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My Doctor Is An A**hole! Help???

Started by delalexandre, November 07, 2015, 04:23:07 AM

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delalexandre

I copy and pasted this from ->-bleeped-<-, so the formatting might be weird, and when I say "here", I mean ->-bleeped-<-.

So I have BCN of Michigan, HMO, which means I can only have one PCP. My current PCP is Dr. Mark Sikorski in Macomb, MI. I had been referred to him by my psychologist, who had warned me about him a bit before my first visit, and I'd read pretty harsh reviews on him before, but someone on ->-bleeped-<- told me he wasn't so bad, so I decided to give him a try - PLUS my psychologist works directly with him and that was the only way she'd give me a referral letter.

So I tried him out, and up until my last visit, it was all good. I received T on my first visit, which was awesome. So skip ahead 11 weeks and I'm deciding I want to start on a medication I had been taking in high school (3 years ago). I can't concentrate at all, and my ADD has cost me 2 jobs recently, so I thought I'd try Concerta again, since that worked really well for me before.

So I make an appointment, which just happened to be on shot day (Thursday), and come in to talk to him about it. First, a NP comes in to ask me all sorts of questions about why I want to take Concerta. After a minute of her constantly repeating the same question, she walked out.

THEN, Dr. Sikorski comes in, with the NP hiding behind him, and explains that he can't find any record of me taking Concerta in the past year, AFTER I'd told the NP that I took it around 3-4 years ago, and he basically thinks I'm going to misuse it. I understand, I do. Concerta is an opiate (or so he says, but I've read otherwise), and kids have been taking those like M&M's. He's just being cautious. But I sincerely need it. I've taken Adderall which just makes me angry, and I don't want to risk upping my temper when I'm taking T (it's already been bad enough).

So after he explains that, without ever telling me whether he would even THINK about it, he asks, "have you done your shot today?" to which I say yes. Why would that matter? Then he TSKS at me, like a child, and says "wow, you really screwed up."

Some more info: My first month on T, he had me come in specifically on shot day before I took my shot to get some blood work to read my levels. I was at 170, and he typically wants his patients at 300 (although it obviously hadn't been very long). He never, EVER said ANYTHING about not taking my shot again when I come to see him.

Back to the story: So he tells me I screwed up. "I TOLD you not to take your shot when you come to see me, Alex. You reaaally screwed up. What am I going to do with you? Now we can't do anything!"

At this point, both my girlfriend and I were thinking the same thing: what the hell does this have to do with Concerta? So my girlfriend, Allaura, tries bringing that up, to mention that we aren't here for my T levels at all, and it hasn't been 3 months yet - and he interrupts her!

"This is between Alex and I. Don't butt in." And she's immediately pissed. I feel bad now because I was so shocked I didn't say anything to defend her, but holy $#%& Then, he says I have to come back in to read my levels, on a different week. He tells me to come in on a Friday, and when I correct him and tell him my shot day is Thursday, he rolls his eyes at me. He asks if I need any supplies and I tell him I'm running low on needles. He writes me a prescription to get my blood checked at a local center (I live about 40 minutes away from Macomb).

Then, after he's done completely ignoring the reason for my visit, he looks at my girlfriend and says "now what is it you wanted, missy?" and she says, "I have nothing more to say to you". THEN, he starts MOCKING her!! Like a child mimicking an adult, he mouths her words in a slurred fashion, then laughs at her and says to me, "wow, look how peeved she is", like she isn't even in the room!

So after all that, he gives me some needles (without the syringes...) and the script to get blood work, and sends me away, shaking his head at me.

tl;dr my doctor is an a**hole who only thinks about hormones and won't even consider being an actual DOCTOR.

I'm lost... I've never dealt with such an unprofessional person like him before, with such bedside manner! I mean, he makes sexist comments all the time ("gotta beef up", "man up", "don't be such a woman"), but I'm just shocked that any medical professional could be this rude!

So my questions:

Does anyone know any doctors in East Michigan (preferably either Genesee or Oakland County) that either usually deal with or at least know how to deal with monitoring hormones for trans patients? I don't even care if they use the correct pronouns, I just want someone who can treat me and my girlfriend like adults and also attend to my OTHER medical needs as well.

The needles Dr. Sikorski gave me are SO LONG! I have a terrible needle phobia, so the ones I usually use are tiny insulin needles. Can I buy them without a prescription?? I buy them from Rite Aid.

Am I just overreacting? I've never been talked to like that before, and he wouldn't listen!

