue for you is not to "Lead" the therapist and just be you.

Steph