What should I do?? Should I find a new PCP or just deal with him? I really need Concerta, or at least some sort of equivalent that isn't Adderall. My ADD is getting the best of me and I don't know what else to do besides try that again.

Has anyone else seen him? Like I said, I had someone tell me they have been seeing him for like 9 years or something and hadn't had a problem. It's not like I was being rude or anything. And I can't have another doctor under my insurance, otherwise I would go to him solely for hormones and see another doctor for my other medicals concerns.

I'm really sorry if this was long! I just needed to rant a bit, I think, to people that would understand a bit more. Although everyone I've told have been flabbergasted. I've tried looking up other doctors in the area, but haven't found any... I was thinking about asking my psychologist, but she always cancels on me or moves my date, so I never get a chance... Maybe I should just call every doctor in the area and just ask if they work and are familiar with transgender practices and HRT??

Thanks y'all. Again, sorry if it's long or jumbled. Just... upset.
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Cindy

This is such a block of text that it is just about unreadable!

Maybe you should think of editing it?
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delalexandre

Quote from: Cindy on November 07, 2015, 04:43:16 AM
This is such a block of text that it is just about unreadable!

Maybe you should think of editing it?

Ah, sorry! I had copy and pasted it, so the format was all messed up. I tried fixing it - is that a little better?
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Cindy

Thank you! It is a lot better.

A few things. You employ a Dr to look after you. You are in control. If you are unsatisfied, and I have to admit there are points of concern in your post. Report them to the medical board.

This r seems to have an issue with relationships and of course it is very difficult to understand how that occurred. Truth tends to be built on a personal perspective, and I do not mean that rudely! Just experience.

I would report your concerns to the appropriate authority.
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Peep

My first instinct is ditch him, or report him, or both. If you decide to stick with him, you might have to be more assertive. :/
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captains

YIKES. Bad practice, bad practice, bad practice. Concerta is not an opiate, and more importantly, this guy sends up all kinds of red flags. I'm sorry this happened to you two.
- cameron
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KatelynBG

I saw this earlier on ->-bleeped-<-, but I only lurk there. You need to report this to your therapist. If they are putting requirements on their clients to only see this person, then they need to know about the Dr's behavior.
]
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FTMax

Agree with what everyone has said so far. Make your therapist aware that he is acting this way, report him to whatever governing body is available, and find yourself a new doctor. Consider asking the therapist to say something to him. Since he obviously doesn't take his patients' concerns seriously, maybe he will have a higher opinion of another professional.

As for the needles, I would've immediately told the pharmacist that they're the wrong size and asked for the needles you're used to. If you don't live far from the pharmacy you used, consider going back and asking to exchange them. You could also maybe just take them into whatever pharmacy is closest and talk to the pharmacist there about an exchange. Explain the situation and how your doctor was super busy when he saw you and ordered the wrong needles. I wouldn't see it being an issue. They may just give you some, I'm not sure.

You could call around and see what your options are as far as a new doctor. If there are any support groups around, they may be able to point you in the right direction. If there are Planned Parenthood locations they may be able to help you as well. I personally like having the same doctor take care of my primary care and HRT, but it isn't necessary. If you can find some place like PP that does hormones on informed consent, you could just find another doctor for primary care. That might even be easier than calling around to everyone if you have that option near you.
T: 12/5/2014 | Top: 4/21/2015 | Hysto: 2/6/2016 | Meta: 3/21/2017

I don't come here anymore, so if you need to get in touch send an email: maxdoeswork AT protonmail.com
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LivingTheDream

I heard that that doc was an a hole too..

Dr Randolph (Ann Arbor, Northville part time) may be able to help you. I know he does hrt but I'm not sure about him doing pcp work or not. I think he brought it up or something about being my pcp during my first visit but I'm not sure, I don't remember; was too excited about starting hrt and I see a different doc that I like for my pcp.

He's the total opposite of the one you're seeing, really nice, helpful. If it's not too far for you, I'd def look into him. I see him in a few weeks, could ask him bout it (if i remember, prolly need reminder..) Hope this helps
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Joelene9

  Doctors. I lose them to death and relocation before. The one before my current provider was a pill pusher. I dropped him. The urologist for the high PSA didn't want me to take HRT for that, but he insisted that I sign up for his prostate surgery before the biopsy was performed. I did not hesitate, I ran like hell from his office. Good thing. 3 months later an article in the AARP magazine came out of the difficulties a lot of the men had from the biopsies itself was worst than the cancer! $2 billion in unnecessary prostate biopsies performed with these with often permanent side effects!
  I found my current doctor by looking at the listings for TG friendly providers from my local TG organization's website.

Joelene
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